avatarChristine Stevens

Summary

An orthotics technician expresses skepticism about a LinkedIn connection request from a systems analyst in Turkmenistan, questioning the relevance of the connection due to their vastly different professions, but ultimately remains open to the possibility of finding common interests.

Abstract

The author of the article, who identifies as an orthotics technician, receives an email notification from LinkedIn about a connection request from a systems analyst working in the banking sector in Turkmenistan. Initially, the author is puzzled and dismissive of the request, considering the apparent lack of professional overlap between the two. Despite this, the author is willing to engage in a meeting over lunch, humorously suggesting the use of LinkedIn's private jet for the connection to travel to their city. The author also mentions dietary restrictions and the lack of suitable restaurants, offering to bring a personal meal of peanut butter and celery. The piece ends on a positive note, with the author embracing the global networking potential of LinkedIn and looking forward to meeting their new connection.

Opinions

  • The author is initially cynical about the purpose and utility of LinkedIn connections, particularly when there is no clear professional common ground.
  • There is a sense of humor and sarcasm in the author's response to the connection request, as evidenced by the tongue-in-cheek suggestion of using LinkedIn's private jet.
  • The author's tone shifts from skepticism to a willingness to be open-minded, acknowledging the potential for unexpected commonalities beyond professional roles.
  • The author seems to appreciate the concept of a global village facilitated by LinkedIn, recognizing the platform's ability to connect diverse individuals.
  • Despite the initial reservations, the author concludes with an enthusiastic anticipation of the new connection, indicating a change of heart about the value of networking on LinkedIn.

This Person Wants to Connect with Me on Linkedin!

Now what do I do?

“group of people hand gesture” by rawpixel on Unsplash

Isn’t it just wonderful? A world of people connecting with one another so that a founder of a tech company can move up higher on the billionaire list — right now he’s only number 635. Yay for Reid Hoffman, the founder of Linkedin! And congratulations on sending me another email with yet another person who wants to connect with me on Linkedin.

The only thing is, I don’t want to connect with anyone at all on Linkedin. I don’t have a Linkedin profile. I don’t have a resume on Linkedin. So I wonder why this person wants to connect with me. And I wonder why I even receive emails from Linkedin. Did I unsuspectingly opt in somewhere along the line? Darn it.

I think you should know, I have nothing at all in common with this person who wants to connect with me. I am an orthotics technician. That means I am skilled at making inserts for shoes, and pouring casts for broken limbs, that sort of thing. The person who wants to connect with me, according to their resume, is a systems analyst for banks. So why on earth should we be “linked in?” Sorry, I just don’t see the point. Yes, it is possible that he will need an insert in his shoe one day. And indeed, I do use a bank. But that’s about as far as it goes. I’m not going to work at a bank. And he’s not going to work at my orthotics company. It’s just never going to happen.

Alright. Maybe I’m overreacting. I might be willing to have lunch with him. I don’t actually know how to use Linkedin. So could you maybe just inform him that I am willing to give it a try? I don’t want to be a Mr. Negative all the time. I’m open to whatever. Maybe we have some literary interests or some hobbies in common.

He lives in Turkmenistan. I don’t even know where that is. But it sounds far away. So if we are going to have lunch, maybe Mr. Linkedin, can you let him use your private jet so he can come to my city for the lunch?

I have certain dietary restrictions I think he should be aware of. I don’t eat meat, dairy or gluten. And in fact there are no restaurants in my city that serve anything I can eat. So I usually just bring my own lunch — some peanut butter and celery. And a bottle of water.

But I am really looking forward to lunching with this person after you fly them to my city from Turkmenistan.

Thanks Linkedin. You really are helping bring people together. I get it now. Sorry about that, I was having a bit of a grump, but now I see the point. It’s really kind of exciting. The global village and all.

I can’t wait to meet my new friend!

Humor
Work
Social Media
Culture
Tech
Recommended from ReadMedium