avatarSherry McGuinn

Summary

The author expresses their disgust and intrigue after reading a detailed account of an unusual sexual encounter involving defecation.

Abstract

The author describes their experience of reading a highly explicit story about a sexual encounter that resulted in defecation. Despite their initial disgust, they found themselves unable to stop reading due to the quality of the writing. The author reflects on the prevalence of explicit content on Medium and questions whether they should incorporate similar themes into their own writing to gain more readers and curation. They also express concern about how their existing audience might react to such a change in their writing style.

Opinions

  • The author is repulsed by the explicit content of the story they read.
  • The author acknowledges that the story was well-written, which kept them engaged despite their initial reaction.
  • The author questions whether explicit content is necessary to gain more readers and curation on Medium.
  • The author is concerned about how their existing audience might react to a change in their writing style.
  • The author expresses disbelief at the idea of people being aroused by feces.
  • The author humorously suggests that they might try writing about other bodily functions to see if it increases their readership.
  • The author is critical of their own reading habits, questioning whether they are becoming desensitized to explicit content.

I Just Read a Story about Crap

And now I can’t get it out of my head…or nose.

Source: Free-Images.Com

There is TMI, and there is extreme TMI.

I would wager that the story I just read, falls into the latter category. And I read the whole damn thing while drinking my morning coffee. I choked a couple of times but I’m nothing if not resilient.

Ask me why I read it later because I still don’t know.

The story is about someone who took a ride on the Hershey Highway while having sex. A specific type of sex.

It was very descriptive. The color, the smell, the density, the volume — it was all in there. In fact, the rancid scent of it invaded my sinus cavity and now I may have to use a Netty Pot to get it out. Or some very strong weed.

The writing was good, I give it that. And maybe that’s why I rode it through to the end. But then I hated myself.

Now, I wrote a story about peeing myself years ago. But crap…crap is a different beast, entirely. I mean — it’s crap, for God’s sake!

For the over two years I’ve been writing on Medium, I’ve seen a boatload of stories where sexual activity is broken down in such a way that anyone with voyeuristic tendencies can have a field day.

Every moan, every thrust, every squirt is documented all the way through to the money shot. Boo Rah!

Could this be why I never get curated? Why I’m in the shit here, so to speak? Pun intended.

Perhaps I don’t disclose enough of what people really want to read about. Fucking, sucking, and voiding. And not just voiding, voiding while fucking and sucking.

OMG, if I were to do this, would I lose my fan base? What would my friend Helen Cassidy Page think of me? I’m cringing just thinking about it.

Because Helen does not poop. I’m sure of it. I don’t either, actually. I’ve left that particular bodily function by the wayside. It’s for the best.

Or maybe I’d gain even more fans. And possibly a curation or two. I could try it I guess. “Give it a go,” so to speak.

But again, the question remains: Why the hell did I even read this poopy piece? Am I becoming one of those readers? The readers who routinely champion crap?

In the story, the people involved neglected to empty the pipes before jumping into the fray, and, in the interest of “science,” I did a little research and found out that yes, indeedy, unloading during this particular sex act is fairly common.

And there’s not a whole hell of a lot one can do about it other than to jump in the shower, throw those sheets in the washer and call it a day. Maybe add a little disinfectant if you haven’t ingested it all, per the Orange Turd.

Oh. But then you’d be dead.

Sex is messy. No doubt about it. It’s wet, sticky, sometimes smelly. But I just can’t imagine being covered in crap while getting busy. As it stands, I am very particular about my bed linens. I change sheets twice a week, without fail.

Twice!

In liveabout.com, I read that sometimes, surprise craps during sex aren’t surprises at all, but actually planned, as if one or both of the partners got off on it.

I’ve heard of “golden showers,” but “brown baths?”

I think it’s time for me to do an about-face and write about topics that I’d normally eschew. (Don’t you love that word?) Maybe something about riding the crimson wave during sex. Now that’s hot. From what I can recall, anyway.

Or farting. Or “queefing.” Or any combination of the above. Let’s make it a group thing! I’ll show you yours, you show me mine.

I wonder how many other stories like this one I can unearth on Medium. There might be a whole Crapapalooza that I’m missing out on.

I’ll do the research and get back to you. You can thank me later.

Sherry McGuinn is a slightly-twisted, longtime Chicago-area writer and award-winning screenwriter. Her work has appeared in The Chicago Tribune, Chicago Sun-Times, and numerous other publications. Sherry’s manager is currently pitching her newest screenplay, a drama with dark, comedic overtones and inspired by a true story.

Did I leave an impression? I hope so. Source: Free-Images.Com

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed this piece of crap. If so, please check out the other stories below.

Also, if you’re seeking further distractions during this tough time, please consider subscribing to my new newsletter, where I’ll do my damndest to keep you entertained.

Sexuality
Humor
Writers On Medium
Satire
Anal Sex
Recommended from ReadMedium
avatarGuided Space by Jessica Mendes
Meeting Your Twin Flame While Married

14 min read