SELF-IMPROVEMENT

Get Out of the Way — Love is Coming

Day 14, 50 questions for deep self-reflection

This is day 14 of the 50 Questions for Deep Self-Reflection challenge from Know Thyself Heal Thyself created by Diana C.

DAY FOURTEEN: How can you actively train your capacity to receive and give love?

These questions just don’t let up, do they?

I feel like this one comes back to nuances of language and perception once more — I know, total shock, surprise!

For me, I feel like actively train has too much push in it. Just as in the way I don’t like the whole concept of hustle (sorry Gary V), anything that feels like a push is uncomfortable for me. At least, it is now.

I’ll give you a ripe example. When I distanced myself from a toxic family member, I referred to it as ‘yeeting’ the person in question in order to minimize the intensity of the emotion attached.

I yeeted my toxic family. (That’s the best way to say it because to say it in more serious terms gives it more weight than it deserves.) In a moment of saying, “You know what, that’s enough. I’m done,” I began to feel a freedom and a lightness I’d never experienced before. I felt light enough to see myself.

Though it was a powerful experience, ‘yeeting’ still seemed like it had too much push to it, like I was pushing something away rather than embracing something grand.

After a therapy session, I was able to reframe the experience in a way that sits much nicer. Now, I say I quit the family corporation. Instead of an image of pushing something away from me with force, the new image is wrapped in choice and self-care. I have an image of looking around and seeing everyone in the corporation working hard and of me leaving knowing that the corporation is still running but that I no longer need to be a part of it. It sits much nicer and it removes the anger and blame I still held onto.

With all of this in consideration, the question for me becomes:

How can I ALLOW myself to receive and give love?

Much nicer. And I feel like that very shift from push to allowance is my ultimate answer to the question.

How can I ALLOW myself to receive and give love?

• By allowing myself to BE ME
• By being open to different ideas and beliefs
• By being curious, particularly when I feel myself judging or thinking in binary terms of right or wrong (which is simply a reflection of beliefs)
• By seeing what I attract as a reflection of what I’m radiating
• By paying more attention to how I ‘react’ rather than how others ‘act’
• By getting out of the way (in other words, by releasing control on everything I’ve already stated above)

If you are interested in the journey so far — all the days that came before, I’ve collected all the article links here:

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