The Postcard You Will Never Send
Conflict Exercise For Coaches and Therapists
Conflict is uncomfortable. While there are many ways to address angst, “The Postcard You Will Never Send” is an exercise to foster self-awareness, promote insight and cultivate emotional resilience.
No Postage Stamp Required
The concept behind “The Postcard You Will Never Send” is simple. Participants are asked to reflect on a situation or person where conflict coexists. Emotions may range from frustration, anger, disappointment, loss, or sadness. People need to consider their past or current state to determine what they want to share about how the experience made them feel.
Next, individuals are requested to write a message on the back of a postcard, to express what they would say to the situation or individual who caused the conflict.
Once this is complete, participants draw or create a visual representation of how they feel about the experience on the blank side of the postcard. There is complete freedom in the process. People can use their imagination and conceive anything they want, using a variety of available materials.
To conclude, individuals are asked to explore their emotions further and discuss how they can begin to work towards a healing resolution.
Positivepsychology.com explains how most people find it easier to express or recognize hurt and regret when distance exists between the circumstance or person and the conflict.
This is why the postcard activity can be a good self-discovery exercise that helps answer the question, “What will I say to someone if I didn’t have to do it face-to-face?”
Use in Agile Work Environments
Scrum Masters and Agile Coaches who work in the corporate realm can use this exercise as a Program or Sprint Retrospective activity. In times of organizational conflict such as corporate mergers, agile transformations, or lay-offs, “The Postcard You Will Never Send” is a tool to allow individuals to express emotions constructively.
One approach is to encourage the agile team to address the letter to the specific part of the organizational system causing the grief, be it the enterprise at large, a line of business, a program, leadership, a particular team, or an individual. Provided the activity is conducted in a safe and confidential space, willing participants can read their letter and describe their artwork creation to team members. From this feedback, the Scrum Master or Agile Coach can ask powerful questions, documents, keywords, concepts, and uncover action items from the retrospective.
Use In Therapy
This interactive and experiential exercise is ideal in one-on-one or group therapy sessions. Positivepsychology.com explains the art therapy technique as:
one that combines art and psychology, by utilizing the creative process and artistic techniques to support individuals to develop self-awareness, explore emotions and address unresolved conflict or trauma.
Similar to the corporate example, a therapist can ask a patient to explore a broader scope when the conflict exists beyond another human being. One variation is modeled after the seven different types of narrative conflict found in literature:
- Individual vs. Fate/God.
- Individual vs. Self.
- Individual vs. Person.
- Individual vs. Society.
- Individual vs. Nature.
- Individual vs. Supernatural.
- Individual vs. Technology.
Participants can explore the world beyond themselves to express areas of conflict, and it’s personal impact.
There are many variations to “The Postcard You Will Never Send.” Coaches and Therapists who have a desire to keep sessions fresh can utilize this exercise as an aid to enrichening conversations and uncover new insights from patients and clients. Similarly, participants gain a new way to express their feelings toward conflict and are given an opportunity to heal from past and present trauma.
Free Postcard Template And Similar Online Concepts
- Print the Free Postcard Template
- Creativityintherapy.com Postcard From Your Future Self: An Art Therapy Directive
- Shelley Klammer Expression Art Inspirations 100 Art Therapy Exercises
- A fun online concept Share A Secret postcard
- The Travel Hack Post Cards I’ll Never Send
- Dailymail.co.uk Postcard App
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