Why 99% of Men Won’t Find Love
Here’s the solution
It almost killed me, but it happened. My heart existed outside the perimeter of my body and was held by the rough hands of another woman. These hands would later break my heart in a heartless fashion.
I was baited by her exterior and blinded to her interior. She was all body, no soul, and I was just another casualty of her toxic personality. Because of my encounter with this woman, I began to incorrectly view all women as duplicates: soulless entities that pose as lovers and operate as enemies.
This isn’t only my story, but the story of millions of men. However, reality is subjective, and through our subjective eyes, we never question the fictionality of the stories that we tell ourselves. We often believe that our experiences create our stories, but I beg to differ. I believe our stories, the stories we tell ourselves, dictate our experience. So, let’s change our stories and analyze our experiences.
The foggy mirror and pointed finger
You’ve seen it before, a man gets heartbroken and turns into a vicious victim. He then proceeds to believe that real love is nonexistent, the existence of a decent woman is improbable, and attempting to find love is illogical.
This is only a belief. And despite the certainty of belief one has, belief is often formed by emotion, not logic.
I’ve done this in every relationship, constantly pointing the finger at my ex while holding a foggy mirror to my own actions. I was effective at holding others accountable while showing little signs of personal accountability.
It wasn’t until I took a personal meditation retreat after my previous breakup, that allowed me to see my ineffectiveness in finding love. Here are a few things that I’ve learned
Aim for the heart, not the private part
After a disappointing night out, we spent the next hour burning the midnight oil in the bedroom.
Sex was the only time we got along, but everything else felt wrong.
Look at me, sounding like a poet. However, we weren’t in alignment and our relationship was anything but poetic. In fact, it was quite pathetic. We had no commonalities and toxic personalities, two ingredients that often lead to verbal explosions.
Following our late night bedroom boom, I began to question myself; a question that would only be answered after months of reflection.
“How did I get into this relationship?”
Preceding the relationship, I slightly dabbled in the dating world, warming the hearts of the feminine without making anything official.
Unexpectedly, the day came when I was officially tired of being single. Months later, I set my sights on someone from afar. Although our bodies would soon unite, mentally we remained distant and our souls rejected our alliance.
But how?
Like most men, while searching for prospects of potential partners, I put a microscope on the physical attributes of women and kept a blind eye on the person underneath the skin. I’ve done this over and over and have repeatedly blamed my exes for our failed relationships. However, I now believe that it was my amateur filtration process that subjected me to the pains of those relationships. It wasn’t the women. It was me.
They were simply supplying what I subconsciously demanded: sex
The solution: A couple of years ago I abandoned my sexual pursuit and became a celibate male.
Because I look at the feminine without lustful eyes, I am better able to spot prospects with desirable qualities.
Where is love?
Throughout our lives, we often search for love like it’s playing a game of hide and seek with us. Don’t be fooled, this is a one-player game. We have been concealing our love in a chamber that exists deep within us.
Why are we hiding?
Perhaps you’ve been hurt in the past and may unconsciously operate in a defensive fashion. I get it. If there’s a possibility of being hurt, one must defend himself. Maybe your heart was broken by a heartless person. Once you find love from within, you’ll be able to attract love outside of you. However, if you want love, you must take the offensive.
The art of war says
“Rely not on the likelihood of the enemy’s not coming, but on our own readiness to receive him.”
I’m not implying that potential lovers are enemies but when the opportunity arises you must be ready to offer love in return.
Love is a good business
There are many people demanding love. So, if you want to be a profitable lover, you must supply love where love is demanded. There are husbands who pay their wives little attention, girlfriends who don’t express love to their partners, and fathers that withhold their love from daughters.
This is a sign of opportunity.
The first and last person you saw when you went grocery shopping could both use some extra love. So, instead of wishing to be a consumer, be a supplier. Your love is demanded and it will be delivered back to you in a dramatic fashion.
Yes, ninety-nine percent of men won’t find love. However, this isn’t a problem. Follow these tactics and become part of the one percent.
