Dive Into: What Is Stoicism?
Linking Philosophy To The Body
What This Article Will Give You:
- The Definition of Stoicism — A Shallow Dive
- How I Was Introduced To Stoicism — A Personal Story
- How Often I Study Stoicism — Consistency Matters
- How Stoicism Affected Me— 6 Takeaways
- Linking Stoicism To Body Wisdom — Everything Comes Back to The Body
What Is Stoicism?
Definition 1: A person who can endure pain or hardship without showing their feelings or complaining — Oxford Dictionary
Definition 2: Stoicism teaches the development of self-control and fortitude as a means of overcoming destructive emotions; the philosophy holds that becoming a clear and unbiased thinker allows one to understand the universal reason (logos). — Wikipedia
Both definitions 1 & 2 are essentially the same, but definition 2 wholly describes what stoicism means to me. I would add that Stoicism is questioning ourselves, our beliefs, our thoughts, our habits, our knowledge, and our way of life. Stoicism is not mainstream; it is not consumed widely. Stoicism moves in the opposite direction of where society is headed.
How Was I Introduced to Stoicism?
Serendipity led me to “The Daily Stoic” by Ryan Holiday, a book focused on stoicism. I was inconspicuously exposed to stoicism — which I humorously find stoic-like. The book rested upon the Chief Technology Officer’s desk at a tech company I worked for in the past. The book stuck out to me like a yellow balloon in a black sky. I remember I kept peering over at the book on his desk; it was like the book was calling out for me.
A year after I left the company, I still remembered the book’s title and bought it. Serendipity blessed me with ample fortune because this book has transformed my life. As I reflect, noticing that book on the CTO’s desk was the best thing that happened to me at that job and one of the best things that happened in my life.
How Often Do I Study Stoicism?
I study stoicism daily — for the most part. I read the Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday borderline religiously; it is my secondary spiritual guide to live a better life. The book is filled with tremendous knowledge that will challenge you in a multitude of ways to do better — in all matters of your life experience.
For the last four years, I’ve been studying stoicism. I must say, the change did not take root in my life more so until my third year of studying the subject; the first two years acted more like an intake for knowledge, and the last two years have been a dual combination of the intake of knowledge and the application of knowledge.
It’s not easy to obliterate habits, beliefs, and thinking you adopted since you were a mere child. It takes generous time of reprogramming yourself to think differently — to think better. To think differently, you must question differently.
Be Consistent
My personal development didn’t occur overnight; it took years to arrive where I am today (and notice the changes), and I still have a long way to go. But after continually ingesting daily meditations over and over again, one thing is for sure: the stoic meditations started to take root and display themselves in my daily behaviors, thinking patterns, habits, and interactions with myself and others.
Consistency matters. Each day provides you another opportunity to learn, grow, and evolve into a more defined, more intelligent, more kind, and more wise human being.
How Has Stoicism Affected Me?
Six things have dramatically changed for me since I have become a student of stoicism:
- I’m less emotional; I’m driven less by my emotions
- I take fewer things personally; it is more challenging to offend me
- My expectations of others are usually low
- I’m reminded to embrace minimalism continuously
- I continue to question everything
- I monitor my desires more effectively
1 — I’m Less Emotional
The month of February in “The Daily Stoic” is dedicated to emotions. But when I take a step back, the whole book is about becoming less emotionally attached to:
- Things
- People
- Outcomes
- And Situations
2 — I Take Fewer Things Personally
One takeaway — that will be drilled into your being — from stoicism is not to take things personally. Taking things personally is one of the most unproductive things you can do with your time, energy, and thoughts. Stoicism dives in on this subject constantly — like a drill that never ends — and I think this is the case because so many of us let our emotions get in the way of living a productive life.
How many of you still recall an interaction or something someone said to you, and you still get a rise from it?
I shrug a lot of things off these days. It takes more to get a reaction out of me. I even find it difficult to tell if someone is insulting me at times. Looking back, there are many instances where an apathetic shrug might not have been a realistic response; however, I’ve learned to care less about things, situations, and people’s actions that I shouldn’t care about (a simple and effective way to conduct life). No, I’m not a master of my emotions, but each day I’m making progress.
3 — My Expectations of Others Are Usually Low
When your expectations are always in the sky, you find yourself feeling disappointed — often. I have found that lowering my expectations for others has decreased my cortisol levels and increased my inner peace.
