Endless Emotions Because We Are Humans
February prompt for a Journey of Life and a personal revision of the matter
I can’t think about an earthly world inhabited by humans with no emotional skills.
E-motion derives from Latin and means to move out, to express. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, emotion is a “conscious mental reaction (such as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feeling usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body”.
We are all relatable with that, aren’t we?
Quite strange to say, psychology started to consider emotions in their general intelligence tests research only after Dr. Daniel Goleman pointed out the matter in the late ´90s. As if we psychologists knew all about emotions, but didn’t take them seriously into consideration for trying and validate testing (*). At least this was my experience as a graduate of Clinical Psychology in 1989 at an Italian University.
The movie industry got caught in the affair lately, and you can find suggestions about developing Emotional Intelligence through films like Inside Out, Wonder, Coco, Birdman, In Pursuit of Happyness, Juno, and so on.
A question for you. Does it make any sense that the more we define people through the lens of emotional intelligence, the more we recognize how much our human species is deeply disturbed?
Emotions are the oily motor being in pain in our society.
Do you see any teaching programs in schools adapted to develop empathy and positive emotions in kids?
What’s really changed for us since we knew something more about these fallacious black holes in our emotional backpacks?
Difficulties in expressing adequate emotions through behavior are the basis of all personality disorders. What if I told you 90% of the population I met in prison as a psychologist over ten years was affected by this kind of problem?
Emotions are a hard matter.
How much is the society in which we live responsible for our incapacity of expressing ourselves in an unharming way through emotions?
What is Emotional Intelligence?
According to Dr. Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence (E.I.) is a person’s ability to manage their feelings so that those feelings are expressed appropriately and effectively.
Goleman focuses on five abilities to enlighten the matter around emotional intelligence:
- self-awareness
- self-regulation
- motivation
- empathy
- social skills
In other words, the most important aspects involved in emotionally intelligent people are the ability to perceive, use, understand, manage, and handle emotions.
For those of you who may not know the work of this American psychologist, I linked a couple of his books below.
Actually, emotions had been studied earlier on, but Daniel Goleman spread the knowledge of the matter worldwide, gaining the attention of a wider public.
What’s going on now
Parents are stressed about their economical issues, they can’t decide where to live, or how long they can spend their time with their children. Children’s education is delegated to third parties. Materialistic values substitute the time presence of busy parents. Can you relate? Has anything changed after two years of a claustrophobic forced period shutting down well-known habits, behaviors, and routines, and pushing on a reset button?
When it comes to emotions, as an expert in the field, I have the perception something extremely wrong is happening on one side, while, at the same time, a newly raised awareness is developing among some people.
The fact. A reel showed up on my Instagram account, not relatable to writing or psychology. A man, who proclaimed himself as suffering from depression (not clear if he was officially diagnosed or it was a self-diagnosis) shows a solution out of the dark tunnel.
He had a chat with ChatGPT, he writes. And reading the answers and going further on in a deep conversation with this recently found new friend, he started crying and releasing his pain. The story told to him resonated with his suffering. He found the solution to his existential dilemma through an A.I. device.
I won’t give the reference here because I, unfortunately, did not save the link. I promise you this story is totally true.
Are you in shock? I am. Especially after said man suggested to his audience to do the same, and use ChatGPT to find a cure for their emotional struggles.
Are you kidding, man? Robots substituting humans in mental health care…what next? If you’ve already fallen in love with the artificial thing I’m sorry to deceive you: I don’t agree at all. Do I need to explain my reasons? Maybe I should. Maybe another time, in another article, when the alert system in my brain will have regained control over an urging rage feeling that would make me want to throw this computer out of the window.
New humans. On the other side, a lot of sensible down-to-earth humans have taken responsibility for their lives and have decided to play a different game. They’ve decided to go through home-schooling. They’ve decided to go back to natural lifestyles and rhythms, keeping themselves engaged in a more vibrant life.
The United States has the highest number of homeschooled kids worldwide, with an increased rate of +6% in 2022. Homeschooling statistics show that an estimated 90% of parents in the UK were educating their children at home at the start of 2021. (1)
Home gardening and crop growing have become the basis for renewal in the creation of meaning in nutrition education. From small choices, applicable in bigger cities’ contexts, like vertical gardens and slow food, to more radical decisions, involving a rural lifestyle, nature is regaining an important role in the maintenance of a harmonious and balanced life. Emotional well-being approves. (2)
Re-connecting with our human emotions
We’ve got plenty of opportunities to become Emotional Intelligent human beings. We deserve it, and we need it as a species to prevent our extinction.
If we don’t want to disappear or be inglobed into a fake machinery device actuating as god/gold, this is the time to go deep into our knowledge of our emotions.
Knowing our emotions means knowing our behaviors better, so as to cope and take some resolution on the dysfunctional ones.
Taking the time to let our emotions become a real part of our life can help us live better and more satisfactory lives as human beings.
Please, tell me, would you use ChatGPT as your personal therapist?
Founts of reference (1) https://insights.gostudent.org/en/homeschooling-around-the-world
(2) https://www.activif.com/what-is-home-backyard-gardening-importance-benefits
(3) Daniel Goleman, “ Emotional Intelligence — Why it can matter more than IQ”, 1995
(4) Daniel Goleman, “Working With Emotional Intelligence”, 1998
(*) Existing tests on Emotional Intelligence, like the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT), are not considered standard IQ tests in that their items do not have objectively correct responses.
Thanks to Sahil Patel for suggesting this prompt and writing his beautiful post.
I loved this article from Shubha Apte
