It’s So Difficult to Make Friends as You Age

I want to make new friends, but it’s tough out here.

Ever since committing to my emotional development and growth, I’ve lost a lot of friends or people who I thought were friends (they were only there for a good time).

Not to say I didn't have real friends, I did, but I changed. I began to focus my time and energy on my future, my goals, and my dreams.

As much as I wanted them to grow with me, I couldn’t do that for them.

And ultimately, a lot of the close friendships I had ended.

It was a tough moment. It still is, to be honest.

But I realized if I prioritized giving my time and energy to those individuals and the activities they wanted to prioritize, I would be forgoing working towards my goals, and that’s a trade I’m no longer willing to make.

Now that I’ve gotten a little bit older and wiser (I’m only 27), I have a very good idea of the types of people I would like to surround myself with. However, finding these kinds of individuals is difficult!

We tend to be introverted and guard our energy.

Those of us who’ve chosen to pursue personal development and accomplish our goals understand this.

I love being at home, and I rarely leave my apartment. Which is probably the number one problem.

I’ve learned through counseling that I’m the kind of individual who needs to recharge their energy away from people.

As much as I like social events and settings, after a certain amount of time, I feel drained of energy.

And now that I have clear goals that I want to reach, I have very limited energy to dedicate to said social events.

I want to meet like-minded people who are growing, learning, and changing their lives.

But maybe it’s not time for that yet since I’m currently focusing on my health, my career, and my financial future.

People who choose to change themselves are rare.

Another obstacle I’ve noticed that gets in the way of making real connections in friendship is individuals who pursue self-development are rare.

In addition, I don’t know where to find them! At least I don’t know where they are relative to where I live.

The point is there’s a scarce amount of people who are making it a priority to become cycle-breakers and change their lives and themselves for the better.

Social media gives us a false feeling of companionship.

Another thing I’ve noticed since I stopped going out and socializing as much is that I rely a lot more on social media for the feeling of camaraderie.

There are a lot of seemingly good people on the internet who sound like the people I would like to associate with. The problem is I do not know them personally and probably never will, so this gives me a false sense of being part of a group.

The truth is, I’m not friends with these people. I resonate with what they say, but there’s no relationship.

The only way to create a friendship is through communication and quality time.

You may be able to communicate through social media, but nothing builds a bond like spending time together in person.

So here are a few reasons why I’m finding it difficult to make friends as I age.

What other reasons do you think it may be hard to make friends as we age?