Spread the Ripple | Kindness

Touched By Love

It is always the smallest things that are the biggest things!

I am recovering from the flu and am having bouts of hyperactivity, as I usually do when I am sick. I am the worst patient ever.

So while cleaning a kitchen shelf (basically rearranging it in frustration), I came across this cute salt and pepper shaker that I never use. I mean, it is too small but so cute that I feel happy looking at it.

Then as if on cue, my friend who is also an ex-colleague, called. We got to reminiscing and after the call, I recalled the story of how I got the salt and pepper shaker you see in the photo above.

This friend’s mom is one of the kindest persons I’ve met, after my own mom, of course, and she gifted it to me ten years ago.

My friend had dropped by my house with papers to sign. I had been de-cluttering at the time and asked her if she was interested in some large containers. She was excited and said that was exactly what she wanted. So, I packed half a dozen in a large bag. Not wanting to give empty containers, I filled one with biscuits. She said she would take them on her way home — she lived close to my place.

As it happened, she couldn’t come home to pick them up that evening as she had things to do. I told her not to worry and said I would drop them off since she does not live far from my place.

So, I set out the next morning, with the large bags, and after some difficulty found her place. Her mom welcomed me in. She was pleased that I had dropped the containers off and insisted that I have some coffee.

Now, that’s usually an offer I can’t refuse — and didn’t. Conscious that I had to get back home as soon as possible as I had work to do, I had the coffee and got ready to leave.

Then, rather reminiscent of my mom, she asked if I had had breakfast. Of course, I hadn’t. She refused to let me leave and said there was no way I was returning home without eating breakfast at their place.

I was touched by love

What followed was a very loving experience that reminded me so much of my mom. I had masala dosa with coconut chutney and sambhar, which she made while I waited. I felt pretty much like a beached whale after I topped it off with another big glass of coffee.

When I finally got ready to say ‘bye, she gave me a coconut and two chunks of jaggery. Traditions vary, but it is usually customary in South Indian families to offer married women turmeric and vermillion when they leave. If available, a coconut, fruits, betel leaves with betel nuts, flowers, a gift, and so on. Sometimes we add bangles depending on what day it is. It is especially auspicious to offer this on Fridays.

You are looking at a coconut, betel leaves with turmeric, a sprig of jasmine, the white packet is betel nut, the red sachet is vermillion, bangles, and a coin.

So, anyway, my friend’s mother offered me bangles as well. But they did not fit, so I gently declined them. Just as I reached their gate, she asked me to wait and rushed back in. She brought a little box with these beauties inside. Ceramic salt and pepper shakers. She said there was no way she was going to use them and gave me the box. I was, of course, delighted and as soon as I reached home, couldn’t wait to place the set on my kitchen shelf where I would see them every day.

As the months went by, my friend’s mom decided to replace all her kitchen containers with the set I sent her, and I was inspired to pass on another dozen or so. And each time I would send her biscuits because my friend told me they became her mom’s favorite.

Then, one day, she had to be rushed to hospital and we were all worried when her health took a turn for the worse. Sadly, she did not recover and breathed her last two weeks later. Her eyes were immediately harvested and thanks to her, someone has the gift of sight today.

After the last rites were performed, they had a ritual called the Vaikuntha samaradhane — these are rituals performed on the thirteenth day after a person dies and it is believed that on this day the departed soul reaches its heavenly abode or Vaikuntha.

I was invited for lunch and took my son along. We had a sumptuous lunch in the traditional South Indian style served on a banana leaf. The cooking was superb and I thanked the caterers who had lovingly served the food, cajoling everyone to eat a little more of this and a little more of that.

Later, while leaving, my friend took me to her kitchen to show me how her mom had arranged those containers. I just couldn’t speak, I didn’t trust my voice. I came back home with a full, yet somewhat heavy heart.

Who knows when a loved one will cease to exist?

So please, celebrate all those lives you touch with love, the lives that touch yours, however fleetingly.

• Don’t hold grudges. Look at the positive side of things.
• Don’t forget to feel grateful.
• Don’t forget to say your I love yous.

Thank you Ali Hall for this wonderful space for kindness ❤

Read my friend James Beaufait’s enlightening story about the Buddha.

Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles ❤ Did you smile today?

Help me support underprivileged children via Ko-Fi. Thank you so much!

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