Don’t Ask Her Out to a Date If You Won’t Pay Her Bill

Yes, she’s not obligated to pay a dime.

I was mortified to see men taking up a new culture of asking women to pay their share of what they ate or drank on a date.

I know my reaction may come off as hypocrisy because I’m a feminist (advocate for equity).

Women want equal rights. We should exhibit that equality in every aspect of our culture, right?

Maybe!

We still have a long way to go. Some men get bruised egos when women do things they normally do.

I’ve had men turn down my request when I asked them out. These men think I was being manly by asking them to go on a date with me.

One specifically said he doesn’t see women who ask men out as attractive. In other words, he thinks she’s desperate and lacks self-worth.

Another said it’s humiliating for a woman to take the lead in a relationship.

The ones that do agree to go out with, expect I fuck them at the end of the date.

After a couple of unpleasant strikes, I stopped initiating dates. I prefer flirting and giving him the green lights to do the honors.

Chivalry is not dead, and romance is still a thing

Chivalry is gender-neutral. Opening car doors, pulling out chairs, and helping women with their coats are examples of chivalry.

These behaviors are romantic and would be beneficial to everyone if both men and women participated in them for the benefit of both genders.

It gets condescending when they’re only made by men, for women.

When I have a crush on a man, I show him my feeling in everything I do. I will damn all cultural expectations on what women do or should not do.

I will go the extra mile to prove I’m deserving of his time and attention. Yes, I get deep down into the nickel of love and build the attraction through my actions.

I equally expect the men who are into me to do the same. I love a man who knows how to woo a woman. Who can turn a woman on just by looking at her or doing things with her without touching intimate parts of her body.

If you find me attractive, you should damn the rules and show me why I should be with you and not someone else.

If you show me things I see in everyone else, what makes you different from the rest?

Our social dynamic of what is acceptable among gender is evolving and commendable.

Feminist movements are encouraging more men to be equal partners in relationships. Men are beginning to dumb the idea that masculinity should be arrogant, irrepressible, and dominating.

Millennials now consider what’s physically and emotionally acceptable to women in their relationship without conferring to social standards.

The old chivalry rule of putting women and children first, which places men’s lives at risk, have been shoved aside.

We are actually getting to a time where equal rights can be felt in society.

But why does this not apply to dating rules? Why are women uncomfortable proposing to men?

Why women shouldn’t pay for their date

Unfortunately, we cannot change decades of discrimination against women overnight.

Even with the evolution of gender equality, women are still denied autonomy over their bodies.

Most women in developing countries are denied the right to choose whether to have sex with their partner, use contraception or receive medical care.

The lack of physical autonomy threatened the safety of the women.

It is a violation of the fundamental human rights of women and girls that exacerbates inequalities and perpetuates violence based on gender discrimination.

Also, in some traditions, women are sold out in marriage. Women have always been regarded as a price to men.

Society objectifies women’s bodies. We are seen as sex symbols for men women — a tool for men’s amusement.

We see this all the time on tv, media, and ads. A female model wearing a bikini on a beauty magazine’s cover will attract more readers than a male model in a corporate outfit.

Sexual objectifying women leads to unpleasant feelings of shame and anxiety. It reduces a woman’s worth.

We must first fix what’s broken

If men want women to start paying their bills, we must completely fix the discrimination against women in every aspect of our culture.

Currently, women enjoy just 75 percent of the legal rights of men. We should be paid equally as men for the same job.

Stop giving women as a price to men. We should have the right to choose if we want to marry or not and who we want to marry. We don’t want anyone telling us when the right age is for marriage.

Stop objectifying our bodies. We want the full right to do whatever we want with our body — no tampon taxing, no abortion laws, and no career limitation.

Stop contradicting what women say. When women initiate dates, men take it that she’s desperate or asking to get laid. We want our boundaries respected. Take our words for what they are.

Until we arrive at the place where women have equal right to do what men do without being chastised for their actions, women should not be obligated to pay for dates they did not initiate.

And for the records guys, we do not like most men we go on dates with.

Because men are persistent, some won’t accept “no” for an answer when they want you. So women are forced to go on dates with such men out of curiosity or boredom.

However, if you are the type of man who insists a woman pays her share, then tell her that when you ask her out. She can decide if she wants to go out with you or not.

It’s cheap and cowardly when men hide under the umbrella of feminism to avoid their responsibility.

Equality should be practiced in all aspects of our lives. If a man asks a woman out, he should pay the bills. And if a woman asks a man out, she should pay the bills.

We don’t mind paying for our dinners, but men need to set the structure that is conducive for women to express themselves freely without prejudice.

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