Here’s What I Learned — Writing is Like Having 365 Wives
From Rambo to Casanova with a slice of Shakespeare

As a writer, each of your days is very different since you never know what to expect from your significant other. You wrote for Jenny the other day but today you’re writing for Kristy or is it, Mary? You have to know the audience you’re writing for.
You see, you never know what to expect after you publish a new article or a new poem. How will your significant other react? Are they in a good mood or a bad mood? Are they happy or are they sad? Do they want adventure or romance?
Trying to please 365 people is no easy task. Each of those individuals has their own personality. You won’t find one like the other. You’re best bet is to always give them what they need.
So writing is essentially like having a different partner every single day of the year. Each day, you never know what to expect after you hit publish. The mood of your fans change and will give you the results you may or may not expect.
- Are your fans in a good mood or are they in a bad mood?
- Is their life hectic?
- Will they love your work or will they hate it today?
I was walking around my house this morning when this title just popped into my head. Trust me, I can’t tell you how your fans will be on any given day. The most you can do is write. You need to write for them but still be you.
Be yourself
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.
Steve Jobs
Trying to please your significant other is a daunting task. You may think you know what you’re doing one second only to find out it backfired. Writing is the same way.
With all of the articles and poems you have put together, did you get different reactions every time you hit publish? Writing can be very temperamental. It’s good to be on your best behavior and give your fans exactly what they want.
You can’t be boring. Every once in a while you need to be romantic, have a little action and drama in your work of art. Maybe you need to show a little laughter from time to time.
Knowing who you are will be the most important part of a writer. You have to be yourself but you also need to know what your significant other likes as well. In a sense, you also need to be a mind reader.
Write for your significant other
Write with conviction.
Pick a side and be bold.
And if you’re wrong, admit it.
Jeff Goins
As a writer, you need to write to your spouse. This can be the toughest part of being a writer. You need to support your spouse through the good times and the bad times. Your writing has to cater to your readers on their sunny days as well as their gloomy days.
So your writing may adjust from time to time to meet their needs. You still write for yourself but you need to keep in mind how your spouse may be feeling today. Their mood may be the exact opposite of your own.
You need to put your heart into your writing. Take out a little bit of logic and sprinkle in some pleasure. Finding the right balance is key to make this a lasting relationship. You do want this to last don’t you?
If this doesn’t work, send them flowers or candy
Really, what are the options? Levi’s or Wranglers?
And you just pick one. It’s one of those life choices.
Harrison Ford
You might have to shower them with flowers, candy, and a bottle of wine. Flatter your reader and make them feel like the most important person in the world. All eyes are on them on this day.
To get more, sometimes you have to give part of yourself. Be vulnerable. Open your heart so they can see the real you.
Sometimes going the extra mile is all you need to do. They need to see the real you and not the jerk you were the other day. From time to time, you’ll make mistakes. Let your reader know when you mess up. After all, you are human and make those silly mistakes.
Do you need to be more Rambo or Casanova in your writing?
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Tom Handy is a top writer on Medium, former Quora writer, and father of two kids. He retired from the Army and sits on several non-profit boards. You can find him on Twitter @tomhandy1 and his publication Life is Like a Game.
