Not All Cheaters Have Dead Bedrooms

Free AI web copilot to create summaries, insights and extended knowledge, download it at here

1972

Abstract

m glad you asked. The sex I have is absolutely meaningless. It doesn’t fulfill any part of me, whatsoever. It doesn’t tend to my body, my mind or my soul. I may cum, but if anything, that orgasm leaves me more empty than anything else. It’s like drinking salt water when stranded on a raft in the middle of the ocean. Sure. It’s water. But drinking it will eventually kill you.</p><p id="892d">Having an affair is a matter of survival at this point, so the first time someone pointed a finger at me and told me I was a cake-eater, I snapped. <i>Why judge me? You haven’t walked a mile in my shoes. Please don’t put me in a box!</i></p><figure id="f15d"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*4pwIom_4hHj-HMIU"><figcaption>Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/@kelli_mcclintock?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Kelli McClintock</a> on <a href="https://unsplash.com?utm_source=medium&utm_medium=referral">Unsplash</a></figcaption></figure><p id="7018">I hate labels. I always have. And I don’t know why we feel we have to compartmentalize every single thing. Every situation is different, every affair fills a missing piece of the big puzzle that we are, therefore, every affair is equal to the other. No adulterer is worst than another.</p><p id="ef10">If you can’t stay faithful and can’t be honest about it, you have your reasons. They could be mental or physical, or anything else in between. Your reasons are not mine to judge.</p><p id="5490">I could argue the point that one really could live without the physical aspect of married life, but I would be wrong. It is needed just as much as the emotional aspect is. As with all things, balance is needed. And cheaters, cake-eaters or not, don’t have the good fortune of having that balance.</p><p id="bd5d"><i>As a newcomer on Medium, I appreciate your likes, claps and follows. And don’t forget to subscribe to the Scarlett Letter! </i>https://medium.com/the-scarlett-letter<

Options

/p><figure id="8993"><img src="https://cdn-images-1.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:800/0*yIuzsIQ_RAevq9do.png"><figcaption></figcaption></figure><div id="7313" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/my-husband-wanted-to-fuck-and-i-said-no-31497c664580"> <div> <div> <h2>My Husband Wanted To Fuck And I Said No</h2> <div><h3>What The Hell Is Wrong With Me?</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*22zrVZxcrlRIXhNR)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="69e5" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/is-bigger-really-better-13b95e66dff1"> <div> <div> <h2>Is Bigger Really Better?</h2> <div><h3>Big Dick, Small Dick, No Dick… I Cum Either Way.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*ripnH-D_KlFC6yxGdiZeCA.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="cd9f" class="link-block"> <a href="https://medium.com/@jewelsofdenial/membership"> <div> <div> <h2>Join Medium with my referral link - Jewels Of Denial</h2> <div><h3>As a Medium member, a portion of your membership fee goes to writers you read, and you get full access to every story…</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*jdn4LrCLyCEffM0e)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

Some of Us Have Dead Everything Else, and our reasons to cheat are just as valid.

picture: unsplash

Dead Bedroom. A term I had never heard before joining the reddit channel for adultery. Most cheaters claim to cheat because of a dead bedroom, and it seems like doing it for that reason, and that reason only, is the only justifiable reason to an affair. Everybody else is a cake eater.

What is a cake eater?

After being called one, I went to look. I haven’t found a formal definition, it seems like not everybody agrees, but a comment I’ve seen on a forum defines it as follows:

“Cake-eaters are the most disgusting and vile cheaters out there. They want the stability of their marriage and the good time of cheating.”

Wow! That sounds just awful. Am I this awful?

It’s not all sweet

Yes, my marriage is stable. My family life is awesome. However, my “partnership” is miserable. I am overlooked, definitely underappreciated and I don’t feel desired. Yes, I do have sex. Not plenty, not often, but still, I do. That means nothing. Zip, zilch, nada.

What I don’t have, and crave more than anything in the world, is adult human interaction. I long for deep conversation and for somebody who will take an interest in me, what I do, who I am and how I tick. Where I live, there is no such interest. Being sapiosexual, intelligence and bright minds are the ultimate turn on for me. Without it, might as well have a dead bedroom.

But you have sex!

“But you have sex,” you will say. “What better interaction is there than that?” I’m glad you asked. The sex I have is absolutely meaningless. It doesn’t fulfill any part of me, whatsoever. It doesn’t tend to my body, my mind or my soul. I may cum, but if anything, that orgasm leaves me more empty than anything else. It’s like drinking salt water when stranded on a raft in the middle of the ocean. Sure. It’s water. But drinking it will eventually kill you.

Having an affair is a matter of survival at this point, so the first time someone pointed a finger at me and told me I was a cake-eater, I snapped. Why judge me? You haven’t walked a mile in my shoes. Please don’t put me in a box!

I hate labels. I always have. And I don’t know why we feel we have to compartmentalize every single thing. Every situation is different, every affair fills a missing piece of the big puzzle that we are, therefore, every affair is equal to the other. No adulterer is worst than another.

If you can’t stay faithful and can’t be honest about it, you have your reasons. They could be mental or physical, or anything else in between. Your reasons are not mine to judge.

I could argue the point that one really could live without the physical aspect of married life, but I would be wrong. It is needed just as much as the emotional aspect is. As with all things, balance is needed. And cheaters, cake-eaters or not, don’t have the good fortune of having that balance.

As a newcomer on Medium, I appreciate your likes, claps and follows. And don’t forget to subscribe to the Scarlett Letter! https://medium.com/the-scarlett-letter