What Your Spiritual Awakening is Really About

The cosmic war within

When I went on my first ayahuasca retreat in April 2022, I had an experience where I perceived my higher self as a fierce lioness. This is something I also mentioned in this article about Spiritual Warfare and the Rise of the Divine Feminine.

That ayahuasca retreat was life-changing for me. During that retreat, I experienced energies running through my body and sounds coming through my throat that can only be described as: not of this world.

I started to wonder if I was being contacted by “aliens” or if, perhaps, I myself am an “alien.”

One of the shamans used the word “galactic” to describe his observation of my experience.

One morning, following a ceremony the previous evening, we did a breath work exercise. At the end of the breath work exercise, I saw an image in my mind of a white, cosmic-looking lion head, and I saw a word: Lyra.

I didn’t know what this meant or if it was even relevant. I Googled the word “Lyra” and discovered it is a constellation in the sky. I discovered that there is such a thing as a Lyran Starseed, which is a star being with feline features; they look like a cross between a lion and a human. I discovered that Lyran Starseeds had been displaced from their home planet after it was destroyed by dark beings referred to as “Reptilians.”

I learned that Lyrans who survived the destruction of their home planet took refuge in other star systems such as the Pleiades and Sirius. I wondered if perhaps my soul is a Lyran Starseed. I wondered if the Lyrans’ dark, traumatic history related to Reptilian beings had anything to do with my frog phobia, which I have had since I was a very young child. Since childhood, the mere sight of a frog would fill me with sheer terror in a way that never made logical sense.

I did not receive any external validation of this vision and insight related to Lyra. My healer at the time seemed convinced that my soul was either from the Pleiades or Sirius, or perhaps that I had spent time in both star systems — which would make sense, if I was a displaced Lyran Starseed. I started to understand that star beings do move around to different star systems, and rarely incarnate on the same planet over and over again.

By the end of that retreat, I decided to go on a second retreat within a few weeks’ time, in search of more clarity, more healing, and more breakthroughs.

The second retreat was in Colombia. There were three planned ceremonies, two of which took place in a hut or maloca inside the Amazon jungle. From my perspective, nothing overtly remarkable happened during those ceremonies, apart from what was now “usual” for me — lots of purging, channeling light language, making “alien” sounds and movements, and constant, involuntary movement of my left hand, which is my writing hand.

When we left the jungle, I had all but given up hope of receiving any major breakthroughs or visions related to my healing. I was still very mystified by what exactly was going on.

We returned to our base, which was a rural bed-and-breakfast on a farmland set against a picturesque backdrop of mountains. When we arrived, we were told that there would be one final ayahuasca ceremony. The ceremony would be held inside the library of this rural farm resort. Instead of being seated on a yoga-mat-covered floor, propped up against the wall of a hut, we were able to sit on leather-covered chairs and sofas in a cozy library, surrounded by shelves filled with books.

As I was preparing for the ceremony, I heard my guides say, “Go into your heart.” So I did my best to follow the guidance. I ingested my first dose of the medicine, and sat in my seat for about an hour. Nothing seemed to be happening. I went back to the shaman, who was seated at the front of the room. I told him, “I don’t feel anything.” I asked him to hit me with a larger, stronger dose. So he did. He used a pipe to blow a tobacco-based medicine called ambrosia up my nose, and then he hit me with a mega dose of ayahuasca.

I went back to my chair and sat down.

Instantly, my mouth opened and I started channeling what I thought was light language. But this time, my voice was guttural and low, and I was rolling my “r”s in ways that weren’t usual. I could sense an arrogance in my voice and demeanour. It was as though my chair had become a throne, and I was a corrupt tyrant spewing out harsh invective. But it wasn’t really my voice — something was speaking through me.

Soon, I lost awareness of what was happening, and I found that I was floating in some in-between, foggy space. I had left my body. I started wondering how I was going to get back home without a body.

I am not sure how long I spent floating around in the ethers.

Gradually, I started coming to. I was surrounded by healers who were trying to help me. I realized that whatever was happening, was a very good thing. Something was being removed that definitely had to go. This felt like a rescue mission.

One of the healers told me to say, “I am the light of God.” In my semi-conscious state, I did my best to open my mouth and formulate the words.

When I regained my consciousness, I was no longer seated on the chair; I was lying on the tile floor with my face pressed against the tile. There had been some sort of takedown. A battle had been fought and won, and now I was lying on the ground in its aftermath.

There was one shaman still sitting with me; the same man who had given me the word “galactic” at my first retreat. He asked someone to bring a pillow for my head. He asked me if I had any idea of what had just happened. I replied, “No.”

I noticed, however, that my solar plexus felt clean and clear for the first time in perhaps ever. There was a sort of coolness in that area of my body that I have come to associate with the removal of karmic blocks.

