Writing Tips #1 Show, Don’t Tell Your Story

The art of showing through your words

The art of storytelling fascinates me, and I always try to enrich my knowledge through reading so that I can be a good storyteller one day.

I would love to write a series of writing tips to share my takeaways from several books, learning blogs,YouTube channels, etc. with you if you find them interesting.

Today’s writing tip: Show, Don’t Tell

Knit your story such that the readers can visualize and feel what is happening with the characters. Don’t tell what the character is going through, but show the readers through crafting your words and let them feel the emotions.

‘Show, don’t Tell’ is one of my favorite writing tips and is the core of any storytelling.

Let’s master the art of showing and turn our flat writing into a colorful story.

What’s the difference between showing and telling, and Why is this so important?

Telling is like simply spoon-feeding the information to the readers, rather than giving them a role in the reading experience and deducing things for themselves- Jerry B. Jenkins.

The goal of showing is to transport the reader’s mind into the story, allowing them to experience the characters’ actions and emotions. In other words, the author attempts to show you what is happening through images and action, rather than simply telling you what is happening in narration- masterclass.com.

Few examples

Telling: Niall is tall

Showing: Niall’s girlfriend cranes her neck to look up at him or that he has to bend his knees to fit into a group picture.

Telling: Walter is angry

Showing: His face is flushing, his voice is rising or slamming the table with fist.

Telling: Mulan in cold

Showing: Mulan raised her collar, tightened her scarf, shoved her hands deep into her pockets, or turned her face from the biting wind.

Telling: Rhea is tired

Showing: Rhea is yawning, groaning, or stretching, and her eyes are puffy, her shoulders slumped.

Through telling you left readers with nothing to do but take in facts. So, how to involve them in the reading experience? The answer is simple, let them deduce the facts and reach their own conclusions. Readers don’t want to be told the character is angry, sad, or happy, but they want to feel it!

Writers are supposed to take readers into a world of imagination and create such an atmosphere that our readers dive into exploring the hidden layers of the story.

Showing makes our story lively while telling is needed to summarize without over stressing the point.

(Source: YouTube channel of Jerry B. Jenkins).

Few examples from books

Example #1: He’s nervous about his job interview

In his book Behold the Dreamers, Imbolo Mbue shows Jende is nervous:

He could do nothing but think about the questions he might be asked, the answers he would need to give, the way he would have to walk and talk and sit, the times he would need to speak or listen and nod, the things he would have to say or not say, the response he would need to give if asked about his legal status in the country.

His throat went dry. His palms moistened. Unable to reach for his handkerchief in the packed downtown subway, he wiped both palms on his pants.

Example #2: She was angry

From Raymond Chandler’s The Big Sleep:

She slammed her glass down so hard that it slopped over on an ivory cushion. She swung her legs to the floor and stood up with her eyes sparking a fire and her nostrils wide. Her mouth was open and her bright teeth glared at me. Her knuckles were white.

Example #3: She feels trapped in her hometown

In The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett, one of the protagonists explains why she feels trapped by her hometown’s smallness:

She’d trampled the same dirt roads her entire life; she’d carved her initials on the bottom of school desks that her mother had once used, and that her children would someday, feeling her jagged scratching with their fingers.

(Source: These book examples have been extracted from a blog post of Henneke)

Example from my Fellow writers

Example 1 :

See the few lines below from a terrific story titled A Girl Called Trust: An Allegory About Love And Abuse by wonderful storyteller Liberty Forrest, Author

Once upon a time, far, far away, in the Forest of Innocence, there lived a little girl named Trust. She was small and delicate, and she lived with her Guardian, Love, in the Castle of Self-Esteem.

Trust was a special girl, and when she was born, the Keeper of the Castle Gate created protectors for her. These soldiers were called Boundaries, and they were led by the strongest of them all, the Boundary of Self-Respect. Whenever Trust left the safety of the Castle, they followed her while she played in the Forest. (See the full story here)

Example 2 :

A wonderful full of life Story titled A Cup of Peace by Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles

As I lazily watch the little sparrow hop across our yard, pecking at the scattered grain as if in a hurry to get its share before the pigeons descended, I marvel at the miracle that is my life.

Filled with serenity, I see my two-year old daughter run towards me, laughing. I set my cup down and open my arms to her, careful to keep the hot liquid out of her way. As she settles down comfortably in my lap, I lay back and allow my mind to wander into the recent past. (The full story here)

Example 3:

A beautiful story Positive Vibes, Health, And Spirituality Make A Good Life by wonderful writer Dr. Preeti Singh

A cool breeze is blowing and through the trees, the leaves rustle. I feel a sense of quietness. There are happy sounds around me of birds twittering and the insects making sounds in their language. I play with the butterflies and the squirrels. (The full story here)

Tips on how to showing

1. Construct the details:

Lamott, in his book titled ‘Bird by Bird ‘encourage writers to view their world in small sections, as small as a one-inch picture frame.

Construct the details of your book scene by scene, moment by moment, by looking through these small windows. When you look through small windows, you see a lot more minutiae — the curved crack etched in the sidewalk, the one green pea that rolled under the table, the rim of grease under the fingernail of the doctor. (source: The blog of Bookbaby)

2. Use of Dialogues:

Well crafted dialogues can easily bring the readers in the world of the story. Dialogue allows the story to emerge naturally rather than spelling out every detail. Keep the dialogues brief and impactful. Give each character a unique way of speaking

Ask these questions to yourself

· Would someone actually say this in real life?

· Does it move the plot forward or develop a character?

(Source: self-publishingschool.com)

3. Use sensory languages:

Bring your reader into the world you are creating through use sensory details like sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste. Sensory language spices up your writing and allows readers to experience your words as if they’re living your story.

Examples:

1. Sight: The streets glistened like shiny ornaments after the heavy rain.

2. Sound: The wind swirled around our beach house, whistling loudly to a terrible tune.

3. Smell: The baking cake filled the kitchen with the aroma of vanilla

4. Taste: He savored the fluid yolk of the Eggs Benedict.

5. Touch: Nira feels the chill of a smooth stone she’s pulled from a lake.

Recap:

There should be the blending of showing and telling while we craft our story, we should follow what the story demand, we must know where we need to detail and where to summarize the facts.

Showing: Detailing so that the reader can experience the story.

Telling: Summarizing the facts, simply telling the readers what is happening.

Let’s make our stories lively by striking a balance between showing and telling.