A Week of Mimicking Flowers
Notes from my daily photography experiments #1
How does one begin to recreate what already exists in nature?
I had tried to attempt that this week in preparation for a shoot. I had spent hours meticulously cutting shapes from crepe paper to create fully formed petals, stamens, and pistils, inserting thin steel wires in the proper places, bending and stretching the paper to match the elegance that is “flower”.
There is a joy to mimic what exists. I had been echoing a sentiment from John Steinbeck for years, where he said that only through imitation do we develop towards originality. We need to copy things sometimes and take the things we like for ourselves. We get to decide what we carry within us.
Perhaps if I try my best, I can copy the nature that I want to keep forever. Part of my desire for making flowers and trees from clay and paper is so I can have something that will never die.
Allow yourself to observe the world, and copy the world, without fear. Focus on the magic that exists around you, and magic will start to take shape within you.
When the water is still, it’s easier to see the things under the surface. So I tried to still my mind, and raise a white flag to the demons that have been living in my brain. Worried thoughts, pained thoughts for events that have yet to come to fruition.
It was a strange past few days of intense working. Focused on prop making and preparation for a workshop I have next month. I have granted myself little time to think this week.
I have been unable to properly appreciate how far I’ve come already, and I feel my brain slowly come to a halt.
Sit still, my brain told itself. You know what you need to do. Recreate the beauty you see, recreate the world as you see it. Beauty is always giving birth to itself.
Today I had a test shoot with a lovely young girl. I had spent hours prepping for it, only for that prep to be in vain. At any other time, I would be absolutely panicked and frustrated, unable to release myself from the shackles of the unnecessary pressure. But happily for me, not this time. The clarity of my own mind was granted to me
It appears that I have indeed overcome certain things. A few years ago, if I had come unprepared, or if I had props or sets that were unfinished, then dread would fill my belly, and the mosquito buzz of stress would fill my ears.
But today, I was ok. Part of me feels that perhaps my body simply has exasperated all those chemicals, that any more doses of it would do me in.
In the past, my hand would reach into the pools of my mind, and then it would resurface, often with empty palms. I should have known that I cannot expect brilliance when I fish in the shallow end. I must venture to the dark areas, the areas that bring me fear, but it’s also where I will find myself again.
Today on the shoot I prepared a variety of things, including the flower that I had tried to recreate. I surely would have had success if I hadn’t run out of paper. It is a shame that it didnt allow me that’s satisfaction, but perhaps I will be able to create it once again.
I came into today fully open to the spontaneity of creation, and to allow myself to be who I am, without the influence of the energies around me. In turn, I allowed myself to explore, and to make my photographic experiments.
Today, I gave in to the waves instead of letting them drown me, and I swam magnificently.
DAILY PHOTO EXPERIMENTS: Day 1: A Week of Mimicking Flowers Day 2: The Optimism of a Watermelon Day 3: The White Flowers That Danced Before The Night Sky Day 4: A Celebration of Procrastination Day 5: The Statue That Looked More Human Than I Felt Day 6: Today I Made A Tree
