Tiny Little Lies

365 Days of F(ib)B-ing- Chapter 2

Day 8- January 8

‘Dining at Swagat’.

Dear Diary,

It was Vibha’s birthday. Yes, Ketan wished her as soon as he saw my birthday wishes on her timeline. That is one fast dude; he had apparently already sent a Friend request.

As a new restaurant, the place was swanky and yet not very pricey. Woo-hoo! It was Vibha, her couple friends (I met them some time back) Arun and Seema, Neha, a former roomie (Vibha’s), and my college fellows, Kusum, Sandhya, and me. Yes, a sad lack of dudes but we were making it a Gals night. However, Arun was getting the cake, so we could hardly exclude him.

A simple birthday party with good food, a bunch of friends, and a nice ambiance. But post it on FB, and it becomes akin to a minor Page Three event; the way friends and family respond. Since it is exactly what I want — I am so very happy.

We all contributed towards a “Titan Raga” watch if you were wondering what we gave her.

Day 9- January 9

Dear Diary,

It is Friday again. And I am huddled in this horrible local bus, being jolted along every inch of the Pune Mumbai Expressway, trying to think of an amazing post line.

Nothing happened out of the ordinary today. The same boring project work, the usual status updates (that seem to crawl up to whatever the tally is supposed to be), and the same flirty Friday atmosphere. Fridays bring out the Romeos in the guys and the modeling aspirations in the women. Except for the Senior management. They always alternate between looking awkward or falsely chummy. Ahem. Not a good sight.

Anyway, I am racking my brains for a post, a photo, anything! All I can think of is- “Escaped from work at five-thirty itself! Whoopee!!” But that will not do, especially as some of my colleagues are on my friend list. I am not sure but it cannot possibly do much for my image or career. Oh, wait — the foggy countryside. A photo and a straightforward caption- ‘Scenic Route’. That ought to do it. And of course, I am smart enough to post well after I reach. No point in proclaiming to the high heavens that I left work early, correct?

Day 10- January 10

‘Getting a new haircut’

Whoa!

Dear Diary,

Can you imagine? Me getting a haircut with Ma. No — Ma did not get one. Only I did. But she relented to my repeated nagging/ pleas of allowing me to get my hair cut. I think the news of Rati Aunty’s daughter snagging that Doctor Boy must have made her totally despondent.

Did she think that I really would have made a beeline for some short Doctor, especially someone who cannot even make decent conversation other than ‘Is it time to eat’?

No way.

But Ma’s loss was my gain and now I feel fabulous. If only I can find a way to keep my look intact until the next week.

Hmm! Make that the next hour.

Day 11- January 11

‘Spring cleaning!’ 

What an irony my status is! I hate Ma’s cleaning sprees. I hate anybody’s cleaning sprees.

Day 12- January 12

‘Smile Week — Posing with Teddy’

I swear my FB posts are getting stupider and more cringe-worthy. But they are bringing in the flood of Likes and Comments.

Whoever said ‘Be careful what you wish for — you just might get it’ was so bang on.

Adding just a couple of lines before I fall asleep — long day at work — about the Smile week. We had little teddy bear key chains handed out to everybody in our account and a huge Teddy Bear smiling at the entrance of our doorway. Naturally, I had to pose for a photograph. Thank the Lord I was nicely dressed and my hair was not partying to its own tune at that time. So, out came the camera, I flashed a big smile. The selfie was pretty great but even better was the snap taken by a colleague. He seemed a nice guy — a good smile.

Jessie was eyeing him. Hehehe! Not my type but I loved that expression on her face when she entered and there I was being photographed by someone she was making sheep eyes at! High five!

A great day by my standards.

Day 13- January 13

‘Work, work, work!’

So apt. I am working like a slave trying to cram a week’s work in a day.

Why- is that what you asked? Project Deadline. Client Request. I hate these deadly two-word combinations.

Day 14- January 14

‘Happy Lohri!’**

One of the advantages of being Indian is that your FB posts can be strewn with good wishes on Festival days.

So ideal when you are working like a maniac and have no time to even check notifications and birthdays.

**Indian Harvest Festival

Day 15- January 15

‘Happy Makar Sankranti’**

Slogging again. Barely had time to message Ma and Pa — Happy Pongal. Thank God for forwards and Message Groups — I sent the entire family a nice message.

I hope I reach home in time to add talk time to my account. The online portal stinks.

**Indian Harvest Festival

Day 16- January 16

‘At Rati Aunty’s House Warming function. Congratulations!’

I made it. I actually got into the office at seven and worked like a machine and finished my assigned work before three. I was dreading telling Sourabh (my unpredictable and strict Manager) that I needed to leave by three-thirty max. You can never tell if he will agree to something you say or not. And it would be awkward to tell him with the rest of the team in the nearby cubicles hanging on to every word that passes between us. Not to add that I would have to skip the meeting at four. Sourabh dislikes people skipping team meetings unless for absolute emergencies.