He said, “Something very dark just left you. I think you lived with it for a very long time.”

He shared with me the vision he had seen of what had left me. It was a Reptilian being. It was yellowish-green in colour, with scaly skin, but also greyish fur on some areas of its body. It was a relentless being that had fought very hard to stay attached to me.

The shaman remarked that it takes a warrior to live with a being like that attached to your consciousness. This remark was an acknowledgement of the silent war that I had been fighting within myself, for decades of my life.

Another healer who speaks only Spanish, had also seen this entity. I heard the word “Draconian,” as he described, in Spanish, what he had seen.

This was undoubtedly a lot for me to process. However, it made logical sense to me that if I am a “galactic” being, that I would have a “galactic” entity attachment. Whatever I had come to work through here on Earth, went beyond this earthly realm. I started to understand that I was somehow healing from things that had happened on other planets and in other dimensions of reality.

As time went by, I continued to work with various shamanic healers, and they were each able to provide different insights that helped me put together the puzzle pieces of what was going on.

I came to understand that that Reptilian entity was an attachment that had been in my ancestral DNA for generations. It was part of my soul contract to live with that entity and to fight an inner war to release it from my consciousness. I learned that my maternal uncle, a man who had lived most of his life battling addiction, had come to Earth, about three decades before I did, to fight this battle, too. He had died in July 2021, 11 months before I had this experience in June 2022.

More than a year later, in the fall of 2023, I had a healing session in which my new healer channeled a message from a galactic race of beings that she described as “blue beings.” She said that I belonged to this race of beings. She said that these beings and I all share a consciousness and that they all experience, through me, everything that I have gone through here on Earth.

Basically, she was saying I’ve had an audience throughout my entire life that I haven’t been aware of. They said, “When you are sad, we are sad, too.”

A day or two after I had that session, the following card fell out of my brand new oracle deck, Divine Masters by Kyle Gray: the name of the card was “Blue Beings.” I brought it to my healer at our following session and asked her if this was what she had seen when she was channeling my guide. She excitedly exclaimed, “Yes!”

Through my healer, my Blue Being guide said they all laugh at me because I keep “forgetting” my own power, the fact that I have spiritual gifts and that I do have the ability to see through my third eye. She explained that I came to Earth with an ambitious goal of trying to awaken my spiritual gifts through human will. She said that before leaving my home planet, I asked my fellow Blue Beings not to help me, and to let me do it alone.

I think that perhaps this happened many lifetimes ago, and that I have been stuck here on Earth for many lifetimes due to traumatic experiences that were designed to keep the soul stuck. I think that in each lifetime, I’ve lost — or failed to reclaim — another fragment of my soul. I think that this has kept me bound to this Earth, and having to reincarnate over and over again, each time in the hopes of awakening so my soul can fully ascend and leave the entrapment of this planet.

I think this is the trap into which all humanity has fallen.

I believe ascended masters like Jesus and the Buddha have incarnated on Earth in attempts to help free us from this prison by modelling the state of being we must adopt to release ourselves from the shackles of what Earth has become. Such masters are referred to in the Buddhist tradition as bodhisattvas; compassionate beings who do not have any need to reincarnate on Earth, but who do so out of love and empathy for human suffering.

As I’ve continued to heal and to process various elements of my journey, including and especially my twin flame experience, I have come to realize how my life experiences were designed to finally awaken me to the energetic entrapment that has effectively turned Earth into a prison for the soul.

Until now, I hadn’t been able to reconcile that vision and insight I received in 2022 related to the Lyra constellation and Lyran Starseeds, right before I had a so-called “Draconian” Reptilian entity attachment removed from my consciousness.

The day before I started writing this in March of 2024, I stumbled on this video about the Lyran Orion wars. It tells about the battle between the feline-like beings name Lyrans, and a race of beings called Draco-Reptilians.

There were a few things that struck me about this story.

Firstly, it mirrors the Creation stories that the Christian tradition have told us about the Garden of Eden and the role of Lucifer in orchestrating the downfall of humanity. In this cosmic version of the story, Lucifer is the being who created the Draco-Reptilians who ultimately destroyed the Lyrans’ home planet, an Eden-like environment.

Secondly, it refers to the soul of Jesus Christ as having come from a Lyran origin. I was reminded of The Chronicles of Narnia, a known Christian allegory, in which Aslan the lion is the Christ figure of the story.

Third, I was struck by the way in which the story between the Lyrans and the Draco-Reptilians mirror some of the deepest traumas that have taken place here on Earth. Most specifically, it mirrors what colonization has done to Native, Indigenous populations around the world through colonialism, weaponry and violence, as well as slavery.

Not only have these events on Earth resulted in deep wounding and trauma, but it has affected the passing down of ancient wisdom, including shamanic healing, that is needed in order to restore us back to our wholeness and oneness.

