avatarJohnny Silvercloud

Summary

The article emphasizes the inefficacy of white people using the "I have a Black friend" defense to deflect accusations of racism, highlighting the need for white people to acknowledge and address systemic racism beyond personal relationships.

Abstract

The piece, titled "White People: Stop Saying You 'Have a Black Friend'," critiques the common white defensive response to discussions on racism, particularly the "I have a Black friend" argument. It underscores that individual friendships do not absolve one from participating in or supporting systemic racism. The author asserts that racism is a systemic issue created and maintained by white people, who must actively listen to and engage with Black perspectives to effect positive change. The article also points out the predictable sociological responses from white people when confronted with race issues, including the defensive mechanism known as white fragility. It calls for a focus on actions and subconscious biases rather than personal intentions, and it challenges the notion that personal relationships with Black individuals serve as a shield against charges of racism.

Opinions

  • Racism is a systemic issue, not merely personal animosity, and requires a systemic approach to dismantle.
  • Having a Black friend does not exempt an individual from perpetuating racist attitudes or systems.
  • The "I have a Black friend" defense is a form of white fragility and serves to derail meaningful conversations about racism.
  • White people, as the primary socializers and beneficiaries of systemic racism, have a responsibility to actively combat it.
  • The article criticizes the tendency to tokenize Black individuals as a way to deflect criticism of racist behaviors or attitudes.
  • The author suggests that white people often prioritize their comfort over engaging with the intellectual and emotional perspectives of Black people.
  • The piece calls for white people to move beyond defensiveness and focus on recognizing and changing the actions that support systemic racism.

White People: Stop Saying You “Have a Black Friend”

Your Ebony Shield will not protect you from your own stupidity.

A Black man sitting high on the Lincoln Memorial, Washington D.C. during the March of Washington 2020 protest, Aug 28th 2020 Photo Credit: Johnny Silvercloud

We need to talk

Discussing racism with white people is the final frontier in any civil rights progression concerning racism. Only when white people listen to Black people does positive change occur. Our modern day Civil Rights Era, Civil Rights 2.0, will need the same thing. It makes sense, because after all, racism is their baby. It’s their creation. They own it.

It’s similar to how Sony, Apple or Microsoft works; only they can fix it because they created the operating system.

Because white people are mostly socialized (by other whites, naturally) to try to pretend racism doesn’t exist, most honest discussions on how racism works get really awkward. The responses white people have to racism discussions have been well documented (whiteness studies, sociology) and are hilariously predictable. The hilarity comes from the fact that it’s not often that anyone ever thinks about how so many white people who don’t know each other, from all walks of life have the SAME SOCIOLOGICAL RESPONSE to race relations. While I could touch up on all of the responses whites have concerning race talk, I’m going to dedicate this to one of my favorites: the “I have a Black friend” defense.

You need to know how racism works

When white people say they “have a Black friend.”

Long story short — saying you have a Black friend doesn’t mean you aren’t capable of supporting or perpetuating racism. Of course, this may confuse you. Allow me to inform you now that those who suffer from racism aren’t talking about a mere dislike or personal hatred. We — those who suffer from racism as well as those who study these things— are talking about institutional racism. This is why I address racism as if it’s a system of some sort. Racism isn’t understood as some Saturday morning cartoon villain personality trait that’s done by something who is “evil” for the sake of being “evil”.

White person being defensive: “I have a Black friend.”

Me, unfettered: “So do I!”

A lot of this defense mechanism mess that white people do (called white fragility in whiteness studies) comes from the notion of being evil, or the bad guy. From there the white person gets defensive, because no one ever wants to think of themselves as an evil-doer. Here’s the deal though: every person who was ever evil in world history never realized how they were evil at all. In their minds, they are all justified in their actions, just like you. Once again, life isn’t a Saturday morning cartoon with silly villains who want to be evil just to be evil. In real life, the bad guys think they are the good guys and that’s how they continue to do what they do. So in race discussions the smart guys are not concerned with the notions of “good and evil”. We are not concerned with logically flawed binaries. We are concerned with

1. the subconscious mental priming process, and;

2. ACTIONS taken.

If you, the white person, can stop thinking about being personally insulted (no one’s calling you evil, no one gives a piss about that) and can focus on what you can do and what you can support, maybe we can get somewhere.

The exception versus the rule

Black woman present at the March of Washington 2020 protest, Aug 28th 2020 Photo Credit: Johnny Silvercloud

One problem with the “I have a Black friend” claim is the simple fact that you respecting one doesn’t equal respect across the board for all. It’s possible for a person to totally piss on a general population while plucking out single favorites to save. I can even testify that I was once the black friend of a racist white guy who hated black people as a general whole (and I got stories to writes about that). It was interesting to observe this phenomenon; while I tried to maybe help him out by being a stellar example of a black person to break his bias, all he did was place me on a pedestal while still pissing on the rest.

It actually made things worse. I became the very hard standard to follow; any Black guy had to be at the “Johnny” standard or else. Scores of white friends of his can be a below-average Joe, while the Black friend had to be an elite, perceived as best-of-his-race, superhuman. Even further were microaggressions like the claim, “I don’t think of you as Black at all” as if that form of erasure was a compliment. Instead of representing the whole as a great Black friend, all of a sudden that doesn’t matter because I don’t count. In his mind I was the exception (you’re awesome bro) versus the rule (they’re all thugs).

Thinking that you cannot be racist because you have a Black friend is like thinking you can’t be sexist because you have a sister, mother, girlfriend or wife. It’s a bit asinine to claim when you see this in perspective, and I hope you can see it now.

If I told you that “I can’t be violent” because “I have a pacifist friend”, you’d call me an idiot, and you’d be right. And that’s exactly what you look like with this “Black friend” mess.

The reason why Ebony Shield is so effective, is because using minorities to anathematize and ignore vulnerable peoples of the United States seems to justify the said behavior of demonizing those vulnerable people.

The Philando Castile protest in Tucson, AZ. July 10th, 2016. Photo Credit: Johnny Silvercloud

If you are a direct supporter of white supremacy which include support of policies and politics that piss on Black people then there’s another use for your mythological Black friend. I call this phenomenon, specifically if you are anti-Black, having pets. A pet (tokenism) is a person you use to specifically shield yourself from criticism you rightfully earned.

I’ve discussed this in-depth as the Ebony Shield tactic, as well as pointing out the flaws in being that pet. Usually the pet would be someone who either supports the self-hating ideology or is someone who is silent, passive, who wishes to turn a blind eye to racism as a whole. Both of these tropes have one job — that’s to ensure white comfort is unscathed.

Think about the fact that even the racist mass murderer Dylan Roof had a “Black friend”.

Conclusion

I always wondered if I’m the Black guy summoned to mind if a white friend of mine ever asserted they have a Black friend in the face of critique of their racist behaviors. I’m shocked that I never received a phone call or text to inform me of any of my white friends in peril. Our essence is frequently summoned, but never our voices. Never our minds.

Strange; it’s almost like white people find more utility in mere social proximity to physical Black bodies than they do the intellectual fortitude, patience and emotional health of Black people.

It’s almost like we are all just dark-skinned husks to claim as an infinite get-out-of-racism-acknowledgement card. Like we are just, things. Objects. Like a tool to use. Like a pen, hammer… horse… or slave.

White people: Stop doing this. We are not your Ebony Shields.

Black Friend
White Fragility
Toxic Whiteness
Racism
Anti Racism
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