Too busy learning. No Time To Grow Old
Just grow. Because age is but a number
2022 began well. I mean, 1 Jan was like any other day, except I was excited every time I wrote “2022” and marveled at how we had survived yet another unusual year — referring to the pandemic and all.
On Sunday, I had a pleasant day with a walk around the lake nearby. Got back home, had lunch, lazed, and planned the week ahead. Normal.
On Monday, I woke up feeling dizzy. I laughed it off and went to the bathroom. Not sure what happened next because my head was spinning and the next thing I knew, I was on the floor.
When I came to, I found my head and clothes were drenched (must have grabbed the bucket of water which Sury thoughtfully fills). I had landed on my knees. I had hit my head, which I discovered later, along with shoulder bruises and muscle pulls. I managed to pick myself up really slowly and maneuvered myself onto my porcelain seat of wisdom.
And reflected.
What the hell had happened?
I was afraid now. I somehow managed to make it back to bed. I could not stand without falling again. I had scared the heck out of Sury.
We wondered, could it be high blood sugar? Checked. It wasn’t.
High blood pressure? Checked. Nope. That wasn’t the culprit.
Just sat down, hoping that this too would pass.
It didn’t of course.
Finally, went to the doc in the evening (that’s when he was available and moreover, during these times, going anywhere is scary). He diagnosed it as vertigo.
How could it have happened overnight? Apparently, it can, age and gender no bar.
So now I am on medication and hoping to feel better, soon. Today is day 5. I see the doc on Monday again to decide the next action steps.
This has made me realize yet again, perhaps for the umpteenth time, that learning is a lifelong event. No surprise there.
But there are pockets of time when some lessons arrive when we need them most, regardless of whether we subscribed to them or not.
Ms. Life is really cool that way. She kind of looks out for us. (Of course, it is a she! Who else could be so patient + awesome rolled into one?)
My biggest, and perhaps most valuable life lesson at each turn has been to…
Focus on self-care and health
Of course, living with diabetes helps, as it automatically makes it mandatory to focus on heath via diet, exercise, and constant blood sugar monitoring. Sometimes I am guilty of slacking off. I wonder why, when we are so conscious and enthusiastic initially, we tend to do this. That may not be such a bad thing except with diabetes, there is really no compromise. We reap what we sow… or just weep!
While I have not exactly wept, I have come pretty close to it. I have found excuses, justifying why I did not do certain things. But that is just like painting a wet wall, as my grandma would smilingly say.
And so, once again I am re-learning to pledge to focus on health and self-care.
That hasn’t been the only life lesson, though. There’s more.
I will do the things I want to do without waiting for “someday”.
I don’t know what it is with me sometimes — but I keep thinking that when I'm 40 or 50, depending on my state of mind at the time, I will do certain things. For example, that short haircut. And then being reminded I was already 52. That makes me laugh. Hard.
Six years on and I am no better. And I still haven’t got that planned haircut unless one counts the hurried snipping off of 3–4 inches from the ponytail when I am stressed. I know, dangerous. Nevertheless, it feels good. So, haircut aside, I have made a wish list I am going to tackle steadily. It is a promise to myself.
I will take life lessons from a 3-year-old
When my son was studying on campus, I enjoyed spending the first week of January for five consecutive years there. I would accompany him back after his short December break and enjoy time with a family friend whose kid was then a bossy little 3-year-old. We were quite inseparable. What can I say? I love kids.
In the course of our “conversations”, she strongly felt I should cut my hair really short, just like hers. She also gave me other valuable life advice. Guess what? I guess I should follow it.
What I am actually saying is, I am learning not to wait for an auspicious moment to do things. I’m trying to be like my 3yo friend with whom, to think is to act. The minute she has an idea, she wants to see it happen. Pronto. But because I am an adult, I know I must think before I act. At least some of the time.
I’m also learning that…
Things that stressed me out earlier, no longer do
This one’s major. Things that used to matter a great deal no longer do. This is a good thing since it means my priorities are shifting. I’m learning to focus on the things that bring happiness and not waste time on what is unlikely to matter in the long run. Ask my dust mites! They know I only dust if I must these days!
I have also learned to scale down on buying stuff — be it for my kitchen, myself, or home in general. Learning to focus on needs, not wants, with material things. Oh, that does not apply to books, but I compromised by sticking to only digital versions as much as possible. No dusting required!
I must manage time better
Time management used to be one of my strong points but I went slightly haywire last year taking on more than I could handle at times. I didn’t really plan well, what with a lot of unexpected stuff, but I did remember to enjoy every moment no matter what I was doing even if it wasn’t always planned, which really made it rather delicious. Still, I should get rid of those time-sucks that are no good to anybody!
Dreams come true
Okay, with a mom like mine, I’d be crazy not to believe that. But experiencing it for real in a big way is something else. Things like — I wished I could meet the Dalai Lama and I did. Glorious moment. I prayed that my son should get into a good university, and he did. That my eyes fill up often, thinking of him, missing him, is a different story.
Other random things I learned or allowed life to remind me about are:
- I can write with my finger. Seriously. This post is proof.
- My Mom was mostly right. The difference is, earlier I used to argue futilely, now I realize she actually was right and I feel very happy about it
- I am strong. I’d better not doubt it.
- I must be careful when I am refilling the containers for mustard seeds, black sesame, and cumin seeds. I often mix them up. On the flip side, I know an easy way to separate them.
- A Q tip can only be inserted so far into the ear. Farther in results in bleeding. I found out the hard way. Still recovering!
- I am terrified of the “snooze” button. I wish there was a way to remove it. Of course, I could simply get up.
- Some things (and people) that are seemingly impossible and unbelievable are actually possible and believable.
- People freak out when they discover I am not wearing my mangalsutra (this is like a wedding band, except it is a chain around the neck). They think I am courageous or bold, not to wear it. They don’t know it is pure laziness.
- I must not run when the doorbell rings. I almost always trip over something. Not fun.
- I must not read from my iPad when I go to bed. The thud on my face when I drift off hurts more than the thud of a book. Also, books don’t break. Enough said.
- Almost everything has a funny side. When we see it, things are easier to handle. Wish I could say the same for people!
- I am free to change whatever I want, I don’t need anyone’s permission
- I don’t want to hold on to things. Letting go can be fun.
- It is okay to not want to think sometimes.
- I do not obsess over housework. Or laundry. Or washing up. It is quite alright to slack off occasionally.
- And of course, as always, connect with friends as often as possible. Life can sometimes be too short to postpone the important stuff
Yes, Life is a strict teacher. And she’s reaaaally good at her job.
There’s just no time to grow old. Just grow.
I just read Carrie Kolar’s love note to Liberty Forrest, Author and I am just a bit pissed at myself that I didn’t do it first. Oh well. Carrie is awesome….so, I’ll live with it. Do read — my eyes filled as I read her post.
Vidya Sury, Collecting Smiles ❤ Did you smile today?
One of the reasons I write is to support underprivileged children. Would you consider buying me a cup of coffee? ☕ You can also use Ko-Fi. Thank you so much!
