Grown Men Should Never Have A ‘Crush’
It’s a form of self-sabotage to be avoided at all costs.
Guys, has it ever worked out with you and a former ‘crush’?
If so, congratulations. You’re the exception to the rule.
Most guys’ crushes end up tearing their little hearts in two.
Let’s explore why that happens.
You take too much time
If you’ve labelled this woman as your ‘crush’, this means you’ve known her for quite a while without making a move.
This is bad, no matter which way you look at it.
The more you talk to this woman without showing romantic intentions, the more she’ll categorize you as just a friend.
She’ll assume you’re not interested in her or (more likely) too cowardly to act upon your feelings.
This cowardice is a massive turn-off.
It’s almost impossible to spark attraction once she senses it — and that’s why the ‘friendzone’ is notoriously difficult to escape.
If your crush is a woman you often see but never speak to, there’s no immediate danger of being friend-zoned. The bigger threat is being regarded as a creep. That’s how women categorize men who stare at them without ever saying hello.
It’s in your best interests to talk to her NOW, regardless if you get caught gawking at her.
She might be single now, but it doesn’t mean she will be for long. Most likely, you’re not the only guy who dreams of taking her on a date. So, don’t be that guy who kicks himself for missing his chance.
You care too much
It’s naive to believe you should spend ages getting to know a woman before asking her out. Ask her during your first conversation and she’ll be impressed by your boldness. It’ll usually work in your favor to be this assertive.
When you do this, she’s not your ‘crush’ by definition. A ‘crush’ is a romantic interest that plays on your mind. This is a hottie you’ve just met.
You’ll naturally be less emotionally invested in this scenario. This means you’ll be more relaxed. You’ll find it easier to be witty and charismatic. The whole approach will be far smoother.
Guys who ask their ‘crush’ out on a date are nervous wrecks because they’ve built up this moment to be so important. In this case, their nerves shut down their ability to be creative or funny.
Women might find it endearing when a man is nervous in the movies, but that’s not how it plays off in real life.
In reality, they want strong and confident men, not little boys who melt at the thought of inviting them for coffee.
The fact you even label her as your ‘crush’ means you’re pedestalising this woman — and it’ll weird her out to treat her like the final boss of hot girls.
She knows she’s just a normal girl with flaws and insecurities. She wants ment to treat her as such, at least initially.
Guys with ‘crushes’ are probably inexperienced with women
If I used the word ‘crush’ in other dating articles, it’d make my writing easier to read. It’s snappier than ‘woman you’re attracted to’.
But the word ‘crush’ only reminds me of teenage boys in high school.
When men become more experienced with women, they stop developing ‘crushes’.
A pretty face and nice pair of legs no longer leave them spellbound.
It requires physical attraction and an emotional connection to move them this way.
And (hopefully) they’ve learned to ask out attractive women before they develop an obsession.
Acting fast is all it takes to never have a ‘crush’ again.
Here’s the new drill.
You see an attractive woman. You approach her. You flirt and ask her out during the first conversation.
This will save you a lot of mental energy obsessing over ‘crushes’ — and many heartbreaks from taking too long to ask them out.
The more you follow this routine, the easier it gets.
You got this.
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