Why I Don’t Trust Anyone Over 30

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Abstract

When they turned 30, they started lying about the good stuff.</p><ul><li><i>“No, sorry, the park is exceptionally closed this Tuesday. You’ll have to stay inside.”</i></li><li><i>“No, sorry, there’s a new law that says we cannot buy ice cream for preschoolers after 4:47 pm on Thursdays.”</i></li><li><i>“No, sorry, your grandma loves multiplication tables. That’s why I asked you to write them all down from memory on her birthday card.”</i></li><li><i>“Yes, your grandma is special. she celebrates her birthday every week.”</i></li></ul><p id="8cb4">Only one year before, I had unlimited access to the park, never heard of multiplication tables, and my diet consisted of ice-creams and fruit sorbets. My parents linked the DRAMATIC change to their new jobs, but I knew the truth. The great ticking clock had moved a notch from 29.99 years to 30.00.</p><h1 id="9442">Later experiences in life confirmed this sad fact.</h1><p id="bdc5">One simply can NOT trust anyone over 30. The worst example of all was my first hiring manager. He was so <a href="https://redemptionmagazine.com/i-am-a-perverse-and-manipulative-hiring-manager-dc5d0fc5ab77">perverse and manipulative</a> that I cried during the interview. It was such a traumatic event because my friends had warmly recommended him. At one point, I thought they had set this trap intentionally. But I checked with them and — surprise, surprise — the manager had turned 30 a week before my interview, changing him for the worse.</p><p id="2c44">You might think this is all about me. After all, I’m the common denominator.</p><h1 id="510d">But look at the US Senate.</h1><p id="0b7c">One needs to be at least <a href="https://www.senate.gov/senators/qualifications_termsofservice.htm">30 years</a> of age

Options

to become a senator.</p><p id="492d">And we all know they can’t really be trusted.</p><p id="98ee"><i>One last thing I’d like to add</i></p><p id="cc69">I don’t trust anyone over 30, and it’s not an ageist thing because I don’t trust anyone under 30 either (except for <a href="https://readmedium.com/i-have-seven-kids-and-thats-a-lot-e27c506dbbbc">my second daughter</a>, she’s an angel — <i>so far</i>).</p><p id="9bd3"><i>I don’t usually answer writing prompts, but when I do, it’s always a writing prompt by the fabulosa <a href="undefined">Ann James</a></i></p><div id="48d4" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/deluded-custodians-sept-challenge-b13de806f477"> <div> <div> <h2>‘deluded custodians’ sept. challenge</h2> <div><h3>anyone can participate. no need to be a custodian or deluded.</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*HP7rnBZOBj3YuUVaZwFALw.jpeg)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div><div id="4671" class="link-block"> <a href="https://readmedium.com/want-to-be-published-17126153ecb0"> <div> <div> <h2>Want to Be Published?</h2> <div><h3>The Pub is the write place to go</h3></div> <div><p>medium.com</p></div> </div> <div> <div style="background-image: url(https://miro.readmedium.com/v2/resize:fit:320/1*nkd8epsyUzpHBhlgGxmjLg.png)"></div> </div> </div> </a> </div></article></body>

I learned these lessons the hard way.

During preschool, I had a fantastic teacher (Miss Anna). Our days consisted of nap time, playtime, and story time. It was lovely, and I was in love with the school, three of my classmates, and Miss Anna — of course. In my blessed innocence, I thought it would last forever, but first grade was coming up.

I was ecstatic when I learned Miss Anna would still be my teacher after preschool.

I was still in love.

Then Miss Anna turned 30, I started first grade, and it wasn’t funny anymore.

Not.

At.

All.

No more story-time or nap-time. Barely one hour of playtime per day. We had UOI, homework, and tests.

THE HORROR.

My parents told me it was usual for the first grade, but I knew the real reason. Miss Anna was over 30, and I couldn’t trust her anymore.

It confirmed a theory I had devised while observing my parents. When they turned 30, they started lying about the good stuff.

“No, sorry, the park is exceptionally closed this Tuesday. You’ll have to stay inside.”

“No, sorry, there’s a new law that says we cannot buy ice cream for preschoolers after 4:47 pm on Thursdays.”

“No, sorry, your grandma loves multiplication tables. That’s why I asked you to write them all down from memory on her birthday card.”

“Yes, your grandma is special. she celebrates her birthday every week.”

Only one year before, I had unlimited access to the park, never heard of multiplication tables, and my diet consisted of ice-creams and fruit sorbets. My parents linked the DRAMATIC change to their new jobs, but I knew the truth. The great ticking clock had moved a notch from 29.99 years to 30.00.

Later experiences in life confirmed this sad fact.

One simply can NOT trust anyone over 30. The worst example of all was my first hiring manager. He was so perverse and manipulative that I cried during the interview. It was such a traumatic event because my friends had warmly recommended him. At one point, I thought they had set this trap intentionally. But I checked with them and — surprise, surprise — the manager had turned 30 a week before my interview, changing him for the worse.

You might think this is all about me. After all, I’m the common denominator.

Why I Don’t Trust Anyone Over 30

My grandma excepted

I learned these lessons the hard way.

Later experiences in life confirmed this sad fact.

But look at the US Senate.

‘deluded custodians’ sept. challenge

anyone can participate. no need to be a custodian or deluded.

Want to Be Published?

The Pub is the write place to go