Brightening Election Ghosts of Past, Present and Future Into Oblivion
Well, whaddaya know? It’s the time of the year to be jolly and simultaneously all secretive about presents hiding away in hopefully artfully overlookable nooks and crannies. Seems like this jolliness which comes around every year is a bit subdued this time around, but the secretive is doing good though. I do have to admit that some days it seems more like Easter than Christmas, what with all the Easter eggs that keep appearing. Still, there are ghosts from the past, present and future which kind of keeps it all synchronized. I think we can all recognize the Ghost of Elections Past, right? It’s not like we never hear his mournful howling.
The Ghost of Elections Past is really kind of annoyingly scary and, God knows, persistent. I suppose when one spends time as a Ghost of Elections Past, you have to be a little daft under good circumstances, and under crap circumstances, one could be a bit unbalanced if the reason one has evolved to ghostliness is too gruesome to countenance.
“… if not winning the 2020 election wasn’t humiliating enough, the thought of losing to Joe Biden may have been so much of a public humiliation as to push Trump over into a delusional state of mind. If that is so, it is not enough to just claim the election was stolen, but he may now be seeking to expunge it from the record and history books. Trump’s latest rants are consistent with this.” -Chauncey Devega, The Salon¹
I kind of have to feel bad for the plight of the Ghost of Elections Past. He probably feels like one of those oversized mushrooms you find in gourmet stores that’s been stuffed with the best Mickey Dee has to offer. He was grown in the dark and fed with the BS of how wonderful he was so Daddy could have good feels, or something. Is it any wonder that he has trouble letting the past go? I sincerely doubt that he has any experiences at all in his entire life that would have prepared him for such a public humiliation as losing an election, that in his mind, he should have won. Only this time there was no way to hide his defeat. He couldn’t chalk it up to anything other
than his own incompetence. Well, not unless he grasped at those proverbial straws of “it didn’t really happen, cause I don’t want to see that it happened.”
Not good form, but if that’s all imagination allows, there is no law that says you cannot suck your thumb. But that does not mean that just because you’re having a fit, that I have to suck my thumb too. It isn’t just that the ghost lost, but he’s a smolderin’ like John Brown’s body. It ain’t getting better. He can make all the ghostly sounds he likes, but were I he, I’d be pretty skittish if I saw an old ambulance pulling up to guest reception at Mar Lardo. Just saying.
Well now, we have the Ghost of this Christmas right here. I reckon we’d call that Christmas Present, not to be confused with Christmas presents. In this Christmas right now, we have the Ghost of Kevin the Knight of the Kizzed Azz. RIP Kevin. Karma is such a bitch ain’t it? You wish for something for years and when you get it you just can not believe how crappy it is. But, if you made stupid deals to get the object of your desire, when you get to the object it can cost more than you can afford to lose. If we consider who has supported the Orange Jesus we’d have to say that Kevin here would be up near the top of all time supporters. Liz Cheney says he told her one thing and then did what he told her he was not going to do just before appearing at the ghostly production of the present of helping the Orange eat more than normal. That story raises questions about Kevin ever being in control of his other than conscious directives.
An argument can be made that one of the reasons Kevin was a short-lived Speaker is because he was fickle. No wonder the Ghost of Christmas Present appears so forlorn. It’s as though he lost his best Marjory and his best Gaetz bro. No one left to play Congress with, I suppose. But still, this Ghost has been forlornly rejected if not shunned by his ex-colleagues. It just isn’t fair, but it is just exactly what happens when karma kicks your butt. But, it was Kevin himself who thought that authoritarian rule was a good idea as long as he could claim membership with the authoritarians. When he was still with us he was just fickle, what can be said?
The Ghost of Christmas Future either looks hale and hearty, or all of that is a cruel illusion. The critical factor seems to be how Mikey Maga Johnson manages to influence the state to accept his religion or at least his religious views, blatantly ignoring the separation between the two. The problem the Ghost of Christmas Future has is if the Maga Johnson will allow legislation to limit who can participate in democracy. Mike and the Theocrats might welcome with open arms a strongman of the authoritarian bent who could even lean well into fascism, especially if they can assuage their reason by telling themselves that he has been chosen by God himself. Nothing appeases reason for the ignorant like blaming apathy on God. That way they can identify with a kind of reverse anti-establishment which is into the S and M of punishing any Freaker who threatens them with non-prescribed and non pre-approved thought. Or, God forbid, invites them to the Freaker’s Ball.
I’d think that it must be pretty demoralizing to find yourself a Ghost and then to be treated as a ghoul in the very halls of power you’ve dreamed of walking for years of your life. But the position of Speaker of the House of Representatives is cursed. At least it is for Republicans. Republican
Speakers of the House have not fared well over the last decade, or so. It has to be stressful to occupy a position in government where you have no odds of coming out alive, unless you just quit. But then to just quit is to climb the steps of the pyramid, then lay down and cut your own heart out. Right, Kevin?
I do think that it is more honorable to take Kevin’s approach than it is to take the path of Chuy the Orange Jesus. Chuy has been proclaiming himself to not have died for a while now. Someone should tell Chuy that his mom was German, not Virgin. While they’re at it, that someone should mention to all of the Minions who follow Chuy as though he were a god, that they’re going to have problems justifying their devotion to the Ghost of Elections Past, if the Ghost is in jail. So here’s a resounding Bah Humbug to all the Ghosts of Elections Past, of Elections Present and most of all to the Ghosts of Christmas future. I’ll have all my futures bright, thank you very much.
Pro tip: Hang out under the mistletoe and even Ghosts can get lucky.
Merry Christmas.
References
- DeVega, C. (2023, December 7). Expert: “Public humiliation” pushed Trump “into a delusional state of mind”. Salon.com. Retrieved December 18, 2023, from https://www.salon.com/2023/12/07/the-roots-of-megalomania-public-humiliation-pushed-him-into-a-delusional-state-of-mind/
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