Why Affirmations Don’t Work Most of the Time and What You Can Do About it

You can’t make it by faking it. Authenticity Counts, Big Time!

I have been a self-development junkie for over three decades, and for the time and efforts I have put into it, I don’t have a lot to show for it. That doesn’t mean I don’t see genuine progress in my self-development. I do.

Are you confused yet?

Self-development, by its very nature, is personal. Whether other people see the change or not is irrelevant. You could make a lot of progress within that may not be visible to others. In other words, you can see a lot of progress, but not be able to show it.

What does that have to with effective affirmations?

Nothing and Everything.

Why don’t affirmations work?

Simply put, an affirmation is a statement that affirms the truth about an idea or a belief.

I used to affirm, “I am building a large cash reservoir,” until I realized that it doesn’t align with my internal beliefs. No wonder that affirmation was not useful for me.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that I have a problem with having money. My definition of being wealthy has nothing to do with accumulating cash. To me, being rich means having the means available when needed to live the life I desire.

When I realized the truth about my core beliefs, a new affirmation showed up in my life when a friend of mine shared her affirmation about money.

“Ever-increasing sums of money circulates in my life.”

It was almost perfect. I could get behind that idea. It aligned with my beliefs of having the means necessary. It also takes the fear of losing what I have on hand because I understood that the purpose of money is to be spent. It’s a tool, and tools are meant to be used, not collected.

Have you been using affirmations that don’t work? You might want to put them through the authentication test. Do you feel excitement or resistance when repeating an affirmation? If there is resistance, it might be that the affirmation doesn’t align with your core values.

Understanding the purpose of affirmations

Affirmations are tools for personal development and change. You must use the right tools for any given project. Just as a saw and a hammer are both tools needed for construction, they are for particular jobs during the building process.

Similarly, there are affirmations to create change, and there are affirmations to facilitate growth.

Affirmations for change will almost always cause resistance because of the nature of change itself. We have a natural propensity to resist change. As long as you are feeling resistance, the affirmation will be useless.

So how do you use affirmations to create change?

First, you need to look at the desired change. Is the change you want in alignment with your true self? If it is not, you will either not be able to create the result, or you’ll be miserable afterward if you succeed. Do you feel challenged, or do you feel stressed?

Generally, challenges are exciting, while stress is always — stressful. Discerning between the two is the key to make the affirmations for change useful. Take time to get in touch with your feelings; they are the mode of communication for your inner-self. Let them guide you to needed change.

The reason positive affirmations don’t work is that they target the conscious level of your mind, but not the unconscious. If what you are trying to affirm is incongruent with a deeply held negative belief, then all that results is an inner struggle. ~ Sophie Henshaw, DPsych (source. Thanks, Holly)

Using affirmations for growth

Growth affirmations are more comfortable to use because they help you become your authentic self. Again, discernment is in order. Don’t get trapped by societal norms. When you’re on track, you will feel joy and excitement. When you’re off track, you will feel stress.

Here are some of my growth affirmations.

I am the permission slip for the weirdos of the world to let their weirdness shine.

I am a beloved child of a rich and abundant Universe.

I easily convert prospects into clients.

I help my clients tune into their inner selves.

I am quickly and effectively developing habits of success.

I am inspired by my faith in God to take the right action at the right times.

Creating Affirmations that work

I am not here to teach you how to formulate an affirmation. There are plenty of excellent resources that show you that. What I would like to share is how I learned to personalize my affirmations to work for me.

How to own your affirmations

Earlier I mentioned that an affirmation entered my life when a friend shared her affirmation about money, and I said it was almost perfect — for me. She found it to be perfect for her and used it with excellent results. I was finding it challenging, so I meditated upon it and came up with my own version that excites me, and works for me.

“Ever-increasing sums of money is circulating in my life, with joy and ease.”

Adding that last phrase to her wonderful affirmation helped me overcome my resistance due to personal challenges in the past.

When money started to flow into my life in more significant amounts than before, I sent her $100 with a note of appreciation for introducing me to the affirmation. Upon receiving the notification from PayPal, she texted me, saying, “The lesson in my 30-day course in gratitude for the day says, ‘I am grateful for the unexpected gifts that show up in my life.’ How cool is that? Thank you.”

If you need help formulating or personalizing affirmations, email me at mr(dot)rasheed(dot)hooda(at)gmail(c0m), and leave a comment so I can check for it.

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Rasheed Hooda is a published author and a regular contributor to ILLUMINATION, a writers’ community on Medium where writers support each other.

He is a self-proclaimed weirdo who lives a Freedom Lifestyle and writes about related topics — Travel (a top writer), Personal Growth, Freedom, and entrepreneurship. (Get the Newsletter)

“You can let others tell you what it means to be successful, or you can decide it for yourself.”