What is a Clairsentient Empath?
My Experiences With Clairsentience
First off, not all Empaths are Clairsentient, but all Clairsentients are Empaths.
Karla McLaren, the Proto-Empath, and author of The Art of Empathy, as well as numerous other books, defines an Empath as:
“Someone who is aware that he or she reads emotions, nuances, subtexts,undercurrents, intentions, thoughts, social space, interactions, relational behaviours, body language, and gestural language to a greater degree than is deemed normal.” Karla McLaren, The Art of Empathy (Boulder, CO: Sounds True, 2013), p.5.
As for the ‘reads thoughts’ part, in my experience, it’s the gist of thoughts tied to emotions. I don’t just meet someone and know everything they are thinking. And why would I want to? I’ve been married for over 30 years, and my husband and I seem to be able to ‘catch’ what the other might be thinking about out of the blue, but I’d bet good money a lot of couples married that long do the same thing.
For more clarification, not all Highly Sensitive persons are Empaths, but all Empaths are Highly Sensitive. Most Empaths have been told they were too sensitive or overly emotional as children. Being Highly Sensitive is a struggle for many, with our sensitivities often being physical in nature; bright lights, loud noises, big crowds, skin sensitivities, being especially susceptible to caffeine, medications, scents, allergies, etc. Even clothing can be irritating. I’ve heard of others that can’t handle anything with tags or even seams. (I suffer from this to a lesser degree. See this article: To Wear A Bra or Not To Wear A Bra.) Highly Sensitives brains process incoming stimuli more thoroughly; therefore, they may be more easily moved by the emotions of others, music, and media. Empaths take these sensitivities up a notch or two, processing all the stimuli/energies coming at them, where others unconsciously filter what they process, like who’s voice to listen to in a crowded space. Which is an excellent protective feature you have no idea how lucky you are to possess! If someone is trying to talk to me with just the TV on, I can’t tune out the TV. Even if I’m not actively listening to it, I can make out only a portion of what the other person has said.
As an Empath, you may take on other people’s physical pains as well. I spent a week alone watching my daughter’s cattle and other critters while she took a trip to Mexico. That week alone in the middle of nowhere left me feeling relaxed, rested, and I even forgot to take my heartburn meds. I didn’t need them. Lost weight, even. When my husband showed up to pick me up a day early, within 45 minutes of him being there, my heartburn raged. I suddenly had a headache, I was limping due to a sore ankle, and my back started aching. My husband does not take good care of himself. I have to consciously block myself from taking on his physical issues.
Merriam-Webster defines Clairsentience as “perception of what is not normally perceptible.”
To gain a clearer understanding, let us break the word down from the French language, Clair- meaning “clear” and Sentience, meaning “feeling.” So it translates to “Clear feeling.” Basically, it is obtaining information from intangible means. Sometimes, you just know. It’s a heightened level of intuition. One’s whole body is like an antenna, 24/7; only it takes years of practice to tune in to one station at a time. The constant ‘static’ can be deafening/exhausting. Being Clairsentient takes up a ton of emotional energy.
Some indicators of Clairsentience that I experience are:
Overwhelm in crowds. So many energies, so much stimuli, it’s exhausting. I don’t go shopping from mid-November through December; I can’t handle all those stressed people. I attend one writer’s conference a year, and I have to prepare myself for it ahead of time mentally, and I’m still usually in bed by 9 pm, not taking in much of the mingling opportunities. I used to drink to numb out at parties. It’s not a healthy coping technique.
Even analytical types will follow their gut first. I’m an Aquarian. We’re often known for seeming detached and cold, but we are simply more in our heads, which I am continually thankful for, or I’m sure I would have had a breakdown decades ago. Anyway, I used to have to haul water for our household, living out in the country. I met many of my neighbors at the water station, got friendly with most of them. But one neighbor and his brother set off alarms in my head, literally. Flashing red lights behind my eyes, and my heart rate skyrocketed. There was no outward reason for this. He was trying to make small talk, but I was rude and curt, which was not my style. I sat in my 3-ton truck and pretended to read a book I had with me, but I couldn’t focus on the page. He had a smooth, comforting voice and never said anything offensive, yet no matter how rude I was, it rolled off him like water off a duck’s back. My body/intuition told me I was in the presence of a sociopath. Then he told me his name, and it was confirmed; the one neighbor my husband had told me to watch out for. When I told him who my husband was, he took two steps back, and I got the hell out of there. It took me almost 24 hours to shake the oily, greasy feeling off myself, or maybe my aura. I even tried brushing and rubbing it off my body. I couldn’t get rid of it.
[SIDE NOTE: We may believe our spirit is inside of us, but I feel it’s the other way around, with our bodies residing inside our spirit. I believe our personal bubble is our spirit; that’s why we can feel uncomfortable when someone is in our bubble. Your ‘space’ is defined by the Personality Line. (Think of Leonardo DaVinci’s Vitruvian Man drawing, his arms and legs out to the side, touching the bubble’s edge.) As a clairsentient empath, I don’t have a defining edge to my bubble. Maybe that’s why the closer you are to me, the easier I can get up into your deep, dark places.]
Dark energies make you feel uncomfortable or even ill. See above.
Needing lots of quiet time, especially in nature. I found more peace out under a tree than anywhere else. I walked alone out in the countryside and would hide in my garden from my kids. They knew I would put them to work if they came to bother me.
We tend to be great listeners. Total strangers will stop me on the street or in grocery stores to tell me their life stories. Acquaintances recognize I am someone they care share issues with since I can remember small things about them from long-ago conversations. They sense I actually hear them. I’m also someone who would rather listen than speak, so I’m not busy formulating what I need to say once there’s a break in their story.
We are often labeled as over-sensitive or too emotional. Yes, even cold Aquarian me was told I was too sensitive as a child. But I’ve always kept my emotions to myself, for the most part. Maybe because I was able to read others’ emotions, I felt exposed if I revealed mine. I make it a practice not to call others out on their emotions. They are meant to be private, and I hate feeling like a voyeur. I certainly don’t reveal what I know. It can be lonely, though, understanding others and what they are emotionally going through, but unable to share my own. My intensity scares people off.
You get anxious or chills, or even a racing heart rate in certain places, without any physical evidence for why. There’s one intersection in the city that my heart would start racing every time I came up to it. I hadn’t had any experiences there. Was I going to in the future? I didn’t go out of my way to avoid it, but I was always extra careful going through it. This went on for years. Then I heard a man on a bicycle was hit in that intersection and later died from his injuries. The hit-and-run driver was eventually caught. The racing heart rate stopped when I went through that intersection after that. Of course, I feel guilty, just thinking I might have been able to somehow prevent that from happening, but how?
You can read between the lines, see the big picture, know things you shouldn’t know. I know what you aren’t saying, or at least that you are withholding something. I will always follow my gut when making decisions, even if the big picture isn’t in clear focus. Did I mention earlier about drinking to numb out? This sometimes backfired, and my guard would drop, I would get too deep into someone and slip up; I’d tell them something about themselves that I shouldn’t know, especially since I just met them. I’d freak them out.
Or knowing an ex was showing up in a bar in a city I wasn’t familiar with and freaking him out when I gave him heck for taking so long to get there. He himself didn’t know his buddy was bringing him there and knew his buddy didn’t know me. (This was long before cell phones.)
You can feel the emotions of people you are emotionally close to, even if they are far away. There are days I feel tied in knots like I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop, but I have no personal reason to feel that, or I sit down and cry for no reason, and it’s heartbreaking. I sense someone close to me is in great distress, and I don’t even know who for sure. One morning I woke up crying, not knowing why, and found out later in the day that a friend had put down her 16-year-old dog in the middle of the night. “So that’s why I woke up crying this morning.” I blurted. You get funny looks when you do that.
Or I’d wake up with the name of a person on my mind that I haven’t thought of in years. I’d send up a prayer for them and ask St. Mike to look in on them for me, especially when I see ‘cardiac arrest’ after their name.
You can sense other people’s motives, intentions, feelings, and their next move without even interacting with them. I know when someone is lying to me or trying to con me. I understand what Players ‘feel’ like, and I know when people are sincere. I’ve attempted to warn others about dealing with specific individuals, but rarely do they listen. I can’t give them concrete proof. It’s also helpful in physical altercations, for example, sparring matches. I know what my opponent is going to do before they do it. Sometimes I can ‘see’ it before they’ve even moved.
You often use ‘I feel’ and ‘I sense’ rather than ‘I think.’ See above. Repeatedly.
Some things do slip by me. Lots, actually. I’m not omnipotent. I don’t read minds, and I don’t go digging around in other people’s business. I’d rather block it out or ignore it; it’s too much to deal with on a day-to-day basis. I have less and less energy to deal with it all. So yes, my husband was able to plan me a surprise birthday party. Yes, he was acting weird, but I ignored it. I don’t try to analyze everything that comes my way. Like I mentioned earlier, the constant static is overwhelming. There are posts and books and videos on protecting oneself from the continuous bombardment people like me face. I wish I could use it to help people, not find myself trying to block it all the time.
Clairsentient Empathic abilities are overwhelming for children. They don’t understand what they are experiencing and often don’t have someone to explain it to them. They may not be able to discern someone else’s emotions from their own or can’t understand why they feel what they feel. It takes practice and mindfulness to sort out what is ‘ours’ vs ‘others’ emotions. I grew up in a safe, happy home, yet looking back, I felt emotionally abused. Not by my family, but because I was subjected to everyone else’s emotions around me; at home, at school, among my friends, etc. I knew which people made others uncomfortable. I knew who had a secret crush on who, I knew when others were mad or upset, even if they tried to hide it, I just knew.
Feeling other people’s anger would scare me, even though it wasn’t directed at me. I vividly remember a friend of mine being yelled at by her father for a minor indiscretion. The thing was, he wasn’t mad at her, I knew that much. He was just taking it out on her. But the things he said to her cut her to the core. All I could think at the time was, “I’m just a kid, but I can see the damage he is doing to her, and he’s an adult. Shouldn’t he know better?” So the illusion I held that adults knew everything fell apart at a very young age. But why could I see/know things everybody else didn’t seem to understand?
The pandemic has not affected my life very much. I practiced social distancing before it was a thing and have become somewhat of a hermit, working on the farm, staying home, keeping to myself. The drain of being a Clairsentient Empath has drawn me into myself. As I mentioned, I wish I could use it to help others, because as an Empath, we feel it’s our purpose. But health issues use up what little energy I have. I have dreams of volunteering with birds of prey or victim services, but I have learned I need to take care of myself first and not carry other people’s problems for them any longer. It isn’t helping them cope and certainly isn’t helping me. I’m still learning how to handle this gift, and figuring out what I’m supposed to do with it. It’s not a cool party trick, trust me. It’s a responsibility and sometimes feels like a curse.
Bibliography
Karla McLaren, The Art of Empathy (Boulder, CO: Sounds True, 2013), p.5.
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