EDUCATION

What You Have to Know to Understand French People

Education drives societies

The Louvre Pyramid is the best example of the importance of education: now world-famous and admired by all, this structure was the subject of much criticism during its construction. But why?

Putting people in boxes from a very early age gives a fixed view of the world, and as such, the Louvre had to remain as it was.

Education is what shapes a society, generation after generation.

There’s still time to bring about change to build generations that are more open to the world.

I read an excellent article by Jolie Porter entitled “Things I Miss About the U.S. As an American Living in Paris”. I found it true and very subtle in the way she shared these cultural differences.

I felt it was important to explain the origins of these differences, which I believe lie in school education.

Over the past few years, there has been a real awakening among some people looking into positive parenting and understanding the extent to which we, the French, are locked into a way of thinking that stems from our school education. Unfortunately, these people are confronted every day by those who have not managed to change their view of what a child is, and who misinterpret positive parenting as laxity.

The shortcomings of a strict and often humiliating upbringing have far-reaching consequences for adult behavior. It’s not surprising to read what Jolie has to say:

“I’ve learned through comments made by my neighbors how ridiculous I look picking up Uber Eats in sweatpants. That’s how important fashion is in Paris.”

Unfortunately, it is not a question of fashion, but of a lack of open-mindedness and freedom. People are put into boxes from an early age. Breaking out of these boxes requires an enormous effort, which few manage to make. So it’s easier to judge those who break out of the boxes, rather than to find a form of freedom to draw inspiration from.

In French schooling, we don’t learn to encourage others, and when we are congratulated for our work, we get mockery and even jealousy from our classmates in return. The result is that, as adults, we perceive compliments as something embarrassing, even suspicious.

Here again, it is not surprising to read the answer of Jolie Porter’s French husband after receiving a compliment:

“I don’t like how she put me in the spotlight.”

Fortunately, more and more teachers are aware of childhood necessities in kindness and care about teaching them how to use Nonviolent Communication in their daily relationships. It is an uneasy job in France currently because they are still under the pressure of an overly strict society, which looks for good grades rather than behavioral skills.

When they try to propose activities that go beyond the traditional school scheme, they find themselves having to defend themselves in front of parents who don’t understand the importance of the skills of living together.

I share these thoughts as a Frenchwoman who suffered from a lack of self-confidence due to the school system and moved to Greece to give her children the opportunity to grow up in a more caring environment.