CULTURE|PSYCHOLOGY
Confessions of a Former Massage Therapist
Clothing, judgment, and the weight of the world are a few things that people try to set aside inside a typical massage room
I used to be a licensed massage therapist for more than ten years. I can still hardly believe some of the stories I’ve heard from my clients, as well as co-workers.
I have worked at a few legitimate, upscale spas that provide various massage and facial services to men and women.
I’d say that about 40% of my clients were men and 60% were women.
Men rarely talked during their massage time, whereas at least half of the women had a hard time relaxing unless they talked.
I knew I gave better massages when people didn’t talk. I would talk as well, which took away some of my focus on their ailments. Sometimes I told them this, but it didn’t matter.
I came to learn that talking was part of their therapy, especially for those who were prone to anxiety.
It amazes me how much people can reveal to total strangers — things that they don’t feel comfortable saying to their close friends or family.
Sometimes, I felt like a priest who was listening to people’s confessions.
One of the biggest secrets told to me by a woman was that she had an abortion earlier that day and did not tell her husband.
She told me that she would never tell him.
She was catholic and felt bad about it, but her husband was a bipolar schizophrenic who had stopped taking his meds- again.
They were on the verge of divorce after he’d cheated on her several months prior during a manic episode. They had sex once the month before, which is when she became pregnant.
They already had two teenage children together and she knew that she did not want anymore, especially with him.
It blew my mind that I knew this personal information that she didn’t dare share with many others. Also, it touched my heart that she felt comfortable enough to tell me.
Some clients have revealed family secrets, such as favoritism and nepotism, that have caused them to have more success than others, and it seemed to make them feel some degree of guilt.
I had one woman tell me how she was falling out of love with her boyfriend of 20 years and falling in love with a woman she met online.
She ended up breaking up with the guy, who was actually okay with her decision, and a year later, she married the woman she met online.
She had been my client for about four years. She was a quiet, hard-working social worker who didn’t even use to talk during her sessions. I did not see that one coming.
Another woman, who didn’t used to talk during our sessions, broke down one day about her cruel, verbally abusive, and manipulative boss.
The woman worked for a real estate company. She was great at her job and loved her co-workers, but her boss, another woman, was making her life hell.
She didn’t want to complain to her husband about it and blamed herself to some degree. I tried to help her see just how much of a bitch her boss was and tried to convince her to look for other work.
I don’t know what ever happened to her. Once the pandemic hit, I had to abruptly stop working. Then, I moved to Europe and never saw any of my clients again.
The last and one of the most shocking confessions I have heard from one of my clients was from a young man in his twenties.
He was Indian-American, born and raised in America, with extended family in India. He seemed a little nervous, which is normal for most people who do not get massages regularly.
However, I was completely taken by surprise and rendered speechless as he began to break down in tears.
He shared with me that almost a year prior, he had been driving in India when an elderly woman stepped into the street from between two parked cars.
He was not going very fast, but he could not brake in time, and he hit her. No charges were pressed against him.
He told me that he rarely talks about the incident and that he felt like less of a person because of it. He didn’t know how he could ever forgive himself, even though his rational mind knew that there was nothing more he could’ve done.
The woman stepped out onto the street in a bad place at the wrong time.
I did my best to console him, but I could tell that it was something that would haunt him for many years to come. I never saw nor heard from him again.
The last confession that I will share is from one of my co-workers, not clients.
Despite the fact that the doors to the massage rooms located in spas are incapable of locking, one of my co-workers made out with one of her clients…on a few occasions.
It is not uncommon for people (managers, receptionists, estheticians, massage therapists, clients) to accidentally walk into the wrong room.
It’s embarrassing, but I’ve never walked into a room where I’ve seen anything inappropriate, nor has anyone walked into one of my rooms and uncovered such a thing.
I don’t know what I’d say…I’d probably just quietly close the door with my jaw still on the floor.
F. Leonora Solomon I hope this satiates some of your curiosity as to what it’s like to work in the massage field.
Here’s one of F. Leonora Solomon’s recent stories to help add more spice to your life:
and two more of mine:
