Kaleidoscope
What should the Birthday Bumper look like?
Birthday Suit
As a kid, the importance of Bum was negligible even when I had to get into the character Baloo’s costume of Jungle Book. Did a bum wagging dance to it?
Look for the bare necessities
The simple bare necessities
Forget about your worries and your strife
I mean the necessities
Old Mother Nature’s recipes
That brings the basic needs of Life.
Was it because in the entire class of 32 students, I was the tallest or the fattest or the Bum who just bowed over the song beats. I know the truth lies in all three. However, it is too late to grieve. As I matured, I wondered if it’s the face or the base; men get attracted more. I also knew that beauty resides in the viewer’s eyes.
When I visited the Museum of Lourve in Paris, Monalisa painting had people like honeybees stuck in the hive. I could not detect a small land in her room to squeeze. But I blinked at her from the door’s threshold. By saying that the people gathered are all trying to imagine
How was your birthday tramp? Is the Lord righteously by your countenance?
Or did Leonardo get a chance to check it out?
Or more than your face, you used to keep flexing over to look at your bare butt?
I was glad to find out finally a plastic surgeon had out beaten all the philosophers, learned & scientist of the World. Dr Matthew Schulman, he was establishing the Guinness World Record. Who claims to know your ass type way better than you. Throughout his career, he’s examined about 50,000 cigarette butts; oh, I’m sorry to slip off the tongue. I meant 50,000 birthday tramps outside of porn sites. Have a dashboard of 35 countries and virtually all of the U.S. He grew up personally more than 2,000 of those wholly.
Good News & Bad News are dissections on butt shape, fall into five categories. If you peg down your butt shape, you can end up flaunting the fitting panty to it.
Square Birthday Bum: If the line between the hip bone and the outer thigh is perpendicular to the floor, congratulations, your buttocks are square and Flat, too, as a platter.
If you bend to look at your backyard, it should envision you to exhibit.
The Square pizza box where, regardless of holding a round pizza, the package is still square. So your ass is stuck on two square Pizza Boxes with a Pizza Cutter line between them as a division.
Brownie the mellow cakes baked in rectangular stoves, but served in squares. Two square brownies on your bounty doing the full Monty to cut with a chef’s knife chop-chop-chop.
Floppy Disk An obsolete method of storing digital data. But if you got a square ass, they’ll never be out of date — two black square diskettes with you as a programmer digging between your wisecracks off your head & ass.
V-Shaped Birthday Bum: If the line between your pelvis and hip angles dips inward, your butt takes on a “V” shape from behind, commonly diagnosed in women with broad shoulders and very narrow hips. Kudos, you have a V shape in the front and back; ladies, you’re left with no differentiation. But let’s see the bright side; you don’t have to bend & waste time like other ladies to check your birthday ass. Seeing the V in front should suffice for that urge.
Your rearview review will deceive you in 3D View off.
Two Plus Two Roads are running diagonally from an intersection of your each bum curve, marking a no man’s land between your slit.
Goats Udder W is stricken with a butcher knife that leaves two milky V’s on your tush with a milky river into your crack. Anyway, you beat Cleopatra; she used to bury her hands and feet in a milk bath where you bathed your ass.
Two Mountains with a loose motion out of the shaft make you feel deep in the valley with a stomach ache to enhance its existence.
A Shape Birthday Bum: “Pear-shaped” women tend to have A-shaped butts that widen at a lower place the hip bones. Now, if you jumbled with your body shape, grab a pear stand facing it in the mirror compare your profile to it if the shoulder, waist & hip tally bingo you are in this race.
Your Solar Baked Buns provides a delusion off.
Two Triangles balance on your butt with a scale dissecting them in your slit.
Two Sandwiches balance on your ass by the ant that is getting teased steps on your crack crack crack.
Two Signboards are reading No Entry with a hallway passing between your drainage.
Round Birthday Bum: This one is pretty explicit, but mainly because you saw this shape of Kim Kardashian, Queen Bey and J Lo. If you want a rounder fanny — this tends to be a widespread feeling. You end up giving a karate kick to all of the above get a bigger, rounder & brighter one. Don’t forget to sign your Bum insured this a new trend on flame.
Your 360-degree View Rumps allow you to observe through.
Two Big Watermelons are popping up on your backside with an offshoot cutting your division.
Two Lifebuoys on your Bum, a chunky strap slices your crack.
Two Big Cheese Wheel on your haunches a mouse running in slit slot deciding where to bite first.
Upside Down Heart Birthday Bum: The old, upside-down, heart-shaped butt is round without defying gravity. Like your Round shoes with a curve towards the outer hips, with more volume. The magnets are bonded to the arch of your Bum, disobeying the gravity pulling on bum flesh opposite to it making it look erroneous. These tramps lure undesirable cellulite into the territory.
The Deformed Cheeks on your back will look comparable
Instead of running a heart on your sleeve, it slides upside down on your buttocks with a Cupid arrow striking between the valley of your depth.
Two tree leaves placed on your shelf, with manure oozing into your wreck line to mark their territories.
A large kiwi cut in half, the interior bordered to a gifted divine heart. Place it on your swag in the proper position, giving a bogey eye illusion with a hocus-pocus pole falling between your slot.
After these extensive searches, if you have not yet found your shape. No need to bother humans are everywhere with their background for the display. I know theoretical things are challenging to comprehend. However, it is practical that where the game begins and ends. So keep stalking peoples, butts. The more you do, the more you will be able to identify. For the starters, scroll up to the lady who is showing her butt to YOU!