SELF-IMPROVEMENT

Declutter Your Experience

Day 33, 50 questions for deep self-reflection

This is day 33 of the 50 Questions for Deep Self-Reflection challenge from Know Thyself Heal Thyself created by Diana C.

DAY THIRTY-THREE: How can you find out if what you’re holding on to is worth the space it's taking up?

Is this a trick?

I feel like this is a trick question. I feel like if I am going to ask myself if something is worth the space it’s taking up, then I already know the answer is no. I feel like if something takes up space and I enjoy it and I’m happy with it, then I’m not going to ask the question about if it’s worth the space it’s taking up.

So the short answer to this question of how can I find out if what I’m holding on to is worth the space it’s taking up, is to ask myself first, am I asking this question at all? Because if I am, then the answer is no, it’s not worth the space it’s taking up. That’s the simple answer. But things are rarely so simple. I mean, they can be, but we’re humans. We don’t like to simplify. We like to make things as complicated as possible. So let’s complicate it.

If this question only relates to the stuff that is not worth the space that it is taking up, then the question becomes, why the hell am I holding on to those things? So I’m going to ask myself:

What am I still holding on to that I already know is not worth the space I’m allowing it to take up?

What am I choosing to hold on to and why am I choosing to hold on to it? It’d be nice if this part had a simple answer. It’d be nice if I could instantly say, “These are the things I’m holding on to that are taking up space. These are things I need to let go of.” But the problem with that is awareness is 95% of the journey and I am quite good, I believe, at letting go of those things once I know what they are. So I’m in a state at the moment of lacking the awareness of what it is that I am holding on to.

But this is why I go to therapy to talk with my therapist about what has come up during the fortnight, what things have shown themselves. And this is why I allow intuition to drive our sessions just as he does, which is fantastic. This is why I unpack so deeply and so efficiently. At least, I think I do. Because I don’t want to hold on to these things. Once I’m aware of them, that’s when I can let them go.

So this question turned out to be quite useful.

How can I find out if what I’m holding on to is worth the space it’s taking up?

The real question is:

How can I find out what I’m holding on to?

• By continuing my therapy sessions.
• By exploring my own actions and reactions.
• By connecting with my characters because as a writer, my characters bring parts of me out that I might not yet be aware of or be ready to acknowledge — it’s very therapeutic.
• By knowing that, if I’m not yet aware that I’m holding on to something that’s taking up space, that means I haven’t yet reached the awareness that I need to be able to acknowledge it and that’s okay.
• By being open to intrusive thoughts and instead of trying to control them, query them.

If you are interested in the journey so far — all the days that came before, I’ve collected all the article links here:

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