The cosmic version of the story explains that corrupt Draco-Reptilians discovered they could energetically feed on emotions like pain and terror by committing atrocities against Lyran beings. They refer to this energy source as “loosh.” In the human, earthbound version of the story, emotional pain and trauma in humans is used as a “source” of energy for personality types we have come to describe as “narcissists.”

I realized that this same war that started up in the cosmos between Lyrans and Draco-Reptilians has been playing out here on Earth.

I realized that this same war that started up in the cosmos had played out within my own consciousness. My inner Lyran went to battle with my inner Draco-Reptilian, and ultimately, my inner light being won the war.

I realized that we are all here on Earth fighting that very same cosmic battle within our own beings.

Everything that happens outside of us, also happens within us.

If you have been going through a spiritual awakening, you may have become increasingly aware and open to the existence of galactic beings. You may have come to see galactic beings as a source of help and guidance; and they are. You may have also heard, however, that no one is coming to “save” us from the entrapment of planet Earth.

We came here to save ourselves.

We — humanity — are the answer to the resolution of the age-old battle between the light and the dark.

Every incarnated human contains within their soul a mix of cosmic origins. We contain within our own beings both the light and the dark. We contain the wisdom of our cosmic ancestors. We contain knowledge and experiences from galaxies across the cosmos.

At a human level, we contain a mix of DNA that goes back countless generations — some benevolent and beneficial, and other not so benevolent nor beneficial. Through our humanity, through the choices we make each day, we possess the ability to draw upon our access to that wisdom to awaken and embody more light within the human cellular structure.

That is how we resolve the galactic war that started in the cosmos many eons ago. We resolve it within the sacred temples of our very own inner beings. That is the only place in which the war can truly be fought and won.

We have within us the ability to fight and win the battle of the ages between the light and the dark, the Lyrans and the Draco-Reptilians, Jesus Christ and Lucifer, God and the Devil. It is all contained within us, within our humanity.

As within, so without.

The reality we have manifested here on Earth is a reflection of the inner battles that rage within. The cosmic war between the Lyrans and the Draco-Reptilians has played out over and over and over again right here on planet Earth — among humans, and more specifically, within each individual human consciousness.

It will continue to play out, until we have each won the war within our own selves; within our own minds, hearts and souls. There will not be any peace until that inner war is won.

The day before I found that video about the Lyrans and Draco-Reptilians, I was guided to watch, for the first time ever, the 2014 movie Interstellar. Clips of the 10-year-old movie started showing up on my YouTube feed and I realized that spirit wanted me to watch it. So I did. I wondered what message spirit wanted to convey. That night, it came to me in perfect clarity.

My spirit wanted me to watch the movie primarily for a specific scene in which Matthew McConaughey’s character Cooper finds himself inside a 4D matrix or tesseract that was constructed within a 5D reality where time does not exist. Within that 4D matrix, he possesses the ability to use the energetic frequency of his love for his daughter to locate specific moments in time in Earth’s 3D reality. Through this vehicle, he can communicate with a past version of himself as well as his daughter.

Initially, Cooper uses the 4D matrix to visually locate and communicate with a past version of his daughter from before he ever left home. He tearfully tries to beg her not to let him leave home on this wild and dangerous expedition into outer space. In that moment, he desperately wishes that his past self had made a different choice.

Then his AI robot companion points out, “They didn’t bring us here to change the past.”

Then Cooper has a moment of profound realization. He says, “They didn’t bring us here at all. We brought ourselves.”

He realizes that a future, advanced version of human civilization had found a way to send information into the past, to help them change the future. To help humanity to save itself.

While he is in this matrix that will be created by “advanced” humans in the future, he finds a way to send the information into the past that will inform its creation in the future.

Time and space do not operate the way we perceive them to. And there is no “them” out there who are coming to save us from the reality we have collectively created. “They” are us, and we are them. Everything “out there” exists within each one of us.

A spiritual awakening is, effectively, the realization of that fact.

Your spiritual ascension is your decision to master your human emotions to the extent that your inner light burns through any darkness and density that has been keeping you in a hellish, earthbound existence for lifetimes on end. It is the conscious decision to not let any external force use pain, terror and fear to drain your life force and use your energy as a source of fuel to keep a false, inorganic matrix alive on planet Earth.

It is to reclaim and embody all aspects of your soul and to hold all aspects of yourself in the light of your compassionate, non-judging awareness. It is to recognize that you hold within you both the divine and the devil; and it is to consciously choose, each moment of each day, which one you will embody.

If we want to save the world, we will do it by saving ourselves.

When you have fought and won the war within, the war without will cease to exist. We will never be able to change the past, but we can indeed change the future. Our future selves have come to help make sure of it.

Thank you for reading!

If you want to read more thoughts on the role of our future selves in our current spiritual awakening, you may be interested in this article: