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mirror exercise anyway.</p><p id="162a">Avoid underestimating the effects of what this exercise can do. After a week or two, you will be less uncomfortable with facing yourself in the mirror. The mirror exercise helps you to generate self-acceptance.</p><p id="1bb3"><b>2. Write a Forgiveness Letter</b></p><p id="457f">You can choose to write a forgiveness letter to yourself. The letter to yourself should include the things that are making you feel guilty. Allow yourself to write freely. After you have written the letter, take a step back to review it for any lessons learnt and then shred or burn it.</p><p id="cdb7">Make the shredding of the letter to be symbolic of ending the cycle of self-blame. Set the intention that once you have burned it, you are letting blame go. From here on, say encouraging things to yourself.</p><p id="a077"><b>3. Practice Self-Compassion</b></p><p id="26a7">Stop blaming yourself for things that you can’t control. Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes. It is not realistic to expect yourself to be perfect or that you never make a mistake. You may not even have enough resources to deal with the situation back then.</p><p id="9dbb">Just like everyone else, you deserve compassion. Give yourself the permission to do better. Learn from the past and use your experiences to grow.</p><p id="2e91"><b>4. Tap to Release the Past</b></p><p id="2fd9">One way that you can let go of self-blame is via using EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or meridian tapping.</p><p id="14ed"><a href="https://readmedium.com/eft-tapping-to-heal-low-self-love-a1c752238118">EFT or meridian tapping</a> involves using the finger tips to tap on specific meridian points on the face and body. As you tap, you are processing your anger, frustration or whatever negative emotions or story that you have at the same time. EFT or meridian tapping is helpful in letting go of any emotional patterns that you have stored in the body and with releasing the past.</p><h2 id="c11e">Be Kind to Yourself</h2><p id="8316">Blame is toxic energy. To blame is to tear yourself apart by judging yourself harshly. As a result, you become your worst enemy. If you are in the habit of blaming yourself, it is time to stop.</p><p id="43b9">Letting go of blame is to practice kindness to yourself. And you are worthy of it! Try saying encouraging and compassionate things to yourself instead. Be more at peace wi

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th who you are, so that you give yourself every opportunity to align with your best self. Wishing you wellness!</p><p id="54bc"><i>If you’ve enjoyed this article, consider becoming a<a href="https://evelynlimcoach.medium.com/membership"> Medium member</a> for unlimited access. Thank you!</i></p><h1 id="e4d8">Recommended Reading</h1><div id="f3dc" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/emotional-neglect-how-to-heal-your-invisible-childhood-wounds-e4c60c5f1b1d"> <div> <div> <h2>Emotional Neglect: How to Heal Your Invisible Childhood Wounds</h2> <div><h3>How experiencing childhood emotional neglect can inflict wounds more than you realise</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*cgeCBjrmHjSRaTlE)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="c439" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/how-to-stop-feeling-lonely-and-left-out-from-i-dont-belong-eb1f0062056"> <div> <div> <h2>How to Stop Feeling Lonely and Left Out from “I Don’t Belong”</h2> <div><h3>Learn 5 Ways on How You Can Overcome Feeling Unwanted, Depressed and Alienated and Gain a Sense of True Belonging</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*Banw67ivNGrSDgR-)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="d613" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/how-to-let-go-of-the-past-and-unstuck-yourself-79ba37e46737"> <div> <div> <h2>How to Let Go of the Past and Unstuck Yourself</h2> <div><h3>How to let go of the past and free yourself from the pain of keeping it alive. Learn 10 ways to unstuck yourself.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/0*JOm0HsT8gM4CkaJT)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

4 Ways to Let Go of Self-Blame

What if you know that you need to let go of self-blame but have found it hard to so? Learn how you can finally stop the pattern of sabotage and move on.

How often and how badly do you go into self-blame?

People go into self-blame whenever they have have made a mistake, done something silly or brought about dire consequences that created a negative impact on others. If they can’t stop blaming themselves, it could be because they have become emotionally attached to the memory of the past. They are not able to let go.

Perhaps you already know that you need to let go of blame but you are unable to easily do so. A part of you wants to hold on to blame because it is your way of not letting yourself off the hook. If what you have done has created some bad consequences, you want to hold yourself responsible. Self-blame keeps you accountable.

However, it would help to remind ourselves that blame is also anger directed inwards. We erode our spirit when we don’t let go of anger and forgive ourself. Our energy levels come down and as mentioned, it can lead to harmful behaviours. We end up sabotaging ourselves.

Letting go of self-blame does not mean that we absolve ourself from responsibility. In fact, what is more important is learning the lessons so that we don’t repeat them. It serves our highest interest to be able to move on. Letting go of anger and blame is to align with our best self. And we start to by practising more kindness inwards.

How to Let Go of Self-Blame

Here are 4 ways to end the sabotage of self-blame…

Do The Mirror Exercise

A helpful exercise is to look yourself in the eye in the mirror every day for 30 days and say, “I forgive you completely.” Obviously, this can feel a little silly at first. You may find it weird talking to yourself. But I suggest setting any inner talk or comments aside and do the mirror exercise anyway.

Avoid underestimating the effects of what this exercise can do. After a week or two, you will be less uncomfortable with facing yourself in the mirror. The mirror exercise helps you to generate self-acceptance.

2. Write a Forgiveness Letter

You can choose to write a forgiveness letter to yourself. The letter to yourself should include the things that are making you feel guilty. Allow yourself to write freely. After you have written the letter, take a step back to review it for any lessons learnt and then shred or burn it.

Make the shredding of the letter to be symbolic of ending the cycle of self-blame. Set the intention that once you have burned it, you are letting blame go. From here on, say encouraging things to yourself.

3. Practice Self-Compassion

Stop blaming yourself for things that you can’t control. Remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes. It is not realistic to expect yourself to be perfect or that you never make a mistake. You may not even have enough resources to deal with the situation back then.

Just like everyone else, you deserve compassion. Give yourself the permission to do better. Learn from the past and use your experiences to grow.

4. Tap to Release the Past

One way that you can let go of self-blame is via using EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or meridian tapping.

EFT or meridian tapping involves using the finger tips to tap on specific meridian points on the face and body. As you tap, you are processing your anger, frustration or whatever negative emotions or story that you have at the same time. EFT or meridian tapping is helpful in letting go of any emotional patterns that you have stored in the body and with releasing the past.

Be Kind to Yourself

Blame is toxic energy. To blame is to tear yourself apart by judging yourself harshly. As a result, you become your worst enemy. If you are in the habit of blaming yourself, it is time to stop.

Letting go of blame is to practice kindness to yourself. And you are worthy of it! Try saying encouraging and compassionate things to yourself instead. Be more at peace with who you are, so that you give yourself every opportunity to align with your best self. Wishing you wellness!

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