27 Of The Best Bad Dad Jokes To Brighten Up Your Day
Jokes that are so bad, you can do nothing but laugh
Everyone loves a good bad dad joke, here are 27 of the best of them.
Disclaimer: warning, much groan-inducing jokery ahead. Proceed with caution.
What does a baby computer call his father? Da-ta.
Why do some people only ever get sick on the weekends? They have weekend immune systems.
A guy says to his friend, “How do you always have so much candy?” He replies, “I always have a few Twix up my sleeve.”
A guy says to his wife, “Am I the only one you’ve ever slept with?” “Yes,” she replies, “the others were 7’s and 8's.”
A guy says to his friend: “I can’t take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.” His friend replies: “That’s what you get for buying a pure bread dog.”
I didn’t want to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop, but when I got home, all the signs were there.
What’s the best way to make certain you get out of bed in the morning? Drink a gallon of water before bed.
My doctor told me I was going deaf. The news was hard for me to hear.
Why did the coach go to the bank? To get his quarterback.
If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans.
Why did the picture go to prison? Because it was framed.
Why are spiders so smart? They can find everything on the web.
I have a great joke about nepotism. But I’ll only tell it to my kids.
I was reading a great book about an immortal dog the other day. It was impossible to put down.
I’m reading a horror story in braille. Something bad is going to happen, I can just feel it.
To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my Word.
Why should you never brush your teeth with your left hand? Because a toothbrush works better.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.” But I opened the fridge door and it was working fine.
Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind. It’s tearable.
Have you heard about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
A guy says to his friend, “I don’t trust stairs.” “Why?” says his friend. “They are always up to something.”
An elderly man turns to his wife and says, “When I die, I want to be cremated.” “Why?” she says, “I thought we were going to be buried together?” “I know, but this is my last chance to have a smokin’ hot body.”
A century ago, two brothers decided it was possible to fly. And as you can see, they were Wright.
What job is guaranteed to lead to you making a ton of dough? A baker.
A guy says to his wife, “Women should not have children after 36.” “Why?” she says. “36 children are enough.”
I used to hate facial hair. But then it grew on me.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.
That’s all from me, thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this, you may also enjoy the following:
27 of the Best Jokes to Brighten up Your Day
12 Brilliant Wiseass Comebacks To Common Insults
30 Hilarious Scientific Jokes That Will Test Your Intelligence to the Limits
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