My Sex Bucket List

Make my naughty wishlist come true!

I’ve been hesitating with this bucket list, because, to me, sex and to-do lists don’t belong in the same sentence. For sex to stay fun and enjoyable, it can’t be distilled into tasks. My average to-do list includes points like, book a dentist appointment and finish VAT returns—no fun!

‘Wishlist’ has a better ring to it in this context. My holiday wishlist contains items like spa-gifts card and various body care products that I hardly splurge on for myself. Adventurous sexcapades should be like this; opulent and luxurious treats—little escapes from the daily grind.

Another challenge was what to put on my list. After becoming single for the first time since high school, less than three years ago, I launched like a space rocket into my sexual exploration, taking me to 2.0 and beyond at lightning speed. But there’s ALWAYS more to be explored. While I expect this list to change and morph with time, I’m jumping on this recent fad and serving you a handful of my naughtiest fantasies. And after all, Christmas is around the corner, and I’ve been a veeery good girl!

1 ¯

I’ll have both, thank you! (DP)

My first threesome was with two men, but there was no double penetration involved. In hindsight, this was for the best as it all went down in a sex-club, and I was in no way prepared or ready for that.

I’ve experienced the ‘feeling’ of a DP, with a partner, adding a dildo, so I know that the sensation itself is unparalleled, but I’ve yet to experience this with two of the ‘the real thing’.

Hot tip | For those of you who are into that filled feeling, I can highly recommend trying one of those inflatable latex dildos—it’s hard to describe any other way than, Wooaaahh!!!

I’d love to combine the two experiences and have an MFM threesome involving DP.

A juicy fantasy | Someone I knew used to handpick a secret guy to join him and his girlfriend. She wouldn't know who he was and would wait, blindfolded for the mysterious Mr. X to come and lend a hand…or more accurately, a cock. Mr. X is basically just a human dildo, carefully selected and screened for the job.

Risk factor| While this scenario is top spank-bank material, my over-thinking brain often gets caught up in logistics: How do we all move in synch? Where do our bodies go in relation to each other? If I picture specific people, who goes in front and who’s behind? Finding the participants and making sure the dynamic is right also sounds like a major challenge. Lots to consider here, and I foresee a share of awkwardness—but something tells me it will be worth it!

2 ¯

Tease me until I beg for mercy…

I LOVE being teased; building up tension until I’m so hot and bothered I can barely take it. Still, I’ve never been teased by a partner for more than about 15 minutes before they give in and get to the point. I want to take this further.

I’d like to experience really extreme tease and denial. Make me a goddamn martyr!

A juicy fantasy | Ever since my cousin told me the story of the time her boyfriend tied her up, naked to a wooden beam, in a mountain cabin and then went for a walk, I can’t get this scenario out of my head. By the time he came back, she was ravaging and so turned on that every touch sent electric currents through her body.

It doesn’t have to be a mountain cabin. Anywhere safe (and not too cold) would do, but getting tied up and left sounds thrilling—and a bit scary.

And, don’t ask me why, but scary makes me super-hot (as long as I’m not actually scared)

Risk factor | Speaking of safety, that’s something to look out for here. I’ve heard horror stories of people panicking and accidentally strangling themselves in these scenarios. Therefore, I’d request that my partner go for a walk in the next room—or even casually reading a book next to me—rather than hiking a mountain.

3 ¯

Bring us the champagne, slaveboy!

This is a kinky one: Being involved in the BDSM scene, I’ve received my share of ‘slave applications’: submissive men offering to kneel at, and worship my feet and fulfill my every wish. It sounds great in theory: why wouldn’t you want a man to serve you out of their own enjoyment? You could have a housekeeper, grocery shopper, foot massager, and human footstool—all for free.

The reason why these things often sound too good to be true is…because they are. People always want something in return. I’ll write about my experiences with this in another article… I do still have a fantasy of making this scenario work.

A juicy fantasy | A girlfriend of mine has a slave-play partner who thrives on being humiliated by her. He comes over before she sees her lover and gives her a mani-pedi, combs her hair and does her makeup.

Once, he served her and her lover, bringing them champagne in between their boats in bed.

This scenario sounds super hot to do with my partner. That way I don’t have to do all the managing on my own since delegation is not my strong suit.

