Aging, Closure, And Forgiveness
“I told you many times, wherever you are, if you are experiencing problems, add to the solution. Running away is adding to the problems.”
“You are needed now,” sang from Moya’s cell phone as she relaxed at home on her third day of a two-week vacation.
A voice inside her unconsciously said, “I am on vacation.”
Five minutes later the ringing didn’t stop.
“Damn!” Moya grabbed her cell phone, answering, “Vera, I am on vacation, and I am not coming in!”
“I need your help,” Vera Stripe, the coordinator for the Home Care Agency she worked for said.
“I am on vacation,” Moya repeats.
“Lorna wants to leave. Her case loves her and wants her to stay,” Vera said. “Can you talk to her for me?”
Moya’s eyes skidded to Lorna sitting on the sofa in front of her.
“Ok,” she agreed, hanging up.
“That’s your ringtone for work?” Lorna quests.
“Why do you want to leave Ruth?” Moya asked ignoring her question. “I thought you like her.”
Lorna sighs, her head in her lap, seconds later she stood up, eased to the rear window to the left, looking out, she shares, “I can’t go back.”
“Why not?”
Turning to face Moya, she elaborates, “For the past three months my heart breaks listening to her crying and complaining about how cruel her kids were to her. I hated them for how they treated her,” Lorna explains.
“Our grandmother often said, ‘everyone’s lives are the way it is for a reason,’” Moya reminds her.
“I found out that she has six children and raised none of them. Family members and foster parents put these kids through hell, while she toured the world with many different men enjoying her life. All of them hate her and refuse to help or visit her,” Lorna explained in tears.
“It’s a job,” Moya said easing closer to her.
Lorna strolled to the opposite side and reminded, “Don’t you see, every day working with her I am reliving my childhood and the trauma I endured as a child.”
“It’s a well-paid job,” Moya reminds her “You can’t put your personal feeling and life into this.”
“You don’t understand,” Lorna stressed. “I endured what her children endured. I am one of them.”
“Your life is similar to her children’s because your mother did the same thing she did,” Moya sent her into reflection. “With the same results.”
“Now you understand why I can’t go back?” Lorna states.
“But you are doing the same thing to your kids what was done to you?” Moya points out. “History is being repeated on all sides.”
Lorna slumped to the floor before Moya could catch her. After assisting her to the sofa, Moya explains sitting beside her. “You don’t think this is weird that you were sent to Ruth’s?” Moya injects into Lorna’s brain.
Lorna turned, staring at her, as the truth spins around in her brain, sending signals to her senses.
“Life hands you this case for a reason,” Moya went on easing closer to her. “And sometimes, life places us at the right place, at the right time, for us to learn from what is going on around us. I told you, learn from the lives of the elderly,” Moya suggests.
In tears, Lorna said, “Oh God, that’s how I will end up if I don’t change. My children will hate me and refuse to visit me when I get old!”
“Like I told you,” Moya send her into reflection, “wisdom isn’t only in what they say, but it’s in what they do and how they live their lives. Learn from her life if you can’t learn from yours.”
Nodding as tears flow, Lorna confesses, “I abandoned my two children like my mother abandoned all her six. How come I wasn’t aware of that?”
“Life has sit’s own ways of getting us to see reality and the truth of our actions, choices and decisions in the lives of others hoping we learn and change,” Moya enlightened.
Silence roars briefly, then Lorna asks, wiping her eyes, “So you think I should go back?”
“Girl,” Moya suggests. “I told you many times, wherever you are, whatever problem you face, find a way to add to the solution. Running away is adding to the problems.”
“I am terrified,” Lorna explains.
“So, for that you give up?” Moya asked.
“Are you sure I should go back?” she repeats.
“Yes,” Moya advised. “There is a lot you need to learn about life and living. Her life has made you aware of your mistakes and want change. From lessons learned, maybe you can help to bring her some peace and closure.”
Moya’s words of encouragement seeped into Lorna's thoughts.
Three months later Lorna invited Moya to Ruth’s 90th birthday. All her five children, their spouses, and ten grandchildren were there. Also, Lorna’s two children were in attendance.
Moya tasted the happiness as it flowed from forgiving hearts.
In tears and happiness, Ruth thanked Lorna for encouraging her to forgive herself and reach out to her children and beg their forgiveness.
Her children thanked Lorna for being in their mother’s life.
Lorna thanked Moya, who suggested, “thank life, the elderly, wisdom, forgiveness and mistakes.”
As a caregiver, I learn from the lives of my cases. I take much of the wisdom that most ignores. There is power in knowing the outcome of our actions. It’s in each other’s lives. Forgiveness is needed in every life, but there seems to be more attached to aging. Live a good life and forgive when you can early. Don’t take too much negative energy and vibe with you as you age. It will add to your unhappiness.
Aging is wisdom, not pain — Annelise Lords
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