She copied every man’s idea!
Woman Invents Bra That “Doubles” as Two Emergency Facemasks
I see a Start-Up opportunity here
Save your old, sexy bras and donate to me, please!
No, this is not a joke(Okay, yes, it is, unless I find an Angel Investor). But it is intended to be humorous and, yes, I am going to be making fun of it a little. . .until a man needs to ask a woman to take off her bra because he needs a mask. Then it won’t be funny. It will probably hurt, and I see arrests happening.
And, to be honest, a man did this first. I mean, every man who has been around a naked woman, or helped her undress (for whatever reason) has at some time tried on her bra, put it over his ears and called himself Princess Leia, or put it over his face and talked like Darth Vader. Well, except me. I am way too mature for that.
The first one
Back in 2010, a doctor by the name of Elena Bodnar, a Russian doctor who worked in Chicago and was inspired by the Chernobyl disaster, “invented” a bra that “separates and can be used as two masks which filter out particles that were found to be as harmful as radiation in Chernobyl.” Jane McEntegart, Author of Emergency Bra Doubles as Two Respiratory Masks.
As a result of her invention she was awarded the “prestigious” Ig Noble Prize, which is awarded each year to people who invent something that makes you laugh, then think. Possibly more laughter than usual in this idea, but, yes: “Why not?” you think.
Here is a You Tube video of her demonstrating it at the Ig Noble Awards in the UK.
That poor guy! I wonder if he wore the long shirt on purpose?
Recently, Dr. Bodnar released her “Coronavirus bra”.
Now, Laura Peek a fellow Medium writer, already wrote a story about whether bra manufacturers can use their expertise to start making masks. Here is her article, and a very interesting one at that:
It’s a great story on the history of 3M’s development of masks. It also mentions Dr. Bodnar and her invention.
Problems?
However, I see some difficulties in Dr. Bodnar’s concept.
- What type of virus emergency would necessitate a woman to remove her bra in public, divide it in two, put hers on first, then put the other half on the other person? It’s not like they’re in an airplane and it decompresses and you have to put half your bra on your kid’s head.
- If it is your kid you are putting it on, better make sure it’s not a pre-pubescent boy. You’ll hear a lot of ‘Eews!” and have quite the struggle!
- Probably better make sure it’s not a male stranger, too. He’ll probably spend time trying to caress the bra before he puts it on, and you’ll probably never get it back. Could you imagine having only one of your “girls” supported as you walk down the street?
- Also a concern: how much time does it take a woman to get her bra off? It appears to take Dr. Brodnar a little longer than I like to get her bra off. I’d probably die from holding my breath in a viral emergency while she takes her sweet time taking the bra off and turning it into the masks. If you are trying to share with a male partner, or even a male stranger, you should probably let them do it. We’re really good at getting a bra off a woman quickly, usually with one hand.
- You also have to make sure the woman is wearing the right type of bra. Some styles probably won’t work too well, though they might be fun to wear on your face:
I’d definitely wear the one below! This Spiderman bra would be cool to wear on your face:
6. However, the “biggest” concern is the size of the bra and size of the other persons face. If you are a 44D(I guess I have to change that to 40E. . .see below) and the other person’s face is a 36A, you’ll probably suffocate the poor bastard, or they’ll be blind as a bat and walk out into traffic.
My good friend Leyla Jones, who is funny as hell and has really big boobs, demonstrates what would happen if a 44D is placed on a normal size face.
Now when she beta read this for accuracy, she told me her actual size is 40E, and that 44D is a smaller boob, but a bigger rib circumference. Of course, being the “guy” I am, I thought 44D, being the bigger number, was the bigger boob. But, nooooo. Apparently, the number is around the ribs and the letter is the size of the boob. Who woulda thunk it? See what you can learn writing on Medium!
In the video below, she is listening to something on TikToc, but couldn’t tell me exactly what. It is NOT her voice. It is, however, her bra and face.
Seriously, though, Dr. Bodnar suggests using bras you don’t use any more. Not a bad idea at all. Do women keep old bras?
However, as juvenile as this sounds, please don’t use your sexy bras. We men have enough trouble not acting like pre-pubescent boys who are seeing their first naked lady every time a woman in a bathing suit walks by.
Imagine our distress seeing a sexy, lacy bra covering a lovely lady’s face. I don’t think most men could handle that (me excluded, of course).
Oh, and please don’t tell the Kardashians about this. I can just see it now: a new reality show about those spoiled billionaire brats opening up a new business making sexy face masks and making millions.
Wait a minute! I could do that! Now, if only I can find a Medium article on how to Start-Up a business. . .and a partner. . .with money. . .and get millions of women to donate their sexy bras to me.
Purely for a business reason, mind you.
