This Is How Rick’s Parents Fu*ked Up His Life
He nearly committed suicide out of sheer depression.
My friend is in depression for almost six years. He can’t sleep at night, feel lonely, and have a constant fear of being misunderstood. He has been on a self-destructive mission to satisfy his parents for years and failing continuously. Out of depression, he even tried to commit suicide once but didn’t finally make it(thank god! he changed his mind at the very last moment).
I knew Rick (alias) from my university days. A very bright student who was extremely curious about everything. He had a great talent for drawing comics and would make hilarious jokes all the time. Rick was the funniest guy I knew back then, with an incredible sense of humor. He could have been a standup comedian.
But sadly, he has already gotten far away from what he once loved only to fulfill his parents’ desire. His parents literally fu*ked his life.
What Did Rick’s Parents Do?
Rick’s mom and dad are high government officials who live in a fantastic duplex house with wonderful greenery around. Rick only has an older brother who works in a reputed private organization. The family is financially very sound and treated with respect in society. I mean, in every aspect, they seem to be a perfect family from the outside.
But the problem is Rich parents wanted their children to become high government officials like them. Now, as his older brother ends up having a private job, Rick must fulfill his parent’s desire.
Just to give you an idea — in my country (and in most Asian countries), we live with our parents even when we grow up. And many of the major life events like our career, marriage, etc. are highly influenced by them. But the problem begins when our dreams and our parent’s desire becomes do not match. It happens that most of the time, our parents tend to think they know what is good for us, and therefore, they impose their decisions, ignoring what we want.
In Rick’s case, his parents want him to be a high government official. And that’s, he is studying really hard to pass the Civil Service exams and make his parents happy, though he despises it.
To make the matter worse, he failed a few times in the tests (it happens when you do what you hate). But without trying to understand Rick’s mental state, his parents started blaming him, thinking that he was not trying that much.
Again peer pressure is there, many of his friends are getting the job they want, but he is failing constantly. At one point, Rick started to believe that he lacks the talent to get the job. It ruined his mental health and made him less confident and more worried about his future.
Why Doesn’t Rick Speak Up?
Rick loves his family. He doesn’t want to do anything that may hurt his parents. So, he is working on a mission to make them happy, even when he is experiencing severe depression for years.
Rick is not the kind of guy who can speak up with bravery and courage to say — Enough is enough. Now I want to do what I like to do. He cannot do that. So, many a time, he thought of committing suicide to end this mental pressure. And one time, he nearly hung himself with a rope.
He told me that the pressure was intense. It’s extremely hard to work months after months on something that you hate. Rick doesn’t want to be a govt. officials and he doesn’t care about designation, power, or money. But as his father and mother do, he thinks he has no choice.
I told Rick to consult a good psychiatrist and take proper medication. I told him to open up to his older brother. Because chronic depression can lead to disasters.
Be a Good Parent and Don’t FU*K With Your Kid’s Life
Maybe, I am sounding rude. Because whenever I think about Rick, I become so angry about his parents. Rick even tried a few times to tell them that he is not enjoying it, but his parents didn’t pay any attention to him. To them, it’s crucial to have a solid designation, power, and money in society. So, Rick becomes the victim.
With due respect to all the parents, I must tell you that you are not God, so please stop deciding what your kids will do in the future. It’s really frustrating and may put your kids in real danger you will hardly be able to understand.
Let your children decide what they want and how they want to live their life. Sure, you can show them ways — which one you think is good and why — but please, never force them to choose what you want them to choose.
Most parents suck at it. But you should understand that you are not your child, and they are not you. So, stop controlling their life too much that leads them towards committing suicide.
Let them live their life.
Thank you for understanding.
If you want to read more of my writings, you may check out the following articles.
- Why I Quit My Job While Others Were Busy Saving Theirs (The Ascent)
- How I Unfollowed My Father and Learned Things Differently (The Ascent)
- If Aristotle Were a Medium Writer (The Masterpiece)
- The School of Nature (The Environment)
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