Get Better At Setting Work Boundaries
Imagine the following:
It’s early Saturday morning, and Brian wanted to jump onto the laptop before the family woke up. He was due to take his daughter to ballet school later and thought he’d squeeze in an hour of work so he didn’t have to do it later in the day.
What was supposed to be a quick email was two hours. When the family started coming down for breakfast, Brian was beavering away on his laptop and was onto his third cup of coffee. It wasn’t even 10.30 am.
When Jo came down around 9 am, she told Brian to clear the kitchen table because she wanted to set it out for the family breakfast. Jo was getting fed up with Brian working out of office hours, especially on the weekends, when he committed to take the kids to different sporting events.
Jo was annoyed that Brian had prioritised work during the weekends and told him he was overworking. She asked him point blank, ‘Brian, are you going to reclaim the amount of time you’re spending at work? Is your boss working too?’
Jo had prior plans with her girlfriends and wanted to leave the house by 11.30 am. She knew Brian would drop Abi at Ballet school and take Jake to football practice. Well, that’s what they’d agreed upon during the week.
Brian was so engrossed in his work that he lost track of time. Jo wasn’t impressed as she made her way to get changed. She knew what was coming — Brian asking Jo to drop the kids off and he’d go pick them up after they finished. However, this time, Jo put her foot down.
Jo agreed to meet her friends at the restaurant for 12 and didn’t want to be late. It was a special occasion for the friends because they’d known each other for 20 years. Jo wanted a break from her family duties; today was her day off.
Jo wanted to look her best, and it would take her a while to get dressed, too, and she didn’t want to rush it because of Brian and his work commitments.
Brian was shocked at Jo’s response and was getting increasingly annoyed. ‘Why doesn’t Jo understand how important this deal is to me and the company?’ It’s not as if I’m asking her to look after the kids for the whole day. It was only to drop them off. He frowned as he paused and decided to take a break and figure it out.
The kids could hear the parents having a loud conversation and didn’t dare go down until it quieted down. Abi and Jake knew the pattern well, especially over the last month. Dad works early in the morning on Saturdays, and Mum has to do the running to and from extracurricular activities.
Find out below what happened to Jo and Brian.
Get Better at Setting at Work Boundaries
Building a sustainable work/life balance is necessary in a fast-paced world. Why? We’re constantly bombarded with distractions, especially from social media and online communication platforms.
Most of us like to think we’re in control, but when did you feel distracted by mobile phone app notifications? How long did it take you to respond to what you thought was a quick 5-minute work message/call/email? All of these can impact our mood and inner and outer well-being.
Therefore, developing a healthy work-life balance is crucial for maintaining your well-being and overall satisfaction in both your professional and personal life.
Recharge To Shift Gears
Unless you’re running a business, you shouldn’t be thinking about work today over the weekend. Why? You can’t fully recharge if your focus is on work.
Those who ‘squeeze’ a bit of work in over the weekend tend to:
❇️Have an average weekend ❇️Not enjoy themselves ❇️Not Recharge completely ❇️Not 100% present for loved ones ❇️Think like a firefighter instead of planning great personal goals ❇️Experience career drift ❇️Lose focus on their long-term plans ❇️Edge closer towards burnout
Please don’t underestimate the last one, because it’s real. We might think we’re in control, but burnout creeps up quickly.
Self Care
If you’ve been reading my work here on Medium, you’ll know I’m a big fan of self-care. Why? It matters at a personal, family, work and societal level. It’s that simple.
You’re doing a great job if you’re taking care of your inner and outer well-being. You’re less likely to take time off work because of stress/illness, and you’ll be thinking of ways to make a difference in the world that you live in.
Self-care doesn’t have to involve candles, massages and sitting in solitude on a mountaintop. It can be anything you want it to be. You’ll find whatever works best for you if you tune into yourself.
Parting Comments
Jo did leave the house on time and was picked up by her friend. Brian grudgingly wrapped up his email and cleared the table after the kids finished breakfast. He took both to their respective activities, and instead of coming back home and missing Jake’s practice, Brian stayed for the duration.
Jo was right. Had he carried on working, he would have missed watching Jake score his first goal of the new season and a big smile on his face. He appreciated his work was important, but he’d have to rethink how he worked and what he worked on.
Working on Saturday mornings might not be a brilliant idea, especially if he agreed to take the kids out. He didn’t want to disappoint his family and annoy Jo. She worked long hours, too, but she got things done without asking for help at the last minute.
Jo looked at her mobile phone several times but hadn’t heard from the kids or Brian. She didn’t want to check up on them either because she might have to ‘fix’ things if Brian wasn’t around to do it.
She felt a sense of relief because the last few weeks were beginning to take their toll on her. Jo appreciated that work was essential to Brian, but he would need to get better at managing it outside working hours.
When Jo got back, the family looked relaxed while watching a movie, and she smiled. She was glad she had put her foot down earlier because she wanted Brian to see how it affected the family. Sometimes, you must give tough love for things to start falling into place.
Thank you for your attention.
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