Valentine’s Day at Work: Beware of Cupid as Career Killer (Part 1)
Stay vigilant about office dating and romance, including in remote jobs…
You may have heard the old adage: Don’t mix business and pleasure.
This warning to proceed cautiously is especially applicable to romance in the workplace. And while it’s important to heed this advice every day, it’s particularly relevant when Valentine’s Day occurs during the work week.
Regardless of whether you work remotely or in a brick-and-mortar office building, you don’t want Cupid’s arrow to strike at the heart of your career and wellbeing.
Although it’s possible that office dating can send you to the honeymoon suite, it can also land you in the heartbreak hotel. You don’t want to find yourself stuck outside on the company doorstep or in a red-hot legal mess.
That’s why it simply makes common sense and career sense to take it super slowly and keep your guard up. Why take unnecessary risks with your gainful employment?
Whether you’re the one shooting Cupid’s Arrow or being struck by it, workplace romance can have a detrimental impact on your work life.
Office dating can damage your prospects for career advancement, as well as negatively impact your health — causing job engagement and productivity to plummet.
Avoid the Fruitless Fling
Rather than embracing a meaningless fling at work, strive to instead maintain professionalism at all times per fostering a safe and respectful work environment.
Make sure to abide by the norms and values which reflect your company’s culture and brand image. Make sure you’re in compliance with workplace laws, rules and regulations. Talk to HR first if you don’t know.
Although some co-workers may date and marry, others end up with broken hearts and pink slips.
That’s why it’s essential to carefully weigh the pros and cons of any potential workplace romance prior to making rash decisions. This advice takes on added meaning during Valentine’s Day, which may cause you to feel love-struck and risqué.
The prudent course is taking office romance outside the office and keeping your hormones in check inside the office — including virtual workspaces.
Caught in a Bad Romance
Some people still say that a positive work romance can help elevate employee engagement, leading to higher morale and greater productivity.
But the opposite is true about getting caught in a bad romance, which can cause your performance to plummet and result in a host of other problems — from dreading work to facing investigations and litigation.
Employees tend to get in trouble most when they are overzealous and persistent in making unwanted romantic gestures.
This extracurricular activity, so to speak, can occur whether an overture of true love or fleeting lust is real or perceived, explicit or implicit, intentional or unintentional.
Such situations arise when one party receives a negative response yet continues to act in a salacious, egregious or provocative way. If this happens, then the aggressor should quickly and sincerely apologize for any misunderstanding. Then walk away.
If you happen to be in management, never engage in what might be misunderstood or alleged as a pattern or practice of creating a sexually hostile workplace, regardless of whether it’s true or false in actuality.
Remember that a workplace romance gone bad can poison the office environment, sabotage team dynamics and harm company culture.
The Takeaway
Prior to engaging in any romantic actions toward a coworker, subordinate or boss, first seriously consider how quickly such an action can land you on the unemployment line.
Ask yourself if “hooking up” with a coworker is worth the risk over the long term? Do the potential positives outweigh the negatives?
Negative results of a bad romance at work can include allegations of sexual assault, gender discrimination, sexual harassment or retaliation, all of which can cause pain, suffering or emotional distress to one or both parties.
In a worst-case scenario, one or both parties might be subjected to an internal or external investigation and litigation — which can lead to serious discipline, demotion or termination.
If the bad news goes public, you might be “blacklisted” within your industry and shunned by your community.
What one employee assumes is innocent banter or playful conduct can mistakenly be perceived as rude, insensitive or hostile by another person.
This can result in ruined reputations and legal repercussions. Is your career and livelihood really worth the risk of a workplace romance?
Don’t let yourself find out the hard way, especially on and around Valentine’s Day.
What do YOU think about workplace romance and dating?
And don’t miss Part 2 of this series — the main course to the above appetizer…
DISCLAIMER: The information in this article is not legal advice and should not be construed as such. Always check with a qualified attorney or HR official regarding any questions about workplace romance.
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ABOUT ME: I’m a former spokesman and senior advisor for strategic communications at the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. The EEOC is the government agency which enforces federal laws prohibiting employment discrimination. I also worked in the White House Office of Presidential Personnel. You can learn more about me here.