Why You Should Tell Her When You’re About to Come

It’s not just practical, it’s hot!

Guys never told me they were going to come.

I know it’s supposed to be an extremely common thing, and that made me jealous because that hasn’t been my experience. For whatever reason, the majority of the guys I fucked never grunted, shouted, or said anything at all before finishing.

They came out of the blue. And just like that, we were done.

I’d masturbate later to make up for the fact that the party was over before I was done dancing. But it wasn’t just because I didn’t get to finish that it bothered me — I would’ve had to take care of that myself even if they told me they were about to hit their climax. It’s because it ended so damn abruptly.

I didn’t get to experience their orgasm as a buildup. I didn’t get to see the finish line coming before they crossed it. I didn’t get to anticipate the conclusion to our hookups.

The ending just snuck up on me and that was that.

It was kind of frustrating. They’re just three simple words: “I’m gonna come.” It should’ve been so simple.

Eventually, I married a guy who gave me that experience. I could enjoy hearing those words grunted at me before feeling the warm splatter of his come landing on my ass.

But because I’ve also had my fair share of silent ejaculators, I know what’s missing when guys come unannounced.

If you’re a guy and you’re not sure if you should be telling your girl when you’re about to finish, let me clear this up right here, right now. Yes, you should. Those words should always be coming out of your mouth before anything comes out of your cock.

Here’s why.

It Gives Your Lady a Choice

I want to get this one out of the way first because in a lot of ways it’s the most obvious issue. It’s also the most important one.

When you’re coming with someone, there’s also a chance that you’re coming in someone. Or maybe on them.

Letting her know you’re about to come gives her the opportunity to approve of what’s about to happen.

If she’s giving you a blowjob, she might not want to get a mouth full of come — or at the very least, she might want to know it’s on its way.

If she’s giving you a handjob, she might want to finish a way that doesn’t end with her fingers all gooped up.

And if you’re enjoying some good ol’ penetrative sex, then she might very much want to have a say in whether you’re going to come inside of her or pull out and finish elsewhere.

When you let her know you’re about to finish, she gets to have a say in how that all goes down. And that’s pretty damn essential.

It Lets Her Be Her Sexiest Self

We also want to know that you’re about to come so that we can make sure you finish in a really fun way.

Every girl wants to feel sexy. If we had our way, we’d make every time we fuck a memorable event.

And what’s more memorable than a really hot finish?

You coming is her moment to shine. She’d rather not waste it by being grossed out by a surprise mouthful of come or having an awkward reaction to a surprise splatter somewhere else.

She might want to pull your cock out of her mouth so she can stroke it while you cover her tits.

She might want you to pull out so she can arch her back and beg you to come on her ass.

If she wants to swallow, she’d probably prefer a heads up so she can be prepared. That way, she can do it eagerly, with her doe eyes meeting yours so she can show you what a naughty girl she is.

And she might want to encourage you by talking dirty or going even harder so you can have a more satisfying climax.

Letting her know you’re about to come lets her pull out all the stops, and you’re both going to have a better time because of it.

It’s Really Fucking Hot

A lot of that stuff doesn’t apply to me and my husband because I married a delayed ejaculator.

Thanks to a combination of phimosis and death grip, he doesn’t actually come from handjobs, blowjobs, penetrative sex, or anal. I never have to worry about an unwelcome surprise.

I don’t need any warnings from him, but I still love hearing him say those three little words.

I find it really fucking hot when a man vocalizes his pleasure. And hearing “I’m gonna come” is almost as sweet as the groans and moans that accompany him actually spilling his spunk.

I also love taking in a man’s orgasm. I’ve watched my husband jerk off just so I could see what he looks like when he’s giving himself pleasure. It’s still fun when it’s abrupt at the end — I love watching him tense up and grunt while the come oozes over his fingers.

But it’s even sweeter when there’s an arc to his pleasure.

When he announces he’s about to come, I can see the build up. It tells me not just that it’s all about to end, but that it’s getting to the good part.

When he declares he’s about to come, I focus on him because I don’t want to miss a moment of his climax. I might watch intently or close my eyes and just listen to the sounds. Either way, I know it’s time to start paying attention.

It Lets Her Sync Up with You

I love coming at the same time as my partner.

There’s something so fun and intimate about finishing together, but there’s almost no chance of it happening unless there’s a warning.

Even when I’m just enjoying some mutual masturbation with my husband, I’ll often hold back from giving myself a big, show-stopping orgasm. I’ll build up to it, bring myself to the edge, but keep the stimulation on the lighter side so I don’t tip over and actually come.

I save myself until I hear him say he’s getting close. That’s when I turn up the speed on my vibrator and ride it like I was trying to smother it.

It doesn’t always work. Sometimes, I come too quickly. Sometimes, I can’t finish in time. But when we get it just right and we’re both hitting our peaks at the same time, it practically feels like we’re fucking each other even though we’re on opposite sides of the bed.

It’s also one of the reasons I love jilling off to Feel Good Filth’s audio porn. It often ends with him counting down to the orgasm. That helps me focus on the goal and it feels so fucking satisfying when I can come at the exact moment he’s done counting.

And it’s not just about giving a heads up. Hearing that announcement can actually get me there. A big, clear sign of pleasure like that is such a huge turn-on that it can help tip me over and actually make me climax. It’s even been responsible for some of the double and triple orgasms I’ve had.

So, if you’re fucking your gal, let her know when you’re almost at the finish line. It might be what helps her cross hers.

It Gives Us a Chance to Make It Last

Letting her know when you’re getting close also helps her make sure she gets hers before it’s over.

If she hasn’t come yet or isn’t ready for all the good fucking to end, she’ll appreciate being given the chance to prolong it.

She might decide to switch positions so you can get a different kind of stimulation.

She might ask you to eat her out so your cock can get a break until it’s ready for another round.

Or she might simply tell you to slow down or ease up so you don’t come before she’s ready.

That’s a win-win. You’ll still come in the end, but so will she. And you’ll also get to enjoy more fucking, prolonged stimulation, and a very satisfied woman.

Always Let Her Know

If you get tongue-tied when you’re fucking, that’s okay. You don’t always have to say the words “I’m going to come.” It’s usually fine to grunt, groan, and vocalize so enthusiastically that there’s no mistake about what’s about to happen.

Making it clear that you’re about to pop off and that you’re having a damn good time because of it is what really counts.

But when the stakes are higher — like when you’re in her mouth — make sure to get the actual words out. That’s not a time to take risks.

Always default to expressing your pleasure. I’ve never heard of a woman who doesn’t enjoy knowing a guy is enjoying himself. I don’t know of anyone who isn’t pleased by the signs that she’s helping her partner get off.

It’s respectful. It’s practical. It’s also really fucking hot. So, the next time you’re about to come, be sure to let her know.

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