‘Alien Diarrhea’ — Out of This Earth Experience For An Alien After Eating My Watermelon Sorbet Last Night

Safe space traveling starts with a good diet.

When I saw the Alien crawling in my backyard, begging me for watermelon ice cream, I realized how much conspiracy theorists on Twitter were lying.

What sense did it make to travel across the galaxy on a spaceship so technologically advanced that even Elon Musk had no idea how it worked, only to land on my lawn and ask for sorbet?

None.

That’s how I understood my grand-nephew, Ryan, was trying to steal from me again.

“Oh, you poor thing! Just a minute!!”

I gave him three large scoops of my special watermelon laxative sorbet.

“Hahaha! I tricked you again!” He said, trotting away with his loot.

He who laughs last laughs best, or, as aliens would say, he who abducts last abducts best.

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Grandma Smillew loves her afternoon cup of cocoa, Scrabble, and her grandson, Smillew Rahcuef. She’s also a pink belt in social media and marketing strategies. If you want to make her happy, follow her on Medium and write for one of her publications: All About Medium and Grandma Power.