The Psychology of Humility

It’s Great To Be Humble

In our day-to-day lives, we often find ourselves doing things that we either need to do or want to do. This may or may not include working hard at that job or spending some leisure time in the great outdoors.

There’s nothing wrong with managing the different aspects of our lives. We are multi-faceted beings with the capacity to carry many hats across many different environments.

When we work hard, we might downplay some skills and amplify others. For example, perhaps you are a poetic genius with untapped potential who works at that busy office job.

Maybe some nights, you dabble into poetry, receive some praises and awards, and then keep that information to yourself. No one has asked you about poetry so you found no reason to bring it up with coworkers.

In a future job interview, you might find yourself “bragging” about some past accolades. In an effort to please the interviewer, you will say things that you won’t usually express in your day-to-day life. For example, maybe you might disclose that you were the top sales employee at your last gig.

With friends, you don’t have to keep that work persona up. With our loved ones, they get to see our goofy sides and they might be aware of our accomplishments, but we don’t necessarily bring those to the forefront.

Perhaps there are times where you are forced to flex yourself in an effort to establish credibility. For someone like myself, I sometimes struggle to come out of the humble shell. I am often uncomfortable having to disclose personal accolades because I perceive this as being a braggart.

However, I also know this to not be true and yet, time and time again, I find myself in precarious circumstances where someone is surprised at the things I’ve done in my life already.

According to a research study published in the Current Directions in Psychological Science, a research team analyzed studied an increasingly scarce personality trait called humility.

Yes, that’s right, humility is apparently shrinking in today’s environment. I suppose with the number of people trying to aim for the spotlight, certain voices get pushed out and drowned out, causing those who boast themselves to be seen in higher regard.

This is how they defined it:

“We review humility, a trait characterized by (a) an ability to accurately acknowledge one’s limitations and abilities and (b) an interpersonal stance that is other-oriented rather than self-focused.”

It’s curious to see that more and more research is being produced in this field — with an emphasis on how it implicates the greater world. It’s also curious that humility was previously not as explored in the socio-personality arena of psychology. This could be in part because humility rarely sells while the concepts of pride, grit, and forgiveness are increasingly popular.

From the sounds of the paper, measuring emotions like humility are quite complex, since it’s not like you can measure it like you would a blood test. Plus, humility can arise across many contexts for many reasons. Thus, scholars always argued on how exactly one would define it.

Furthermore, traditional measurements relied more on various self-reported measures, which are often hard to replicate in another study. Thus, humility was integrated on a multi-faceted personality measurement framework where it was conceptualized under an interpersonal and intrapersonal lens.

The Two Forms of Humility

The paper identifies two forms of humility: intellectual humility and cultural humility.

Intellectual humility occurs when you might save face on personal ideas, viewpoints and beliefs because of your prioritization towards respect and maintenance of existing friendships.

Cultural humility occurs when you and the other person have a shared membership to a cultural group. This inadvertently reinforces loyalty and commitment to the group, including biases.

Based on this, it can be assumed that people may embody elements of both. For example, perhaps you have an advanced understanding of a specific construct (like a political ideology) because you have a doctorate in the political sciences and have provided consultations for various organizations.

However, your old childhood friend doesn’t agree with your viewpoint. This friend has no idea of your accomplishments and might be in a higher position of influence than you.

Perhaps this person is great in every other avenue of your life. To save face, perhaps you will be gentle with your friend (for now) due to your childhood bonds — and in due time, maybe this friend will change, especially as they get to know you better.

Why Humility Is Important

According to the researchers, humility is generally important to help us increase our self-understanding and helps us to regulate information exchanged in our social relationships. Sometimes, our degree of humility is contingent on who we are most comfortable speaking to.

The researchers developed three hypotheses surrounding this, called the social-bonds hypothesis, the social-oil hypothesis, and the well-being hypothesis.

The social-bonds hypothesis suggests that humility is helpful in forming, maintaining, and enhancing social relationships, where complex processes (like taking care of others) are prioritized over our own self-interests.

This means that if you are close with someone (like a close friend), you are less likely to harm them. Thus, people who are humble harbour more relational advantages than others and come across as more desirable and attractive.

The social-oil hypothesis suggests that humility reduces collateral damages in relationships, especially when there is a high-risk of conflict. For example, if there is a power differential between you and the boss, you might be more humble to evade possible arguments.

Finally, we’re onto the well-being hypothesis, where your humility actually improves your physical and psychological well-being. For example, you can garner:

• Better relationships
• Strong social supports
• Open-mindedness towards new ideas, practices, and beliefs
• Better self-growth
• Increased life satisfaction
• Improved heart regulation

Overall, there’s a lot more to tap into when it comes to humility. As the researchers noted, humility can be further consolidated by the masses and also further explored by scholars.

As for now, humility seems to have many benefits, such as improved social relationships and knowledge, which can be broken down into intellectual and cultural parameters. Then, we went over the social-bonds hypothesis, the social-oil hypothesis, and the well-being hypothesis.

As Thomas Merton once noted,

“Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real.”

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