LGTBQ |Ally
Why Learning What You Already Know About Love Hurts So Much
And How to Do it Anyway
“I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.” Pablo Picasso
I would love to tell you how learning to become a genuine ally for the LGTBQ person in your world will come naturally and easily, especially if you have a deep abiding faith in God. The problem is, for many faithful believers, it’s hard. It feels like asking a believer to throw away everything they have ever believed to be the truth. Ugh.
That’s why I always ask people just to be willing to learn. Just open up your mind to input some new information. That’s it. That is the beginning.
I would love just to lay out a simple, step-by-step plan to absorb and assimilate the knowledge you have a loved one who is LGBTQ so everyone could get on with their lives, but it can be a lot harder than you think.
So, today, instead of that, let’s try this. ONE STEP CLOSER.
That’s it. One. And today, our one step is to learn. Learn one thing.
For some, a devastating scenario occurs when our loved one comes out because there is a religious or cultural stigma in play. A belief that being gay or lesbian, bi or transgender is wrong, dirty, sinful, despicable, or any other ugly adjective out there. And because we live in that worldview, we are in a place of hell.
And I am not out here trying to drag you off into a liberal worldview that shuns that belief. That is NOT my job. Nor my intent. I want to guide you through a transition in your life that doesn’t tear you apart because your family is divided.
When it comes to addressing this conflict from a spiritual place, my best advice is to invite you to do what I did. Pray. But do it a bit differently than what you might feel like doing at first. I explain more about that here:
But we can take one more small step toward creating an atmosphere in your family that can survive the upheaval that can happen from this kind of revelation. That includes learning something that will help us understand.
Wasn’t it St. Francis who asked us to seek to understand rather than to be understood? Or was it Dr. Phil? Either way, it’s solid advice. Oh, how we are screaming inside to speak our piece, to let everyone within hearing distance know our pain, plight, and anguish.
This time, wait. This level of disconnect in a family can be a massive divide. Don’t let it fester and grow. It doesn’t have to be that way. Start small. Start with reading this story. If it fits for you, I invite you to follow the series.
I would love to acknowledge some people I know and follow here on Medium! Shout out to Jeff Herring, Phil Truman, Ada LLoyd, Roger Himes Esq. , Linda Halladay, Jennifer McDougall, Dr. Art Eckstat, Dr Mehmet Yildiz Tim Maudlin, EricAsbeck.com and Alun Richards. I thank you all for your words.
Learn more about who I am and why I came to Medium.
And about my passion for helping these endangered refugees:
Sadly, since I wrote this last fall, another LGBTQ refugee from Kakuma has been killed. I will share more on his story soon.