“We can’t blame other people for making us feel stressed or frustrated any more than we can blame them for our jealousy. The cause is within us. They’re just the target.” — The Daily Stoic p 88
“The cause of my irritation is not in this person but in me.”
People will fail us for the rest of our lives, and this is okay. There will be countless times we fail other people, too. The best people are the ones that realize this truth and don’t hold it against you because guess what? We’re all human! And a lot of the things we let bother us are mostly small stuff.
“Don’t sweat the small stuff.” — Richard Carlson
Remember To Lower Your Expectations For Yourself, Too I realized I needed to lower some expectations for myself. As Nathan L. Senter states, “We don’t treat anyone as badly as we treat ourselves.” Relinquish the unrealistic expectations you have for yourself and watch your life become a little easier to bear, a little less stressful, and a little bit more enjoyable.
Expectations are tricky; they can cause personal growth, but they also can cause unnecessary pain when they aren’t met.
4—I Continue To Embrace Minimalism
I embraced minimalism as a kid (I consider myself a hybrid adopter of minimalism — not too much stuff, but just enough), well before coming across stoicism. But stoicism continuously reminds me not to get caught up in the accumulation of things. It is too easy to forget that materialism is nothing but an empty pursuit in a world obsessed with things.
Two of my favorite passages relating to material possessions are:
“Don’t set your heart on so many things,” says Epictetus. Focus, Prioritize. Train your mind to ask: Do I need this thing? What will happen if I do not get it? Can I make do without it? The answers to these questions will help you relax, help you cut out all the needless things that make you busy — too busy to be balanced or happy.” — The Daily Stoic p 69
“So, concerning the things we pursue and for which we vigorously exert ourselves, we owe this consideration — either there is nothing useful in them, or most aren’t useful. Some of them are superfluous, while others aren’t worth that much. But we don’t discern this and see them as free when they cost us dearly.” — The Daily Stoic p 75
5 — I Question Everything
Stoicism belabors the tasks of questioning your beliefs, character, philosophies, and behaviors.
Who are you really? Are you compiled of your own ideas and beliefs, or ideas you’ve adopted along the way from others?
As a new habit formed with the study of stoicism, I’m more cautious about adopting the ideas of others without question. I also don’t need others to adopt my beliefs to brush my ego.
So many of us easily adopt mainstream messages because, well, we are taught to do this from the first day of kindergarten, on top of adopting our family’s values, ideas, and beliefs starting from birth.
6—I Monitor My Desires More Effectively
Desires will run you ragged. Desires can take you out. Desires can place you off track. Desires, unmanaged, are destructive. If you want nothing, you have everything. You’re in control, and no one has leverage over you. Not businesses, advertisements, societal “norms,” people, or desires.
Stoicism challenges its pupils never to cease questioning their desires because whatever you desire, you are a servant to.
Linking Stoicism To Body Wisdom
All the things we subject ourselves to often lead to pain — mentally, emotionally, financially, and spiritually. This pain often leads to stress, which evolves into physical pain that our bodies learn to adapt to, but we needn’t introduce our bodies to more pain. However, human beings are often addicted to pain without realizing they are.
Things that bring us unnecessary pain:
- Impressing others with urgency
- Living above our financial means
- Taking things personally
- Internalizing bitterness
- Harboring unforgiveness
- Presenting our inauthentic selves to the world
- Unrealistic expectations of ourselves and others
- Resisting the truth of who people are
- Allowing emotions to rule our lives, habits, decisions, and actions
- Taking offense at every big and little situation and interaction
- Materialism, hoarding, and the accumulation of things
“[…] in a society of ever-bigger houses and ever more possessions: [..] there’s a hidden cost to all of that accumulating.” — The Daily Stoic p 75
Some of the bodily pain humans deal with often is caused by prioritizing the wrong things [read the list above again]. Furthermore, some of our bodily pain is exasperated by prioritizing the wrong things.
Remember your mental, spiritual, emotional, and financial well-being and health are all linked to one thing: your physical health. If you change your mind, you will change the quality of your life, which for some people equates to less pain.
Final Note
Know any other great books, videos, or reads on stoicism? Drop your recommendations in the comments; I’d love to check more similar reads out.
