MUSIC MASHUPS, TRACK 15
Writin’ in a Shysta’s* Paradise
A parody of Livin’ in a Gangsta’s Paradise by Coolio
*NOTE: “Shysta” is way we pronounce shyster (a person, especially a lawyer, who uses unscrupulous, fraudulent, or deceptive methods in business) in New York’s Jewish hood.
Writin’ in a Shysta’s Paradise
(Sung to the tune of Livin’ in a Gangsta’s Paradise)
As I scroll through the desert of the Medium feed I try to skim though the fluff, and can’t find nothin’ but greed ‘Coz I’ve been yawnin’ and snorin’ so long, that Even my chil’ren thinks that my mind is gone But I ain’t never dissed a post that didn’t deserve it Me be readin’ like a punk you know that’s unheard of You better watch out you lyin’, cuz I be spyin’ Or you and yo’ bullshit might be in my sights I really hate to rip but I gotta, Bro All I see are writin’ hacks and the claims of mo’, fool I ain’t the kinda G the little homies wanna be like Tappin’ keys in the night, shoutin’ rants at the streetlight
Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise
Look at the algorithm, they got me pacin’ I can’t live a normal life, I was raised in the stat So I gotta be down with the laugh team Too much motivation readin’ got me chasin’ dreams I’m an educated fool with money on my mind Got my phone in my hand and a gleam in my eye I’m a locked out writer, set keyboard banger And my stats goin’ down so don’t arouse my anger, fool Life ain’t nothin’ but a paycheck you say I’m makin’ art, do or die, day after day I’m sixty-three now, but will I live to see sixty-four The way things are going I don’t know
Tell me why are we, so blind to see That the one’s we pay, ain’t you and me
Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise
Thirstin’ for the money, thirstin’ for the power Writin’ like a church bell, hour after hour Everybody’s clappin’, but nobody ain’t lookin’ It’s going wrong in the system, so many people bookin’ They say that you can earn, all the shysters like to talk sh*t If they don’t show their tax forms, how can they prove it? I guess they can’t, I guess they won’t It’s just a joke, that’s why I know this site is f*ckin’ broke, fool
Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Been wastin’ most their time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise Keep wastin’ most our time, writin’ in a shysta’s paradise
Tell me why are we, so blind to see That the one’s we pay, ain’t you and me Tell me why are we, so blind to see That the one’s we pay, ain’t you and me
This was Part I of “The Lord of the Rants” trilogy. Here are parts two and three:
