I’m Queer, but I Don’t Fit the Stereotypes
I’m a mess of contradictions. I’m human.
Don’t judge a book by its cover
I’m a queer woman who loves country music, grew up riding horses, definitely wears the pants in my relationships, hates wearing makeup, and keeps my hair short with a close shave on one side. I also own way too many pairs of earrings (I especially love big dangly ones), I can’t resist a pretty pair of shoes, I love painting my nails, I own seven pairs of glasses so I can match my frames to my outfit, and I attend church every Sunday I can.
As a child, I prided myself on being a “tomboy” which I defined as being able to “keep up with the boys” my age. I helped my dad build an addition on our house when I was a tween, and every time he was working on one of our vehicles, I was out there watching and asking questions. I had a part time job helping a local rancher with odd jobs in between riding lessons.
I’ve always been very creative. I started writing stories and poetry when I was very young. I spent years playing piano, and it was so much fun I tried my hand at trumpet, flute, and guitar as well. I dabbled in pencil sketching for a little while. As a young adult, I developed an interest in fashion, which I see as an extension of this interest in art and creativity.
Not all that glitters is gold
My earring collection started in my teens and is an eclectic mix of unique and traditional, strange and tasteful. I pretty much have a pair of earrings for any mood. Most days I match them to my outfit by colour and style while other days I try to “match” in unusual and creative ways.
I do the same thing with my glasses. I buy them online for super cheap and I match my frames to my outfits. I love expressing myself in these ways.
Not an affiliate link, I just like sharing the joy of cheap glasses:
I cannot stand wearing makeup, except for a little eyeshadow and lip gloss sometimes. I don’t have the time or inclination to do even that most days. Even though my ginger eyelashes are nearly invisible I hate wearing mascara. I’m a crier, and if I don’t want raccoon eyes, I have to use waterproof mascara, and it irritates my eyes. Lipstick tastes gross and wipes off on everything.
Yet, I still remember the Christmas when my mom put a bottle of bright red nail polish in my stocking. I was so excited I painted it on my fingernails right there in the living room before breakfast. I love adding colour to my nails, both fingers and toes. Looking at my painted nails makes me so happy.
In my twenties and thirties, I got into high-heeled shoes, and I just love how they look. I had changed jobs from fast food, where I had to wear super comfortable non-slip runners, to an office position, and heels were suddenly a possibility for me. I spent several years having great fun with various colours and heights of heels. Then, a couple years ago, my feet started to complain and I put my heeled shoes away, and invested in some pretty flats and runners.
My sense of style is an eclectic mix of men’s and women’s fashion. I like to wear a necktie once in a while, though I have to keep it loose or I feel like I’m choking, and I love a nice suit jacket. I also love wearing dresses; those loose flowy long “maxi” dresses or miniskirts with leggings are my favourites. Truly, my favourite clothes are ones that are comfortable enough to sleep in.
Appearances can be deceiving
Most people who know me casually probably assume I’m a straight cis woman. This is understandable since I’m married to a man and I work in a traditionally feminine occupation (I’m an administrative assistant for a school board). Only those who know would notice the bi flag coloured bracelet I wear and the bi flag displayed on my desk.
I don’t fit into a box.
This story is a response to the Prism & Pen writing prompt: I’m LGBTQ, but You Don’t Know THIS About Me.
