It’s Smart to Move to a Red State

This could be a viable alternative to switching countries

I waffle: should I move to Ireland or Panama?

It’ll be hell dragging my spouse out of the USA, cost us a bundle, and this introvert doesn’t treasure making new friends. Then there’s the paperwork.

On the other hand, I could hunker down in this red state, where I moved three years ago, and rest on my laurels.

I moved from Tucson, Arizona, which turned purple in the rear-view mirror, to Arkansas — and it doesn’t get any redder than The Natural State, y’all.

So why would I move again? The short answer — it’s painful to watch our voting rights threatened, and I firmly believe we will elect another Republican in 2024, probably someone like DeSantis but possibly Trump.

Americans don’t like inflation, especially pricey food and gasoline. Worse, we are struggling to maintain consensus on how (if) elections work.

I also fret about healthcare, which will cost a minimum of $72,000 (9 years times $8,000 per year) before I cross the finish line called Medicare. That’s assuming nothing goes wrong and Blue Cross/Blue Shield doesn’t raise my current monthly rate of $635.

Don’t get me started on how %$#@ up our healthcare system is.

Red States: Is the Fear Overblown?

I live in a gated community called Hot Springs Village, a monument to 1970s utopia and chock full of people over 55 (though that’s not a requirement). It’s 80% Republican, and church is popular. It happens to be in central Arkansas.

Sound awful? Here’s why it isn’t.

These are mostly old-school, Mitt Romney Repubs, meaning they are conservative in a white, corn-fed, grandpa/grandma kind of way. In other words, I’ve met a lot of nice people who have ideas I consider whacky, but they aren’t rabid, and still believe in voting.

From my perspective, they are clueless on important issues, like racism and sexism, and homophobia — on the other hand, I feel many are willing to have a civil discussion.

Imagine a whole lotta people who don’t understand TikTok or how to ride a Lime Scooter.

I readily admit as a white woman, my perspective is limited.

Second, although only about 20% of us are Democrats, we are a progressive bunch. At the Unitarian Church, they welcome atheists, Jews, Muslims, and people like me — Frisbeetyrians! (We believe the soul is shaped like a giant frisbee, and death is when it goes up on the roof and you can’t get it down).

Third, polite people don’t discuss religion and politics in public. So I gravitate toward civility. Are my buddies in community theatre or pickleball as red as a clown’s nose? Could be, but who cares? I practice “don’t ask, don’t tell.”

When religion or politics comes up, I use it as an opportunity to educate rather than alienate. I’ve found ways to confront racist remarks.

“I don’t endorse intolerance,” and “Don’t be racist,” seem to work.

Housing is Extremely Affordable Here

Don’t confuse us with the rabid Trumpites in “The Villages” in Florida — which also has affordable housing — if you Google Hot Springs Village.

The real estate boom didn’t miss us, yet it’s still possible to find a bargain. I moved here 3 years ago and purchased a townhome for $55K, then sold it last year for $95K.

So, you can still get a 1270-square-foot townhome on a golf course for about $120K. Fees for property owners association and townhome association run $185 a month, which includes yard work and access to lakes for swimming, golf courses for walking, etc.

If you buy a place outside the Village, in Jessieville or Fountain Lake, you will also get a bargain, privacy, and no fees.

In the town of Hot Springs, homes are a bit pricier but still extremely reasonable.

It’s Impossible to Get Bored

I’ve joined church, clubs, and I chat with neighbors. As a nature lover, this place had endless options and the same goes for sports.

I play basketball once a week with a group of older ladies (the Arkansas Diamonds senior league just won gold at the National Senior Olympics!), am trying out pickleball, and recently joined community theatre.

Churches are all around — it’s the bible belt — so I signed up at the UUVC, which is extremely liberal. I serve on the Events Committee, go to monthly game night, and sometimes help weave mats for the homeless out of plastic bags. I also help the coffee/tea lady out on Sundays as her “understudy.” She’s 83 so she’s wisely delegated someone to be her back-up in case, in her words, she woke up feeling wonky.

Red States vs. Other Countries

The advantages that come with colonizing a red state are not trivial. They are also my husband’s major objections to moving.

1/ You don’t need to learn a new language

Unless mastering proper use of “y’all” is an issue, moving to the south (or midwest) doesn’t mean learning a new language.

2/ No passport or other paper trail is necessary

I’m still trying to figure out the personal property tax here in AR, but that’s nothing compared to the bureaucracy of Portugal or Costa Rica!

3/ It’s fairly easy to visit family

We’ve had a few visitors. The weather is decent in winter, and there is plenty to keep them busy. I’ve driven back to Tucson for a winter break, and we plan to caravan back to the desert for January 2023.

4/ It’s more affordable

Moving to another country is going to cost several thousand dollars. If you want to relocate to Europe, the cost of living (excluding Portugal and some Baltic nations) will rival many American cities.

5/ It’s cheaper/easier to change your mind

It’s more common for expats to return to America than you might think. There are many reasons for this, including the cozy familiarity of the culture you grew up in, and distance from family (especially grandkids).

6/ You don’t have to abandon the good ole USA

I’ll admit, I’m of two minds about fleeing my homeland. I tend to think I’m doing what smart Germans did in the 1930s, but maybe I’m blowing our current political nightmare out of proportion?

Final Red, White, and Blue Thoughts

When I got to Hot Springs, I found a lot to love that I hadn’t anticipated: free spring water from Hot Springs National Park, a chance to swim in a nearby lake whenever I like, hundreds of miles of paved roads for bicycling, and the joy of low traffic.

I also love not having to decide which hardware store or thrift store to hit up, because there is only one place to buy nuts n’ bolts and three secondhand shops.

This recent Medium article suggested we who are in the majority — who support gun control and abortion rights — should colonize the red states. It’s not a bad idea, is it?

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Jean Campbell recently started her first Substack newsletter to laser focus on getting her book, City of Lies: A Street Hustler’s Omaha Story, published. But wait, there’s more! For free humor on Substack, check out Flying Monkey Mind.