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id? What if they think you don’t like them? What if they’re upset? What if they don’t like you and won’t read your stuff and you’ll never get anywhere or do anything and why do you even bother? Why did you do that? </i>WHY DID YOU DO THAT? IT’S WRONG IT’S WRONG IT’S WRONG!!!! — <a href="undefined">Cee Arr</a> quote from <a href="https://ceearr33.medium.com/claps-stress-me-out-2de749b29a9">Claps Stress Me Out</a></p></blockquote><h2 id="3352">I have to go to personal therapy about this “clapping anxiety”.</h2><p id="3e54">I’m practicing being more mentally healthy…for now, I’m leaning towards mirroring claps. The ‘you give me 1 and give you 1’ kind of thing especially for responses.</p><p id="bca6">I am aware that claps are a vanity ego thing. Reading the content and commenting is a lot more important to algorithms. I pray to the algorithm Gods, who know that clapping for content without reading it is meaningless…they can’t be fooled🤣</p><p id="658a">Once, I got a notification that someone clapped for all of my stories in less than 5 minutes. Ha …Why did they do that?</p><p id="351c">It’s as meaningless as that ‘follow-for-follow’ on medium. What’s the point of followers if they don’t read your content. I wrote a little about that here:</p><div id="af98" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/who-needs-100-followers-by-tomorrow-c8b0c2582097"> <div> <div> <h2>Who needs 100 Followers by Tomorrow?!?</h2> <div><h3>I will help you: 5 genuine ways to get followers</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*jVekctxPt4AhLZoU)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><p id="bc7a">People tend to think more claps mean better content but that’s not true.</p><p id="2771" type="7">“Every monkey has their mate🤣”</p><p id="2a29">Then there are people like me, an introvert- extravert, with tons of acquaintances and 1- 2 real friends.</p><p id="e7b7">Ultimately people can NOT rely on other people to validate them. The coolest people truly don’t care about what other people think. Those are the kinds of people I interact with daily …that’s my family and the other 2 are my friends.</p><p id="6e4f">Side note: If you follow me, some of you already know that I tend to leave long-ass comments if I love what you wrote. So, this whole story

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is a reply to <a href="undefined">Lindo Shandu</a> comment to me to “Don’t forget to NOT clap at all when you don’t feel like it.”</p><h2 id="45dd">More from me</h2><div id="ead8" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/comment-etiquette-e27689a9ad72"> <div> <div> <h2>Comment Etiquette</h2> <div><h3>Do you wanna understand or do you just wanna BITCH?</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*R2kOO6sB25GjN9pW)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="183f" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/breaking-news-illumination-publication-accepts-already-published-stories-311f87097183"> <div> <div> <h2>Breaking News: ILLUMINATION Publication Accepts Already Published Stories!</h2> <div><h3>This is amazing news for Medium writers.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*MrmoQcuMWv6KgHmJ)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="51d0" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-have-to-teach-you-a-lesson-875f01d99fd1"> <div> <div> <h2>I Have to Teach You a Lesson</h2> <div><h3>I forgot I wasn’t wearing any underwear.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*pABchdnMalTQqLNO)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="d90f" class="link-block"> <a href="https://jajarequa.medium.com/story-index-f31522b4108c"> <div> <div> <h2>Story Index</h2> <div><h3>Topic lists of stories I write</h3></div> <div><p>jajarequa.medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*[email protected])"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

Don’t forget to NOT clap at all

When you Don’t Feel Like It

Dealing with my clapping anxiety

Claps give me anxiety.

On Medium, there’s a clapping icon on the left or the bottom of your device. When you hold it down you can give up to 50 claps in appreciation of the writer's content. Yesterday a writer highlighted several lines to my story, commented 4 times but what did I notice?

He left no claps

The 2nd person gave me 5 claps and immediately I thought my piece sucked. I was too far down the mental rabbit hole of thinking my writing sucks to even notice the 3rd person’s 50 claps.

WTF….something was wrong with me.

I’m completely aware that this ‘clapping vanity thing’ that I have has to do with feeling like I’m not enough. Like that heart❤ or like button 👍 on other platforms, the number of claps is a metaphor for me feeling that love. The love I should be feeling for myself.

Lindo was my mental health coach yesterday. I wrote to him:

My clapping anxiety is truly pathetic and definitely sick.. but I have anxiety even about shit I don’t care about. It’s that overthinking thing I do but I know I’m fucked up and need to change.

So when Lindo Shandu replied to a comment about my clapping anxiety, I totally agree with him.

He said:

“Don’t forget to NOT clap at all when you don’t feel like it or when you feel the piece you’ve just read is not worthy of your claps”

I don’t clap when I don’t feel like it anymore….I’m an ‘on or off’ person. I mostly clap 50 or not clap at all. That’s because I’m an overthinker, So thinking about how many claps I give someone stresses me out.

15 claps? 20 claps? 30 claps? What if that’s the wrong amount? What if you did a different amount to what you thought you did? What if they think you don’t like them? What if they’re upset? What if they don’t like you and won’t read your stuff and you’ll never get anywhere or do anything and why do you even bother? Why did you do that? WHY DID YOU DO THAT? IT’S WRONG IT’S WRONG IT’S WRONG!!!! — Cee Arr quote from Claps Stress Me Out

I have to go to personal therapy about this “clapping anxiety”.

I’m practicing being more mentally healthy…for now, I’m leaning towards mirroring claps. The ‘you give me 1 and give you 1’ kind of thing especially for responses.

I am aware that claps are a vanity ego thing. Reading the content and commenting is a lot more important to algorithms. I pray to the algorithm Gods, who know that clapping for content without reading it is meaningless…they can’t be fooled🤣

Once, I got a notification that someone clapped for all of my stories in less than 5 minutes. Ha …Why did they do that?

It’s as meaningless as that ‘follow-for-follow’ on medium. What’s the point of followers if they don’t read your content. I wrote a little about that here:

Who needs 100 Followers by Tomorrow?!?

I will help you: 5 genuine ways to get followers

medium.com

People tend to think more claps mean better content but that’s not true.

“Every monkey has their mate🤣”

Then there are people like me, an introvert- extravert, with tons of acquaintances and 1- 2 real friends.

Ultimately people can NOT rely on other people to validate them. The coolest people truly don’t care about what other people think. Those are the kinds of people I interact with daily …that’s my family and the other 2 are my friends.

Side note: If you follow me, some of you already know that I tend to leave long-ass comments if I love what you wrote. So, this whole story is a reply to Lindo Shandu comment to me to “Don’t forget to NOT clap at all when you don’t feel like it.”