FUN FASHION ADVICE
Fashion Tips for Those Who Don’t Look Good in Grey
Fun things to do when graphite just isn’t your color
Are you struggling to come up with fun things to do in your sweatpants? Adam Robinson
The ‘athleisure’ fashion trend may be here to stay.
According to Tamara Szames, with the research firm NPD Group, before Covid and work-from-home about 25% of clothing purchases fell into the “‘active’ clothing” category. Now that number has risen to more than one-third.
However, the issue of your apparel preferences is not what I am here to discuss.
It doesn’t matter to me whether you like pants that accentuate your camel toe or if you choose to drown your thighs in baggy cotton.
We are going to deliberate on whether the color of your athleisure wear will make you or break you.
Fashion guru Adam Robinson has outlined several options and activities for grey sweatpants. What happens, though, when grey doesn’t “stimulate joy” for you? Or, worse, if it makes you look like the thighs of a turkey that’s never seen anything beyond the wire-walls of its basement enclosure?
Color says a lot about us.
“Grey implies that people are passive, uninvolved and have a lack of energy.” Vanessa Van Edwards
The story of me and grey
I’ve been told I look horrid in grey. Grey? Gray?
“You basically look like that kid who licks the flagpole,” said a friend eyeing me up in the pewter-hued t-shirt I’d bought after hiking Gros Morne. “And then that kid is cold. I mean, like so frigid they turn grey.”
“Don’t you mean blue?” I ask. “They’re so frozen they turn blue?”
“Blue. Grey. Either way, they look bad. BAD! Like how you look when you wear grey.”
When grey is not your color
So, like me, you can’t pull off slate or charcoal or silver like Adam Robinson? Don’t fret.
First off, read this. You’ll get to experience laughing-so-hard-you-shit-in-your-grey-sweatpants. Plus, you’ll learn about fun poses when donning any shade of grey.
Back to us. And whether we can still be cool even if another color looks better covering our arse cheeks.
My only option
When it comes to comfie britches, I opt for my sister’s hand-me-downs. Calvin Kleins speckled in a way that I look a little like the cafe floor after my cousins performed their 1987 interpretive dance involving spice shakers. The one they refer to as The Super Salt and Pepa Smackdown. I talk about it a lot in therapy.
But back to my non-grey joggers. Trackpants, trackies, tracky daks, tracksuit bottoms. Back to my speckled sweatpants.
I can still have loads of fun things in them. Even if they aren’t grey.
Check out the images below. Do you see much of a difference?
PROOF : You can have just as much fun in non-grey sweatpants!
1. The Sexy Saucy Sofa Pout
2. The Mysterious Elderly Traveller
3. The Cheeky Constipated Chappy
4. The Pregnant Prince
5. “Oops! I didn’t realize you were taking a picture!”
Fashion Tips
As you can see from my super chic photos, I am indeed the person to consult about athlesireure wear trends. I am wise, fun, and obviously in vogue.
Here’s my very serious advice. A point of view for which my fans usually pay big bucks. But I am feeling rather charitable and will offer it as a one-time freebie offer.
Wear whatever the eff you want.
Pick out “soft trousers” in a color you adore. Wear them with pride. And joy. Don’t let it be a struggle. And don’t worry if it isn’t grey. Or gray.
©Jennifer J. McDougall 2022
Here’s some other crap I’ve written.
