avatarManas Bhardwaj

Summary

The author reflects on a toxic friendship, acknowledging the negative impact it had on their life and expressing gratitude for the realization and recovery from the experience.

Abstract

The article "My Best Friend was Toxic" delves into the author's personal journey with a toxic friend whose manipulative and deceptive behavior led to a significant decline in the author's self-esteem and happiness. The author recounts the emotional turmoil and self-doubt instilled by this friend over two and a half years. The narrative turns with the support of online friends who helped the author recognize the toxicity and take steps to rebuild their confidence and self-worth. The article emphasizes the importance of identifying and ending toxic friendships, listing signs of such relationships, and encourages readers to value themselves and seek healthier connections.

Opinions

  • The author believes that toxic friends can mask their true intentions with a seemingly friendly facade.
  • The author expresses regret for not recognizing the toxicity earlier and for the loss of real friendships due to manipulation.
  • There is a strong opinion that toxic traits in a friendship are characterized by a lack of accountability, consistent negativity, and the erosion of the victim's self-esteem.
  • The author suggests that happiness, confidence, and love can be significantly diminished by a toxic friend.
  • The article conveys the idea that speaking out about one's experiences can be therapeutic and enlightening.
  • The author emphasizes personal responsibility in allowing toxic behavior and advocates for taking charge of one's life to eliminate negative influences.
  • There is an appreciation for the power of new, positive relationships, especially those formed online during the pandemic.
  • The author concludes that ending a toxic friendship, though challenging, is ultimately beneficial for personal growth and well-being.

My Best Friend was Toxic

Devil’s intentions with an angel’s face

Photo by Noah Buscher on Unsplash

Thank you.

For introducing me to the dark side of life. For making me believe, I was not good enough. For crushing my self-confidence and self-esteem.

Stunned, how I never doubted you, although you were the sole reason, I became friends with self-doubt.

Those 2 and half years of negativity, bad vibes, complaining, making me feel inferior. Shocked, how I never caught your true intentions.

You will never be able to feel, what I felt.

I trusted you to high heaven. You broke it like a small plastic toy. Yes, this story is about you.

But, you will never get to know, cause you never treated me like your best friend.

Thank you to my online friends, if I never spoke out to them about you, I would never be able to know, how badly I was treated.

Thank you once again, now I know how to bounce back in life when someone throws punches at me.

Not all school friendships are ever-lasting. Some can give a real hurt in your ribs.

Toxic Traits

Behaviour of a person shows, how much he or she is interested in you. In the beginning, it will feel like, it’s okay, everyone has some bad habits. I agree, even I have some bad habits.

But, toxic traits are an outcome of blaming your wrongdoings on someone else. Over time, you will start to feel, that they are taking more from your life than investing.

The small things they snatch from your life are not so small in the long run.

Happiness, confidence, love to name a few.

She blindsided me and make me believe my Real Freinds are the imposter. She used to speak ill for my friends, in front of me, and vice versa. I was a fool, I trusted her and lost my real gems on the way.

Hey!, my real friends, I want you back in my life. ( If you are reading this, I am sorry) .

Never really cared to share her problems with me. Every time I call her, she declined to give some vague excuses.

Busy to meet with me but, not so busy to hang out with her friends and post a photo. I still remember, how bad it hit me seeing all this.

Still, I thought that I need to change. I have something wrong in me.

We used to have a nice talk, once in a blue moon, and again she used to ghost away for weeks. The calling and declining process continued.

Then, I started following her on Instagram. We talked for a couple of days. Shockingly, she stopped seeing my messages. That was the breakdown point for me. I am not ashamed, I cried a lot those days.

My parents were concerned cause those days I am usually in my room, eat nothing, started getting low grades.

She was the last hook, I can hang myself as I lost all my friends on the way thinking they were the real snakes in the grass. Her behavior towards me continued for years.

It was all my mistake. Why I let her behave to me in such a bad manner? Ughhh.

Unfortunately, the above line comes after I spoke to my online friends about the situation.

Today, I am back with the same confidence, happiness and love for all. I trashed her into the dustbin, blocked her from all social media handles.

A Ray of hope

Meeting new people and making friends is as important as retaining old ones. You will be introduced to a whole new spectrum of perspectives, which can change your life.

I made a lot of new friends in the online world. Especially during the pandemic, as we all are stuck inside our homes. These people treated me so well, I can’t over emphasis.

It feels so good, to be full of energy, positive vibes.

I am happy from the heart.

Sometimes long distance friendships can do wonders for you.

Until someone comes to help you, you won’t know how deep you have been stuck.

It’s so ominous that one person can have so much of an impact on you if you give the steering wheel of your life to them. Never do this. You are responsible for your life. Responsible for whatever happens to you. Take charge and eliminate the waste.

Final thoughts

Ending a toxic friendship can be challenging, but it’s fruitful.

If you feel lonely and isolated from him or her, it's time to let go of that friendship.

You may feel of giving a second chance. But, in my experience, if a bond is broken, it will always have a crack, irrespective of how well you have polished it.

Some people, just can’t give up on their past. It’s always in their mind. Below, are some indications of a toxic friendship. If you feel any of these happening to you, break the poisonous bond.

  1. Toxic people are manipulative
  2. They don’t apologize
  3. They make you defend yourself
  4. Toxic people are inconsistent
  5. They are not caring, supportive, or interested in what important to you

Take care of yourself. Give yourself more time. Believe your intuitions. Don’t let anyone treat you like you have no worth. You are invaluable my friend.

Thank you for reading! Have a nice day.

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Mental Health
Life Lessons
Self
Friendship
Self Improvement
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