But like a miracle, he entered at eight sharp. Fifteen minutes later — which I thought was enough time for a guy to settle into his place, check emails, or whatever it is that managers do. Like the fabled Christian entering the lion’s den, I entered his cubie and delivered my little speech. And he agreed!

And this is the best part, he asked me if I was going home to Mumbai and offered to drop me as he was, too! Thank you, God!

Of course, I agreed.

I skipped lunch to finish every single file, double-checked my work, sent all the requisite emails, and was done at a quarter to three. Excellent, if I might say so myself. A short trip to the vending machine later, my bag was loaded with chips and Coke and a Pepsi. I needed to at least share some food with my Manager for his chauffeur services. I also bought some chocolates for his kids. I was not sure whether I wanted to give them the chocolates or even if I should. I bought them anyway to be given if I needed to.

At three, the meeting invite was canceled. Yahoo! Sourabh asked if it was okay to leave at quarter to four as he had to send out some emails. (I wonder if that is all that he does — attend meetings, ask for status updates and send emails?) I replied in the affirmative.

And we were off. Quarter past six I am at home, dropped by my manager. Sourabh was nice enough to take the ten-minute detour. Unexpectedly nice, right? My assessment was right, see? He is unpredictable!

Anyway, I gave him the chocolates (it was completely warranted) and at seven twenty, I was at Rati Aunty’s dressed to the hilt and having the time of my life. So wonderful!!

Ma and Pa had already reached in the morning for the puja and had hoped I’d be in time for the dinner party. Though from the welcome I received, I know they had told everyone that I might not be able to get away early. I enjoyed it because I got so much attention and well, it was fun to catch up with everybody. I have even made plans to hang out with Shammi (Rati Aunty’s daughter and my darling cousin) and her Doctor-Boy fiancé tomorrow. So, I know I have a good post ready for tomorrow. How awesome is that!

Day 17- January 17

‘Hanging out with Shammi aka Sarmishta V and two others.’

What is it about being engaged that makes people completely oblivious to their affianced partners' flaws and foibles?

Shammi is a perfect example. Anand aka Doctor Boy acted like the gruff, food-crazy person he is, but she simply did not care or notice. Can you imagine — his response to Shammi’s ‘Hi’ was ‘One moment — I really need to eat!’

Really?

Such a horrible faux pas. True, he had put in eighteen hours of work at the hospital. Granted he did not have anything more than the idli tiffin his mother had given him. But seriously, what is a two-minute wait (which is a generous time for introductions and exchanging pleasantries with all three people) compared to eighteen hours? I am positive he would not have perished in that scant period. But oh no. And he did not offer an explanation or apology or even a thought for what Kittu (my other cousin — Bharti Aunty’s daughter) and I must have thought. But the icing on the cake was Shammi looking so besotted and delighted and adoring. Horrible.

Kittu and I took off to do some shopping leaving the recently affianced couple alone — with loads of food obviously- and had a gala time. FabIndia had a sale on as did Wills, and Kittu and I made the most of it.

But seriously Shammi — what has become of you?

Day 18- January 18

‘Happy Columbus Day’

I know, I know. So silly of me to add this as am completely Indian and this is not an Indian celebration. But frankly, every time my onsite coordinator has a holiday, I love it! Because it means I am spared the bother of taking orders from the faceless entity lording over me from across the seven seas. And that too, for two whole days.

Woohoo!

Long weekend at onsite = fun time for offshore aka me.

Day 19- January 19

‘Passed Certification’

For once, I am happy I studied only the day before for this exam and was busy enjoying myself. Reasons as listed below:

I passed.

I had fun instead of studying.

Had I slogged, I would have felt awful about Jessie’s perfect score. Mine was 92/100 but nothing beats a perfect score.

Despite her perfect score, we still were lauded for our excellent work. [Sourabh keeps track of his team’s achievements. He sent out a congratulatory email to the entire account.]

But I still need to figure out a way to surpass Jessie, or I am definitely not going to make the cut for a promotion. Yikes!! What a sobering thought!

Day 20- January 20

‘Speaking at Toastmasters Club’

Dear Diary,

Did I ever mention that I am part of a ToastMasters club? I am and I have an awesome time. Well, today was my turn to speak. I spoke about everyone’s desire to shine. Basically, my speech was that we must try to better ourselves, pitting ourselves against our own standards and goals, and not compare ourselves with someone else.

Because (Do not worry — I did not begin a sentence with because over there!) the former leads to improvement and contentment while the latter only leads to the rat race, jealousy, and disgruntlement. Everybody loved it!

I am so pleased with myself.

This the second part of my novel 365 Days of F(ib)B-ing. The first chapter can be found here: