Summary

The author describes a personal strategy for managing overthinking by naming the problem, rearranging their environment, and rekindling their creativity.

Abstract

The article titled "How I’m dealing with overthinking" is a personal account of the author's struggle with obsessive thoughts and the methods they've developed to cope with it. The author identifies their overthinking as a response to unresolved challenges, which leads to a cycle of self-doubt and emotional exhaustion. To regain control, they employ a three-phase approach: first, acknowledging their worth independent of immediate problem-solving and identifying their emotions; second, altering their environment to remove triggers and encourage breaks, while surrounding themselves with supportive influences; and third, engaging in simple creative activities to reignite their inspiration and facilitate a breakthrough. The author emphasizes the importance of this process in overcoming the numbness of overthinking and finding motivation again.

Opinions

The author believes their tendency to overthink is linked to facing obstacles they initially cannot overcome.
They acknowledge that their self-worth is not contingent upon their ability to solve problems immediately.
The author recognizes the need to set boundaries with people, even those they love, to prevent emotional triggers.
They admit to the influence of media, such as TV and books, on their emotional state and prefer stories with happy endings to avoid negative feelings.
The author distances themselves from certain philosophies and creators that do not align with their personal growth.
They find that restriction and space in their environment lead to naturally attracting positive influences.
The author emphasizes the importance of creativity in their life, viewing it as essential to their sense of wholeness.
They see overthinking as a precursor to a breakthrough, suggesting it may be a necessary phase for personal and creative growth.

How I’m dealing with overthinking

I am an obsessive person. That’s how I work. When I like and do something, I dedicate myself to it. It tends to work great for projects. As I can do in days, what may take months for other people. But it has a major draw back.

Overthinking.

Skull source: https://freevintageillustrations.com/

It’s like the machine — my brain — is going faster than the human (me) can cope with. And once a cycle begins, it never stops, it follows me everywhere.

I overthink in the shower. I overthink when I walk. I overthink when I sleep. No kidding, I dream about it too.

And it usually comes to a point where I can do nothing else than overthink.

I feel trapped. Exhausted. And numb.

This is not useful. That’s why I have developed a way to deal with this.

And it happens in 3 phases:

1. Name-calling the culprit

I realized I start to overthink when in front of an obstacle I don’t know how to get past.

It might be an intellectual challenge. A skill I don’t understand how to improve. Or a purely technical limitation I haven’t found a way around.

Not to brag, but I’m usually pretty good at finding solutions. So when I don’t… I get stubborn. And when I still don’t understand, I question my worth. And that’s precisely when I start to overthink.

Funny enough, I always forget this. And it seems I’m re-learning the lesson every time I go through an overthinking cycle:

My worth is not tied to my ability to resolve this right now.

This is the key that puts me in control again. And the numbness fades a little.

It fades even more when I finally take the time to name exactly what it is I am feeling.

Anger? Sadness? Frustration? Despair? And what about?

It feels like tidying up my own head.

2. Re-arranging the ecosystem

Once my emotional spring-cleaning is done, I usually realize my environment is not helping.

So I take a hard look at my whole ecosystem, with three objectives:

To restrict my access to triggering and numbing factors
To encourage breaks
To surround myself with what I need

I find restricting triggering and numbing factors to have the biggest effect.

People. Who we allow to take space and time in our lives, is a big factor. Especially for me, as I’m extremely introverted. It can even be people I love. But if they trigger some emotional response that fills my overthinking, I set stricter boundaries (sometimes just for the time it takes me to feel better).

TV and books. And this one is a bigger one than I’d like to admit. If I get too invested in the story, and the story goes south, I have a hard time getting rid of the emotions the story makes me feel. This is why I stick to happy endings.

Philosophies and concepts. I tend to want to apply everything I learn to my own life. But some philosophies just don’t work for me. I haven’t unpacked yet the reasons for that. For now, I just know, they do. So I distance myself from some creators.

I don’t do it all in one go. Determining what is triggering, and what is helpful, is not easy to do when you still feel a little numb. So I break away from my environment. Often by going on long walks.

But eventually, restriction and space attract better things. People, content and philosophies that are helpful, and motivating, just come naturally, because I am more open to them.

So by the end of that phase, the numbness is gone, and I feel refreshed. It feels like I am out of the labyrinth. I don’t overthink anymore. I am like a blank page.

3. Recalling my muse

Creating is a constant for me. I do not feel whole if I am not creating… something.

So I start simple. A drawing. A dish. Putting together a table. Or playing a new song. It all helps.

I tend to stay away from writing at first, because writing requires thinking. So I stick to my brushes, keys and spices. But I soon come back to it. Once my muse is back.

And that’s usually when the magic happens…

When I start writing again. And thinking again. An idea pops up. The motivation is back. And I’m on top of the world again.

It’s a breakthrough.

A breakthrough like this never happens on its own. And however cruel it might seem, to have to go through it all, I believe overthinking is actually a clue that a breakthrough is about to happen.

Or needs to happen?

And so :

Tidying up my own head by tagging and organizing my feeling
Cleaning up my ecosystem
And find my muse again

…might be nothing but a ritual to prepare me to receive that breakthrough.

Like the one I had about my note-taking system.