Poetry Prompt

Food I’ll Only Consume Disguised in a Bottle

I have a pressing matter to discuss — and it’s not grapes

I won’t eat olives Slimy and slippery fruit Adore olive oil

Backstory

When I arrived in South Africa at age 8, certain foods were new to me. I avoided the unfamiliar — avocado, eggplant, and sweet potato held no appeal. Neither had I come across pumpkin, nor gem and Hubbard squashes.

Meat and two veg was the staple diet in Britain in the 50's where food rationing only ended in 1953, eight years after World War II ended.

Cabbage, potatoes, onions, carrots, brussel sprouts, cauliflower, peas, green beans, spinach, turnips, parsnips and celery (I hated the latter three) were standard fare.

Tomatoes (a fruit which Lucy dislikes in their pristine state) were only available in the summer months where a salad comprised the unmentionables, cucumber and round lettuce, decked with Heinz Salad Cream.

I never knew olives existed until I lived here. I can only surmise the Greek and Lebanese immigrant community with their Mediterranean cuisine contributed to their popularity.

Back in Ye Olde Englande, they only sold olive oil in tiny bottles from the chemist, to be warmed and placed in the ear to loosen ear wax!

“The oil extracted from olives, called olive oil, or salad oil, is, with the continentals, in continual request, more dishes being prepared with than without it, we should imagine. With us, it is principally used in mixing a salad, and when thus employed, it tends to prevent fermentation, and is an antidote against flatulency.” — from Mrs Beeton’s Book of Household Management, published in 1861.

Hubby loves olives — I guess because he’s Portuguese.

He’s a useful dustbin when I see those green or black slugs lurking in a salad or flaunting their flesh on top of a pizza!

I don’t have a problem with extra virgin olive oil (EVOO). I buy the local cold-pressed version. Rich in anti-oxidants and healthy fats! Good for the heart and the brain (even if it is a noodle!).

Delicious drizzled on salads or I make a make a dressing with garlic, honey, lemon juice and a dash of ground cumin.

If I don’t have ghee (I make my own!), my second choice is to saute garlic, ginger or spices in olive oil.

I’ll never understand why I won’t eat olives. It can’t be the texture because I love lychees which have a slippery flesh too.

Hang on — I’ve got it!

Lychees are super sweet and juicy whereas olives are bitter and salty.

Thanks for letting me think aloud!

Okay. One last squeeze and I’m done.

I found this joke on the internet:

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a Martini.

The bartender asks, “Olive or twist?”

With that, I thank you for being here.

Lucy The Eggcademic (she/her) came up with this idea, which turned out to be very fruitful.

Because Punch Drunk Cola taught me of a fruit I’d never heard of.