I can also imagine a girls-night where my girlfriends and I are served and given foot massages by a few submissive men, wearing nothing but tight hotpants.

*As a matter of fact, I’m currently considering an applicant, so perhaps there’ll be an update on this one sooner than you think!

Risk factor | I don’t see too many issues here, other than making sure your boy isn’t a creep—but that’s something to look out in every interaction.

4 ¯

Surprise ‘attack’ me in public

I’ve had a few different outdoor and public sex scenarios that have been really fun and hot, from earthy forest fucking to the time we climbed an office building and got down-and-dirty on the tar roof. The last one, which was quite exhibitionistic, was along the canal in the evening, where the people across could definitely see what was happening, yet it was too dark to make out any details.

A juicy fantasy | The first time I met a lover with whom I had a very intense D/s relationship, we went for a walk. The whole time, I watched his eyes scour for a semi-hidden place to pull me into. The scenario made me scared/hot (see #2) and dripping wet. In an industrial building, he led me up an empty metal staircase where he pushed me up against the wall with one hand on my throat, while the other investigated my body.

In the midst of it, someone started walking up the stairs, and we stood completely still, pressed up against the wall, as they walked by.

I’d like to recreate the scenario, but with a few adjustments:

We’d be slightly more hidden, in the case someone walked by, allowing us to fuck, quickly and passionately, with the thrill of knowing that someone could come at any time.

Risk factor | Apart from public nudity and/sex I don’t see much of a problem. Here in Berlin, sex in public is legal as long as you’re covered by a blanket. (Yep, I love you Berlin, you filthy little thing!) Note to self: bring blanket.

5¯

Take me to dinner with a remote-controlled vibrator

I’ve based an entire erotic story on this fantasy and it’s been on my wishlist for a while. Using a remote control, insertable vibrator in public sounds both hilarious and hot at the same time. I’ve only briefly tried one, and it made me curious for more. So did Meaghan Ward’s story about her experience!

A juicy fantasy | I love handing over control to someone I trust. I also love all kinds of sneaky missions in public.

We’d go out for a nice dinner where my partner would control the strength of the vibrations, and turn the device on and off at their leisure.

I imagine having to bite my lip and work pretty hard to disguise my moans—pretending I’m just very excited about the food.

Risk factor | The only real risk is that someone understands what’s going on, which would be embarrassing and a tad humiliating. But then again, some of us happen to be turned on by that kinda stuff, so it’s a win-win.

*I have a sneaking suspicion that this fantasy might get crossed off the list very soon. I received this small package yesterday, and if it contains what I think it does, we’re talking hours. Wish me luck!

6¯

I’m the writer and director an artsy-porn short

I’m personally not a fan of mainstream porn. Every time I try to watch something, the poor aesthetics, bad lighting, and awkward storylines distract me too much to turn me on, and I find the images in my head much nicer to ‘watch’.

When I found X-confessions a few years ago, through a friend who worked on set, was the first time I ever paid for porn.

I immediately started playing with the idea of taking the images out of my head and translating them to the screen.

There’s so much potential for creating porn that is both beautiful and arousing, and that doesn’t have to be demeaning to women or portray a false picture of what sex really is!

Erika Lust hit me up—or expect an upcoming script :D

7¯

Ladies night gone rogue: An all-girl orgy

I’ve had a few threesomes, some moresomes, and I also threw a private BDSM sex party with a group of friends once. I’ve been with one girl alone, but never with more together—without any men present.

I fantasize about reclaiming the silly fantasies our male friends and partners joke about, whenever we host our ladies nights: Naked pillow/food fights and witchcraft gone rouge.

I picture this a next level pajama-party; candlelit and wine-fuelled, sexy, sensual, messy and lots of fun.

In conclusion

With a couple of exceptions, there are few things I wouldn’t be willing to try, as long as it’s (mostly) safe and not a health risk. Sex is one of our ultimate expressions of creativity, and tapping into can be very healing and liberating.

Don’t forget to take a look at these for further ideas: Demeter’s list, Meaghan’s list, Yael’s list, Nicole’s list and T.S.’s list—thank you all for the inspiration!

I wish you all happy exploring!