#72 — Dead or alive | WRITING PROCESS | ABOUT ME

Writing Habits of a Grumpy Bear

Writing sucks, but some of you Medium folks are OK

Marie A. Rebelle was kind enough to tag me in her story about her writing process, and Celia McKinley mentioned Care Bears in hers, so here we are.

(Also, I understand by submitting this, I’m doing my part to keep Smillew Rahcuef’s latest Medium zaniness going, so you’re welcome! :))

1. When did you start writing? Is there a specific story?

I started writing in Grade 6. Our weeks-long novel project was one of the greatest things to ever happen in school. We learned lots of useful stuff about drafting and editing, and some useless stuff about plot, symbolism, foreshadowing, and all that nonsense. My “novel” — about 1,000 words — was a fantasy story about adventurers having to find four elemental crystals.

I wrote an award-winning short story in high school, and a poem included in our school’s anthology. I didn’t really write fiction again until a few years ago, when I started writing erotica for my partner.

If I could find it again — the story is saved on a floppy disk and I need to get it retrieved — I’d adapt that story from high school into a modern erotica story.

2. Do you have rituals in writing? If yes, then please share them with us.

I don’t have a specific ritual. I’ve written during lunch breaks at work, at home in the evenings, while on my exercise bike, and in bed.

I must have music, though, and my Coke Zero. And my clacky keyboard. I have tried many ways to make writing a routine, to give it structure, and I haven’t been very successful. A set word count or a set period of writing time just don’t work for me. As much as I like routine and regularity, I just can’t work that way. Some days I write nothing. Others I write for hours straight.

3. The ugliest monster that writers are afraid of is writer’s block. If you have a recipe to deal with it, kindly share it.

I’d love to share it, but I don’t think there’s a recipe that works for everyone. I have no shortage of ideas on my To Write list, thankfully. I think Celia’s right — you literally just have to do it.

That doesn’t mean I don’t pester people endlessly with questions about my WIP instead of actually working through my plot problems — just ask Celia or Jordan Riley or Posy Churchgate - Writes & Edits Fiction or Paragonas Vaunt — or stare blankly at the screen. I get paralyzed by process, instead of trusting that I can write well enough off the cuff to at least have a first draft.

This spring, Posy Churchgate - Writes & Edits Fiction and I wrote a three-part story together, and it was an amazing experience for lots of reasons. One of them was the realization that it really is OK to just to plunge in and get the words down, and worry about the useless stuff like plot and symbolism later (also Posy is a genius at plot so I didn’t have to worry too much).

I also get paralyzed by fear that what I write is absolute garbage. There’s no recipe for that either. You publish or you don’t. It takes guts every time, just like it takes guts to start writing in the first place.

4. Describe the process of finding ideas for your stories. Please elaborate.

Sometimes I ask my partner for ideas of what they would like to read. Some ideas come from clients that commission me though Custom Erotica. Some ideas come from a specific phrase or prompt, or are inspired by a certain kind of personality.

While they’re almost all erotic, none of my published stories so far really describe a personal fantasy of mine. That’s not something I’m ready to wrestle with yet. Sometimes I feel that that means my work isn’t honest. But then again, it’s also fiction, so as long as they are true to themselves, the stories are OK.

5. As humans, we suffer without knowing it by choosing not to move outside our comfort zone. Do you have a “comfort zone” in writing (i.e. a topic that you always like to write about)? Have you tried to step outside your comfort zone and write something drastically different?

My comfort zone is married or committed couples. I haven’t written hotwife or cuckolding stories, for instance, and probably never will. Some of my stories involve sex between strangers, but I’m most comfortable within established relationships.

I stepped way outside my comfort zone when I wrote A Good Boy for Redemption last year. That story is very disturbing, and it’s tame compared to a lot of the (great!) fiction in that magazine.

That was a very rare departure for me, and I’m not really comfortable right now writing anything outside erotica.

6. Besides Medium, do you use other writing platforms? Please share your experiences.

A few of my earliest stories are on Smashwords and Amazon. Once — not if! — I finish my novella or novel, I will put it in both places.

I have very little experience with either platform, but it seems to work for my writing friends, so I look forward to learning more when I’m ready to make greater use of those platforms.

Someday, I will have a website as well.

7. Have you published a book? If yes, how and where…etc. Plz, feel free to share your links with us.

A book? Ha ha, no. Just some stories. It’s coming…

8. You write because writing provides you with something special. Could you share your experience?

It does?

Writing is work. Hard work. I’ve been doing it professionally for nearly 25 years, and it’s always been work.

Sometimes the end result is garbage, sometimes it’s meh, and sometimes it’s something I’m really proud of.

Why do I write erotica then, if it’s tedious work? Because I can, I guess, and because sometimes I have something to say. Plus, I’ve met some amazing people in the erotica and Medium communities, and that makes it worthwhile on its own.

9. Do you write a paragraph, a chapter, or a story with the end in mind or not? Plz, explain.

Sometimes I have the ending in mind; more often I don’t. I rarely map out a story, I’m a pantser through and through. Which is why my novel has been such a struggle. I know the beginning and the end; it’s the middle of the Oreo cookie that’s giving me trouble.

Most often, I know who a character is and what they will do based on their personality, and the story goes from there. When I try to plot, things go sideways, like a car smashing through a guardrail, just to land on a burning train, which then derails into the ocean. And then is hit by a meteor.

10. Every writer has an idol. Who is yours? And what do you find inspiring in her or his trajectory?

I don’t have a writing idol. I have the opposite. Writers like James Patterson, Danielle Steel, Dan Brown, and others remind me that even complete shit can be published and read by millions. So I feel better about myself when I think about them.

Really creative, talented people like Marie A. Rebelle, Posy Churchgate - Writes & Edits Fiction, Celia McKinley, Jordan Riley, May More 💜 Tales, Paragonas Vaunt are an inspiration to me. And often a source of fascination: how do they write so well, and how are they so prolific?

11. Does being on a writing platform like Medium help your writing plans? Plz, elaborate.

For sure. I co-edit an erotica publication, so I’m always immersed in other writers’ work, which I learn from.

I’ve met some fantastic people here, and they inspire me to write more and to write better. That wouldn’t have happened if I had stayed a recluse and just pushed stuff out onto Smashwords or Amazon.

Plus, both our publication and some others have some really good prompts, so that helps get the creativity going.

But seriously, half of Medium articles are “how to write for Medium” or “here’s an in-depth look at my Medium stats.” I have no time at all for that, or any AI-produced boilerplate content thrown against the wall like a toddler’s dinner (AI trash is about as appealing as dripping peas on wallpaper) to see if it can get clicks and cash.

Knock it off. Be original.

All right, so I think that checks the boxes:

• Submit a story to keep this publication alive
• Answer the questions
• Provide no comfort whatsoever to people with writer’s block or imposter syndrome or who even just type words
• Brag about a 27-year-old story
• Suck up to the great Medium people
• Snark on James Patterson
• Plug my writing commission gig
• Take a shot at the Medium nerds chasing their tails and the AI losers
• Be grumpy

Lots of the people I would have tagged are tagged already, so there won’t be any of that. Go read some great erotica instead!

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