Panty Purge: Kicking Fat Underwear to the Curb

Redefining self-worth and letting go of the old

Let’s talk about our fat underwear

I had three pairs of fat underwear that I kept and wore when I was feeling bloated and wanted to trick myself into feeling thinner.

I’m big into decluttering, and I’ve downsized my wardrobe dramatically, tossing anything that made me feel uncomfortable or bad about myself. Worn-out socks, itchy sweaters, and too-tight jeans all got the axe.

Yet, here were these fat panties still taking up real estate in my drawer. How was wearing loose and falling-down underwear making me feel better?

The other day, I tossed them.

I’m confident that I’m not the only one who has fat underwear hiding out in their drawer.

You know the ones. Those panties we bought when our weight was up a size or two. After childbirth or during perimenopause when every hormone was out of control. Or maybe you gained 10-20 pounds during that stressful time of transitioning to a new job or during a bout of depression after a loss.

Did you know that sugar cravings can be driven by loss, grief, depression, imbalanced hormones, stress, or some prescription drugs? Let’s be gentle with ourselves if we’ve yo-yoed up and down a bit. We’re all juggling a lot.

But now your weight has settled down, you’ve adopted a new exercise program, you’re managing the stress with yoga or other meditative practices, and those fat panties no longer represent who you are.

Yet we keep them and even wear them. Why?

Purging the past

Spring was in the air the other day, an unusually warm afternoon that had me unzipping my jacket as I walked. The urge to declutter and spring clean started trickling through my bloodstream.

Since downsizing three times from a 4,200 square foot home to an 880 square foot tiny home, I don’t have much to sort through or declutter. But I still get the bug!

I looked at my underwear, and those fatty panties were taunting me. Smirking and reminding me that I’m still prone to holding on to things that no longer serve me.

Out you go, I replied and gently tossed them into the garbage.

Maybe it was just a symbolic gesture, but those types of gestures are powerful and important. They move our mindset from keeping things that don’t serve us to letting go to make room for better.

Not only was I saving something that represented a part of my life that had been stress-filled and reminded me of some of my worst health issues, but I was also keeping the door open for that just-in-case weight gain.

They were holding me back more than I cared to admit. The clothes represented the old ways I thought about myself — the berating, the shame, the guilt and judging myself excessively harshly. The reflected how I used to be. — Rachel Flaherty

What does it say about our mindset and our view of our bodies when we keep fat clothes?

Is this practice a subtle form of self-sabotage? An indicator that we may have changed on the outside but still view ourselves as overweight, insecure, or weak on the inside?

Can holding on to items that represent who we used to be, create a self-fulfilling prophecy? One that says we will gain the weight back because we lack self-control; we will lose the job because they’ll figure out we’re not qualified; or we’ll blow the relationship because deep down we know we’re not lovable.

Take a closer look at your life.

Start with the mirror or the closet. Is it time for a new wardrobe, an updated haircut, or some new makeup techniques?

Where are you holding on to the former you, blocking the new you from growing and showing up fully for yourself?

Confidently wear the right size underwear, skinny jeans, long hair, and blue eyeliner. Use the lens of permission to step into the current you. Make bold decisions that reflect who you are becoming.

I’m going to make everything around me beautiful. That will be my life. — Elsie de Wolfe

Mary Gallagher teaches women how to declutter so they can make room for what matters. She is the founder of The Decluttered Soul, a thriving Facebook community and membership. After decades of striving, she’s finally found her peaceful, decluttered writing space in a tiny home in the White Mountains of Arizona where the elk sleep under the Milky Way in her backyard. You can connect, stay in touch, and get support on Instagram and The Decluttered Soul publication.