V-DAY: My Victory over Grief and Depression

Begin to Live The Life Awaiting You

The end was inevitable. I always knew the outcome. Enough is enough. This must end. My grief and depression must be engaged and confronted; and I shall prevail. Losing is not an option. Survival is not compulsory, but highly desirable.

Things happen. There is no reason why. Yes, you want to know why, I can understand. What’s lost was so important, so integral in your life and it has turned to dust and nothingness. There must be an explanation. Yes, good things have happened to bad people; and bad things have happened to good people. And yes, bad things have also happened to bad people (who deserve them!); and good things have happened to good people (who deserve them!). Nothing stays unchanged or permanent. We always knew that all things will come to the end. We did not know that their ends always come sooner rather than later. Trust me, they will come, nonetheless. And if we insist that they stay longer than they did not, we risk missing the joy and happiness in the new meanings from new things which must happen in order to enrich the rest of our life.

Did you lose a loved one? Do you lose a job? Did a loving relationship end too soon? Did you go away? Did your child die? Did you have to leave? Did significant other people have to leave? Did you become dependent on others? Did you have a tragic accident? Did you become incapacitated? Lost a limb? Lost some limbs? Lost all limbs? Did a catastrophic disease inflict you? Is your life numbered and shortened? Did life deal you some bad cards? Have friends become toxic? Did you realise that gratitude is not natural? Were your long-lasting friendships far too short? Are your care-givers grudging and reluctant? Did everyone, someone, whom you depend on get on with their lives without you?

Things will pass; and the key to living a victorious life is to simply let go and let them really go away. Let whoever and whatever have passed be in the past.

IT’S NOT SO SIMPLE, YOU WANT TO SHOUT BACK!

The loss is unbearable. The pain is insufferable. The grief is immobilizing. The betrayal is unforgivable. The misunderstanding is profound to the bone. The injustice must be revenged. The revenge must be perfectly executed. The love must be reciprocated. Your efforts must be appreciated, and rewarded. People should see your talented genius. We deserve a 2nd, 3rd and just another chance. Those who did me wrong should have others do them wrong too. I deserve happiness and joy. Such bitterness feeds the insatiable appetite of grief and depression, denying you victory and postpone your tomorrow.

Know that tomorrow is not a mirage of your yester-years. The imposters of grief and depression keep your mind addicted to your sad sweet yesterdays, deluding you that your tomorrows are just their extension. Your V-Day begins by killing the twin imposters of grief and depression. No more excuses; make changes.

RE-CREATE YOUR TOMORROW. BEGIN TO LIVE THE LIFE AWAITING YOU

Banish tomorrow’s inevitability

Of broken hearts and shattered dreams,

Of unrequited love and promises unfulfilled,

Of disappointments and pain.

Of lies and more true lies,

Of elusive happiness,

Of dreamy mirages of joy.

Of betrayal and misplaced trust,

Of fake and toxic friends;

Discover new pathways and fresh challenges

And unimaginable opportunities;

As you embark on fresh journeys to the other side,

Opening doors to unexplored prospects.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” — Viktor Frankl (1905–1997) in “Man’s Search for Meaning” (2nd ed, Beacon Press, 1947).

My healing journey to eventual total victory over the trauma of grief and depression was humbling and empowering. The insightful wisdom reveals that it is an integral part and parcel of life. Life’s awakening journey never truly ends. Its reward is the emboldening magnificence along the enlightening journey with its challenges and prospects. Our lives are further enriched as we exchange and share the lessons and insights of our varied experience.

Post V-Day, you shall shed tears of victory to fill voluminous rivers of joy;

Tears of hope, that a better tomorrow has arrived;

Tears of happiness, that your dreams will become real;

Tears of anger, over past depression and wasted grief;

Tears of pride, of victory in your grasp;

Tears of fear, of tomorrow’s uncertainties;

Tears of confidence, from newfound belief in yourself; and

Tears of sadness, over lost opportunities.

The enemies of tomorrow are your disappointed yesterdays. Griefs and depressions are defeated by the strength of your heart and the logic of your mind. Light up your will of fire, and their light shall shine on you as your own life creator, and the beauty of your unfolding tomorrows even as your mind’s eyes lose sight of past yesterdays, retaining only joyful memories of love and the loving memories of joy.

Victory at last. The answer was in me all these times. All I needed was to reach out deep inside and claimed it for myself. The imposters of grief and depression are gone now, never to return. I have shut the doors on them. Cleanse my life. Unclutter my mind, embrace humility.

The world changes, because I have. This is true wisdom — Change your Mind to Change your Life to Change your Tomorrow. Victory is mine now, and Forever.

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